{"title":"Funny Anxiety Shirts","description":"\u003cstyle\u003e\n.collection-intro {margin: 0 0 15px 0;}\n.collection-intro p {margin: 0 0 15px 0; line-height: 1.6;}\n.trust-signals {background: #e8f5e9; padding: 12px; border-radius: 6px; text-align: center; font-size: 13px; margin: 10px 0 15px 0;}\n.desc-collapsed {max-height: 0; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease;}\n.desc-expanded {max-height: 5000px;}\n.read-more-btn {background: #3498db; color: white; border: none; padding: 10px 20px; border-radius: 5px; cursor: pointer; font-size: 14px; margin: 10px 0 20px 0; font-weight: 600;}\n.read-more-btn:hover {background: #2980b9;}\n\u003c\/style\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv class=\"collection-intro\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWelcome to Unethical Threads' funny anxiety shirts collection where humor meets premium craftsmanship. Our funny anxiety shirts feature original designs that refuse to play it safe, guaranteed to spark conversations. Available in sizes S-4XL with fast shipping and a 30-day satisfaction guarantee.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"trust-signals\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e✓ Free Shipping On All Orders\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ 30-Day Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ Sizes S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cbutton class=\"read-more-btn\" onclick=\"var desc = document.getElementById('collection-desc-funny-anxiety-shirts'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-collapsed'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-expanded'); this.textContent = desc.classList.contains('desc-expanded') ? 'Show Less ▲' : 'Read More ▼';\"\u003eRead More ▼\u003c\/button\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv id=\"collection-desc-funny-anxiety-shirts\" class=\"desc-collapsed\"\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eAbout Our Funny Anxiety Shirts Collection\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePremium Quality \u0026amp; Features\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePerfect Occasions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eWhy Choose Unethical Threads\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRelated Collections:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-shirts\"\u003eComplete Funny Shirts Collection\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-beach-shirts-for-women\"\u003eFunny Beach Shirts For Women\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-birthday-shirts-for-adults\"\u003eFunny Birthday Shirts For Adults\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"CollectionPage\",\n  \"name\": \"Funny Anxiety Shirts\",\n  \"url\": \"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-anxiety-shirts\"\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"good-bush-bad-bush-george-w-bush-funny-inappropriate-trucker-hat","title":"Good Bush Bad Bush George W Bush Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Good Bush Bad Bush George W Bush Hat from Unethical Threads puts two very different meanings of \"bush\" on the same trucker hat and lets your brain sort it out. Presidential humor meets anatomy humor. You already know which one you noticed first.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually wearing this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think presidential humor peaked somewhere between hanging chads and \"Mission Accomplished.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis hat works at barbecues, tailgates, dive bars, and anywhere a crowd can handle a joke that operates on two levels. If someone around you doesn't get it, that's honestly funnier than the hat itself. You'll spot the exact moment it clicks for them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured cotton front panel\u003c\/strong\u003e with full-color print that won't crack or fade on you\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e so your head stays cool while your humor stays questionable\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most head sizes (even the ones full of bad ideas)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic curved bill trucker silhouette\u003c\/strong\u003e because flat brims are a choice, and not the right one\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eOne size fits most\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a great gift.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect for the friend who has strong opinions about both politics and personal grooming. Works for birthdays, White Elephant, Father's Day, or just because you saw it and immediately thought of someone specific. That person knows who they are. You know who they are. Just buy it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. The snapback closure fits most head sizes comfortably.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or peel off?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. The design is printed directly onto the front panel for color that stays put.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat appropriate to wear in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a double entendre, not a felony. Most people will either laugh or stare, and both outcomes are fine by us.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does Good Bush Bad Bush mean?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt means exactly what you think it means. If you're not sure, this probably isn't your hat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42012842524754,"sku":"4882852_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Good_Bush_Bad_Bush_Funny_Inappropriate_George_W_Bush_Trucker_Hat_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481902"},{"product_id":"less-naggin-more-gaggin-funny-trucker-hat","title":"Less Naggin More Gaggin Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Less Naggin More Gaggin hat from Unethical Threads is exactly what it sounds like. A trucker hat for the guy who said the quiet part out loud and decided to wear it on his head. You already know if this is for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eGuys who've been in a relationship long enough to find this hilarious. Also single guys who want to stay that way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the kind of hat that tells everyone at the cookout exactly where you stand. No further explanation needed. If you have to ask, it's probably not for you, but you clicked anyway, so here we are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured front panel\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds its shape (unlike your last argument)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMesh back panels\u003c\/strong\u003e for airflow, because you're going to need to cool off\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eSnapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e that adjusts to fit most heads and most egos\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-quality print\u003c\/strong\u003e that stays crisp wash after wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eComfortable all-day wear\u003c\/strong\u003e so you can commit to the bit from morning to last call\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOne of the best. If you know a guy who needs this hat, he probably really needs this hat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect for birthdays, bachelor parties, or just because you saw it and immediately thought of someone specific. Pair it with a straight face for maximum delivery.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. The print holds up through regular washing. Your patience might fade first, but the hat won't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. Snapback closure fits most head sizes comfortably.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. That's the whole point of putting it on your head.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou can wear it anywhere you're brave enough to. We just make the hat, we don't write your apology texts.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Light Pink \/ White \/ Light Pink","offer_id":42012853305426,"sku":"3863036_16750","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ White \/ Black","offer_id":42012853338194,"sku":"3863036_15908","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White","offer_id":42012853370962,"sku":"3863036_15905","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Less_Naggin_More_Gaggin_Funny_Inappropriate_Trucker_Hat_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481913"},{"product_id":"legalize-cocaine-25-funny-gen-z-humor-meme-t-shirt","title":"Legalize Cocaine 25' Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Legalize Cocaine 25' Tee is Unethical Threads at peak irreverence. A parody shirt that says what your inner voice screams at every boring party. Wear it to a cookout, a festival, or just the grocery store if you're feeling particularly unhinged.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho Actually Wears This?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who peaked in the group chat. If your sense of humor has ever made someone audibly gasp at a family function, congratulations, you found your uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe Legalize Cocaine 25' Tee pairs well with poor decisions and an absolute refusal to read the room. It's the kind of shirt that either makes you the funniest person at the party or gets you uninvited from the next one. Both outcomes are acceptable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper freebie from a 5K you didn't run\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL (everyone deserves to make questionable fashion choices)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck. Nothing fancy, just the right frame for the chaos.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG print for colors that stay loud long after your reputation doesn't\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMachine washable, because we know where this shirt is going\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs This Actually a Good Gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the best gift. Nothing says \"I know exactly who you are\" like handing someone a Legalize Cocaine tee at their birthday party in front of their parents.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is a gag gift that people actually wear, which is the highest compliment a funny shirt can get. Perfect for white elephants, bachelor parties, or anyone on your list who you'd describe as \"a lot.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually about legalizing cocaine?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's a parody. You're wearing a joke, not running for office.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Legalize Cocaine 25' Tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSizes S through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Runs comfortable, not boxy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's a DTG print on heavyweight cotton. Wash cold, tumble dry low, and the colors stay put.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eLegally, yes. Socially, that's between you and whatever room you're walking into.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gag gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eOnly if you want them to either become your best friend or never speak to you again. High risk, high reward.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42019167371346,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42019167404114,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42019167436882,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42019167469650,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42019167502418,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42019167535186,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42019167567954,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42019167600722,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42019167633490,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42019167666258,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42019167699026,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42019167731794,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42019167764562,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42019167797330,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Legalize_Cocaine_25_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481928"},{"product_id":"men-eat-what-donkey-t-shirt-funny-inappropriate-ass-adult-humor-tee","title":"*NEW* Men Eat What? Donkey Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Men Eat What? Donkey Tee from Unethical Threads is exactly as unhinged as it sounds. Two startled donkeys. One very loaded question. If you know, you know, and if you don't, this shirt isn't for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who don't need the joke explained to them. Your friend group's designated chaos agent, the person at the cookout who says what everyone else is thinking. If your humor runs dark and your wardrobe runs loud, welcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper freebie from a 5K\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e (yes, we see you, big guys)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e because some things don't need reinventing\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors don't bail after the first wash. Unlike your dignity.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-shrunk.\u003c\/strong\u003e We thought of everything except your reputation.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the best kind of gift. The kind that makes someone laugh so hard they forget to say thank you. Perfect for birthdays, bachelor parties, or that friend whose sense of humor you've quietly admired from a safe distance. Just make sure you know your audience. If you give this to the wrong person, that's on you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does the Men Eat What Donkey shirt mean?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf you have to ask, you might not be ready. But the donkeys on this shirt look very concerned for a reason.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eRuns true to size in a relaxed, unisex fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes. Available S through 4XL.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003ePre-shrunk cotton. It holds up just fine.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDepends on where you work. If your boss laughs, you're golden. If HR has a file on you already, maybe save it for the weekend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gag gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eOne of the best. Just make sure the recipient actually has a sense of humor. We can't help you if they don't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42021085053010,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42021085085778,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42021085118546,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42021085151314,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42021085184082,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42021085216850,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Men_Eat_What_Donkey_Ass_Inappropriate_Adult_Humor_Funny_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481931"},{"product_id":"cant-breathalyze-meth-t-shirt-funny-offensive-meme-humor-tee","title":"Can't Breathalyze Meth Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Can't Breathalyze Meth Tee from Unethical Threads is for the kind of person who makes a room go quiet before it goes loud. It's unhinged. It's technically correct. And it's on a shirt now because nobody in our lives tells us no.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe same people who send memes in the group chat that get zero replies and one screenshot. Look, if your humor has ever made someone physically leave a conversation, this is your uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's not for everybody. That's the whole point. This is the kind of shirt that sorts people into two camps on sight, and you already know which one you're in.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that feels like a real shirt, not a napkin with sleeves\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the colors stay locked in. No cracking, no peeling.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs well with poor decisions\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this going to offend people?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. If you're the type to worry about that, this probably isn't your shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe people who wear Unethical Threads already know the assignment. Everyone else can read it, process their feelings, and move on. You're not here to make friends. You're here to make a point, and the point is hilarious.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. Unisex relaxed fit from S to 4XL. If you're between sizes, go with your usual.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or crack?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. DTG printing puts the ink directly into the fabric. The colors hold up, no cracking, no peeling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDepends on where you work and how attached you are to your employment.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf you know someone whose humor could clear a building, yes. If you're not sure they'd laugh, that's your answer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the shirt made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eHeavyweight cotton, crew neck, built like an actual garment. 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The internet argued about how many men a gorilla could fight. We heard something different.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe guy at the gym who won't shut up about gorilla grip strength. The friend who makes every group chat worse on purpose.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBasically anyone who saw the gorilla meme and immediately went to the darkest possible place. 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This is what you give when a gift card feels too safe and you want to see genuine shock on someone's face.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIdeal for gym rats, meme addicts, or anyone whose sense of humor peaked in a group chat at 2 AM. Fair warning: they will wear it everywhere.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt run true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. It's a unisex relaxed fit available in S through 4XL. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. The design is DTG printed directly into the fabric, so colors hold up wash after wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this actually offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat depends entirely on how fast people read it. Most will do a double take. Some will laugh. A few will never speak to you again.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to the gym?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou can and you should. Heavyweight cotton holds up to a full session, and the shirt basically guarantees nobody asks to work in with you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHow long does shipping take?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMost orders ship within 3 to 5 business days. You'll get a tracking email once it's on the way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42039149854802,"sku":"GorBeato-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42039149887570,"sku":"GorBeato-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42039149920338,"sku":"GorBeato-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42039149953106,"sku":"GorBeato-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42039149985874,"sku":"GorBeato-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42039150018642,"sku":"GorBeato-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42039150051410,"sku":"GorBeato-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42039150084178,"sku":"GorBeato-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42039150116946,"sku":"GorBeato-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42039150149714,"sku":"GorBeato-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42039150182482,"sku":"GorBeato-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42039150215250,"sku":"GorBeato-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42039150248018,"sku":"GorBeato-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42039150280786,"sku":"GorBeato-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_m_Not_A_Gorila_But_I_Can_Beat_Off_A_Hundred_Men_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482071"},{"product_id":"sesame-street-funny-cocaine-gen-z-meme-t-shirt","title":"Sesame Street Sequel Tee (Back Design)","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Sesame Street Sequel Tee from Unethical Threads is the episode PBS never aired. Your favorite felt friends, off the clock and deep into some extracurriculars. Back print, because some jokes hit harder when people read them as you walk away.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who grew up on Sesame Street and turned out like this. You know who you are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe type who ruins group chats, sends memes that get you muted, and treats \"too far\" as a suggestion. If your sense of humor peaked somewhere between cursed memes and cancelled TV bits, the Sesame Street Sequel Tee is your uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with a print on it\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay as vivid as your childhood trauma\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBack design only\u003c\/strong\u003e (the front stays clean for plausible deniability)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a friendship test disguised as a tee.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf they laugh, they're your people. If they don't, you were going to outgrow them anyway. Perfect for white elephants, birthdays for the friend who \"has everything,\" or honestly just treating yourself because nobody else gets your humor like you do.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an official Sesame Street product?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. PBS has not called. We're assuming they won't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's on the front of the shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNothing. The design is on the back only. The front is blank, giving you full deniability until you turn around.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shrink in the wash?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMinimal shrinkage. It's heavyweight cotton built to hold its shape. Follow the care label and you're set.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes are available?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Runs comfortable, not boxy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this going to offend people?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. That's not a bug, it's the entire product.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42042158973010,"sku":"SesBack-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42042159005778,"sku":"SesBack-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42042159038546,"sku":"SesBack-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42042159071314,"sku":"SesBack-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42042159104082,"sku":"SesBack-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42042159136850,"sku":"SesBack-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42042159169618,"sku":"SesBack-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Sesame_Street_Cocaine_Funny_Gen_Z_Meme_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482089"},{"product_id":"chewy-the-raccoon-meth-pipe-funny-news-viral-meme-tee","title":"*NEW* Chewy The Raccoon Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Chewy The Raccoon Tee from Unethical Threads is the only appropriate response to a raccoon getting busted with a meth pipe on live television. If you saw that story and your first thought was \"I need that on a shirt,\" congratulations, you're our people.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who watched the Chewy news segment and immediately sent it to every group chat they're in. The overlap between \"follows local news for the chaos\" and \"owns too many graphic tees\" is a perfect circle, and you're standing in the middle of it. This isn't for people who need the joke explained. If you know, you know.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a costume\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit from S to 4XL (yes, 4XL, we don't gatekeep)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck, because we're keeping at least one thing traditional here\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the colors stay vivid through every wash, no cracking, no peeling\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePreshrunk, so what you order is what you get\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the best gift for the friend who texted you the Chewy story at 2 AM. Birthdays, white elephants, \"I saw this and thought of you\" moments. This is a shirt that says you pay attention to what actually makes someone laugh, not just what's safe. 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If you know, you know.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who peaked in group chats. The ones whose friends screenshot their texts and send them around.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf your humor runs hot enough that you've been asked to \"tone it down\" at a family dinner, this shirt was designed for you. 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If you've ever refreshed a product page 400 times, elbowed someone at a pop-up, or considered crimes for a blind box, this shirt just gets it. Wear the confession.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnyone deep enough in the Labubu rabbit hole to know their spending is no longer rational. Collectors, resellers, people who have restock notifications turned on at 3 a.m.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you've ever had to explain to a concerned loved one why you need another one, you already know this shirt is yours. It's not a cry for help. It's a lifestyle update.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that feels like it cost more than your last blind box (it didn't)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed for color that stays vivid through every wash cycle you keep forgetting to run\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns true to size, so order your usual and get back to refreshing that restock page\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift for a Labubu collector?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect gift, mostly because they've already spent all their own money on Labubu.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight tee, solid fit, and a joke they'll immediately understand. Hand it over at the next restock line and watch them lose it. It's cheaper than actually buying them a Labubu, and honestly, more thoughtful.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the I Would Dropkick A Child For A Labubu tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Plenty of room for your growing Labubu collection and your growing sense of shame.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. DTG printing keeps the colors locked in. Your commitment to chaos should last just as long.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually soft?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight cotton, but not stiff. Think substantial, not scratchy. You'll want to wear it, not just post in it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this around kids?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTechnically, yes. Whether you should is between you and your moral compass. We just make the shirts.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an official Labubu product?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. This is an Unethical Threads original. We're not affiliated with Pop Mart or Labubu. 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If you've been deep in the Labubu meme trenches, this one needs no explanation. If you haven't, honestly, keep scrolling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople whose group chats would get them investigated. The Lajewbu hits hardest with the chronically online crowd who saw the Labubu craze and immediately thought \"this needs to be more offensive.\" You collect niche memes the way normal people collect hobbies, and your wardrobe should reflect that.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that doesn't feel like a tissue paper freebie from a 5K you didn't run\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e from S to 4XL, because bad taste comes in every size\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, classic cut, no surprises\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e for color that outlasts your friendships\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMachine washable\u003c\/strong\u003e (your browser history, however, is not)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this get me in trouble?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProbably. That's kind of the whole deal. The Lajewbu isn't for people who play it safe. Wear it around people who get dark humor, or wear it around people who don't and enjoy the chaos.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's not for the easily rattled. If the name alone made you gasp, this probably isn't your brand. We have other shirts. They're also offensive.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat is a Labubu?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA collectible doll that took over the internet. If you don't already know, the joke on this shirt loses about 80% of its power. Google it, then come back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMinimal shrinkage if you follow care instructions. Cold wash, tumble dry low. Treat it better than you treat your relationships.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes are available?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Everyone's welcome at this particular table.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly if you know the person's sense of humor. This is a \"you get it or you don't\" kind of shirt. Don't gift it to a coworker unless you're fine with an HR meeting.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42084250189906,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42084250419282,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42084250452050,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42084250484818,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42084250517586,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42084250550354,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42084250583122,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Lajewbu_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482272"},{"product_id":"new-its-only-a-problem-if-youre-losing-gambling-funny-shirt","title":"*NEW* It's Only A Problem If You're Losing Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe It's Only A Problem If You're Losing tee is for anyone who's ever justified a bad bet with worse logic. An Unethical Threads original for the gambler who insists they're \"up overall\" despite all evidence. Wear it to the casino, the poker table, or family dinner where you owe your brother money.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePoker players. Sports bettors. Slot machine loyalists who have a \"system.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you've ever said \"I'm not addicted, I'm committed,\" this is your uniform. The kind of shirt you wear when you're up $200 and conveniently forget about last weekend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that can survive a long night at the table\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck (the only safe bet you'll make today)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed for color that actually lasts\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePre-shrunk, so it still fits after a losing streak stress-eating session\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift for a gambler?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes, and they'll love it more than their last parlay loved them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect for birthdays, bachelor parties, or as a subtle intervention nobody will take seriously. If they don't laugh, they're in denial about more than just their bankroll.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this shirt come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works whether you're built like a bouncer or a blackjack dealer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. It's DTG printed directly into the fabric, so the colors hold up wash after wash. No cracking, no peeling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an appropriate gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor a gambler with a sense of humor, absolutely. For your boss or your grandma, maybe read the room first.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the shirt made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight cotton. 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If your entire personality runs on 23 flavors and bad decisions, this is the shirt that finally says it out loud.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who have replaced water with Dr Pepper and aren't sorry about it. The kind of person whose fridge has a dedicated Dr Pepper shelf, whose coworkers know not to touch the mini fridge stash, and who considers \"it's 10 AM\" to be a perfectly fine time for their fourth one. You know who you are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that feels like it costs more than your soda habit (it doesn't)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck, because even degenerates have standards\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG (direct-to-garment) print for color that won't bail after a few washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMachine washable. Your Dr Pepper addiction, unfortunately, is not.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eCan I give this as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAbsolutely. If someone in your life won't shut up about Dr Pepper, this is the gift that validates their whole identity. It works for birthdays, holidays, or just a random Tuesday where you want to make someone's week. Fair warning: they will wear it constantly.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt actually have anything to do with Dr Pepper the brand?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. This is a parody humor tee. We are not affiliated with, endorsed by, or sponsored by Dr Pepper or any beverage company.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Dr Pepper Powered Fuck Machine Tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS, M, L, XL, 2XL, 3XL, and 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe DTG print is designed to hold up. Wash inside out on cold, tumble dry low, and the colors stay put.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this appropriate to wear in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat depends entirely on your definition of appropriate. We'd wear it to brunch. 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