{"title":"Funny Bass Shirts","description":"\u003cstyle\u003e\n.collection-intro {margin: 0 0 15px 0;}\n.collection-intro p {margin: 0 0 15px 0; line-height: 1.6;}\n.trust-signals {background: #e8f5e9; padding: 12px; border-radius: 6px; text-align: center; font-size: 13px; margin: 10px 0 15px 0;}\n.desc-collapsed {max-height: 0; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease;}\n.desc-expanded {max-height: 5000px;}\n.read-more-btn {background: #3498db; color: white; border: none; padding: 10px 20px; border-radius: 5px; cursor: pointer; font-size: 14px; margin: 10px 0 20px 0; font-weight: 600;}\n.read-more-btn:hover {background: #2980b9;}\n\u003c\/style\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv class=\"collection-intro\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWelcome to Unethical Threads' funny bass shirts collection where humor meets premium craftsmanship. Our funny bass shirts feature original designs that refuse to play it safe, guaranteed to spark conversations. Available in sizes S-4XL with fast shipping and a 30-day satisfaction guarantee.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"trust-signals\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e✓ Free Shipping On All Orders\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ 30-Day Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ Sizes S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cbutton class=\"read-more-btn\" onclick=\"var desc = document.getElementById('collection-desc-funny-bass-shirts'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-collapsed'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-expanded'); this.textContent = desc.classList.contains('desc-expanded') ? 'Show Less ▲' : 'Read More ▼';\"\u003eRead More ▼\u003c\/button\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv id=\"collection-desc-funny-bass-shirts\" class=\"desc-collapsed\"\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eAbout Our Funny Bass Shirts Collection\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePremium Quality \u0026amp; Features\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePerfect Occasions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eWhy Choose Unethical Threads\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRelated Collections:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-shirts\"\u003eComplete Funny Shirts Collection\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-bass-fishing-shirts\"\u003eFunny Bass Fishing Shirts\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-italian-shirts\"\u003eFunny Italian Shirts\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"CollectionPage\",\n  \"name\": \"Funny Bass Shirts\",\n  \"url\": \"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-bass-shirts\"\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"im-not-a-gynecologist-but-ill-take-a-look-funny-inappropriate-trucker-hat","title":"I'm Not A Gynecologist But I'll Take A Look Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I'm Not A Gynecologist But I'll Take A Look hat from Unethical Threads is exactly what it sounds like. A trucker hat for the guy who peaked in med school pickup lines and never looked back. Structured front panel, mesh back, and enough audacity to clear a waiting room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eGuys who think being inappropriate is a personality trait (and honestly, they're not wrong).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis hat lives at barbecues, bachelor parties, and anywhere the dress code is \"questionable at best.\" If your friend group has a designated \"too much\" guy, this is his hat. If you don't have that guy, congrats. It's you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured foam front panel\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds its shape (unlike your reputation after wearing this)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e, because your head deserves ventilation even if your humor doesn't\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e, one size fits most heads, no excuses\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eVivid, durable print\u003c\/strong\u003e that stays sharp wash after wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-curved brim\u003c\/strong\u003e, classic trucker profile\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt might be the best gift you can give someone you're not trying to impress.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFather's Day, white elephant, birthday for the friend who already has everything except boundaries. Just don't expect a thank you card from his wife.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this hat come in different colors?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCheck the product options above for available color combinations. Each one pairs nicely with poor judgment.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this hat get me in trouble?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat depends entirely on where you wear it and how easily your HR department gets offended. We just make the hat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. The snapback closure fits most head sizes, so no excuses.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHow should I wash this hat?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHand wash cold, air dry. Treat it better than you treat first dates.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42012848324690,"sku":"6455830_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_m_Not_A_Gynecologist_But_I_ll_Take_A_Look_Funny_Inappropriate_Trucker_Hat.jpg?v=1762481910"},{"product_id":"less-naggin-more-gaggin-funny-trucker-hat","title":"Less Naggin More Gaggin Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Less Naggin More Gaggin hat from Unethical Threads is exactly what it sounds like. A trucker hat for the guy who said the quiet part out loud and decided to wear it on his head. You already know if this is for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eGuys who've been in a relationship long enough to find this hilarious. Also single guys who want to stay that way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the kind of hat that tells everyone at the cookout exactly where you stand. No further explanation needed. If you have to ask, it's probably not for you, but you clicked anyway, so here we are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured front panel\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds its shape (unlike your last argument)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMesh back panels\u003c\/strong\u003e for airflow, because you're going to need to cool off\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eSnapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e that adjusts to fit most heads and most egos\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-quality print\u003c\/strong\u003e that stays crisp wash after wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eComfortable all-day wear\u003c\/strong\u003e so you can commit to the bit from morning to last call\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOne of the best. If you know a guy who needs this hat, he probably really needs this hat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect for birthdays, bachelor parties, or just because you saw it and immediately thought of someone specific. Pair it with a straight face for maximum delivery.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. The print holds up through regular washing. Your patience might fade first, but the hat won't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. Snapback closure fits most head sizes comfortably.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. That's the whole point of putting it on your head.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou can wear it anywhere you're brave enough to. We just make the hat, we don't write your apology texts.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Light Pink \/ White \/ Light Pink","offer_id":42012853305426,"sku":"3863036_16750","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ White \/ Black","offer_id":42012853338194,"sku":"3863036_15908","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White","offer_id":42012853370962,"sku":"3863036_15905","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Less_Naggin_More_Gaggin_Funny_Inappropriate_Trucker_Hat_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481913"},{"product_id":"i-love-finger-painting-im-paint-inappropriate-couples-shirt","title":"I Love To Finger Paint I'm Paint Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Love To Finger Paint I'm Paint Tee from Unethical Threads is a matching couples shirt for people whose love language involves getting a little messy. If you have to ask what the joke is, this one isn't for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who've been together long enough that subtlety died years ago. This is the couple that holds hands in public and makes everyone else uncomfortable. The I Love To Finger Paint set is for partners who treat innuendo like a love language and gift-giving like a competitive sport.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that can handle whatever you put it through (we're talking laundry, relax)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e, because this joke works on every body type\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck, classic cut\u003c\/strong\u003e, nothing weird going on structurally\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay locked in, not peeling off after three washes like a cheap bumper sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMachine washable\u003c\/strong\u003e, though the memories of wearing this in public are permanent\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good couples gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a great couples gift. This is the move for anniversaries, Valentine's Day, or any time you want to remind your partner exactly what you bring to the table. It lands way harder than a candle or a gift card. Honestly, if your significant other doesn't laugh at this, you might have bigger problems than gift selection.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this come as a set or do I buy each shirt separately?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEach shirt is sold separately so you can grab the right size for each person. Pick up the I Love To Finger Paint tee here and the I'm Paint tee on its own listing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNope. DTG printing bonds the ink directly into the fabric. No cracking, no fading, no sad peeling situation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this appropriate to wear in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat depends entirely on your definition of appropriate. We say yes. Your in-laws might disagree.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42013145759826,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42013145792594,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42013145825362,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42013145858130,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42013145890898,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42013145923666,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42013145956434,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42013145989202,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42013146021970,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42013146054738,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42013146087506,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42013146120274,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42013146153042,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42013146185810,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Love_To_Finger_Paint_I_m_Paint_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481916"},{"product_id":"new-rome-wasnt-burned-in-a-day-tesla-funny-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* Rome Wasn't Burned In A Day Tesla Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Rome Wasn't Burned In A Day Tesla Tee from Unethical Threads is what happens when ancient history, corporate hubris, and a factory fire walk into a bar. Heavyweight cotton, full-color DTG print, and the kind of joke that makes people either laugh or quietly unfollow you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who read the news and cope with laughter instead of therapy. If you've ever watched a press conference and thought \"this is performance art,\" you're the target audience.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt also does well at cookouts, game nights, and anywhere someone's about to say \"wait, is that real?\" The Rome Wasn't Burned In A Day design hits that sweet spot between clever and unhinged, which is basically our entire brand.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like you paid for a shirt, not a napkin\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S to 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e, because dark humor isn't size-exclusive\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, because we're chaotic, not tacky\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG (direct-to-garment) print\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay vivid through every wash, not cracked and peeling after three spins\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eYes, you can machine wash it. We're not monsters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. That's sort of the point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis tee sits at the intersection of historical wordplay and modern tech satire, which means it'll land perfectly with some people and make others visibly uncomfortable. If both of those outcomes sound fun to you, you're in the right place.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an anti-Elon shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's a shirt about Rome. And fire. And a certain electric car company that keeps having both. Draw your own conclusions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works on every body type.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's heavyweight cotton with a DTG print. Wash cold, tumble low, and it'll hold up fine.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift for someone who hates Elon Musk?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWe can't think of a better one. Wrap it or don't, the reaction will be the same.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42016368754770,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42016368787538,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42016368820306,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42016368853074,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42016368885842,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42016368918610,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42016368951378,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Rome_Wasn_t_Burned_In_A_Day_T_Shirt_Funny_Offensive_Tesla_Tee.jpg?v=1762481927"},{"product_id":"jesus-is-rizzen-rizz-easter-t-shirt","title":"Jesus Has Rizzen Rizz Easter Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Jesus Has Rizzen tee from Unethical Threads. Because \"He is Risen\" was begging for a Gen Z rebrand. Heavyweight cotton, unisex fit, and the kind of Easter energy your youth pastor wishes they had.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eChurch kids with a sense of humor. Youth pastors trying to stay relevant.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYour cousin who posts memes in the family group chat and never apologizes. The friend who shows up to Easter brunch already wearing the joke everyone else was too scared to say out loud. If you've ever sat through a sunrise service thinking \"this needs more rizz,\" congratulations, you found your shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a shirt, not a gas station freebie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, classic, no surprises\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay locked in wash after wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eYes, He looks that good on it\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend someone at church?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. But they'll laugh first.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt lives in the sweet spot where irreverent meets reverent. You're not mocking anything. You're just pointing out that the greatest comeback in history deserved better branding. Most people will read it, pause, and then hit you with the slow nod of respect. The rest weren't going to like you anyway.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the Jesus Has Rizzen shirt blasphemous?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly if you think Jesus wouldn't appreciate a good pun. This tee sits firmly in the \"laughing with Him\" category.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works on everybody.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. DTG printing bonds the ink into the fabric. It holds up through washes without cracking or peeling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this just for Easter?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou can wear it year-round. Rizz is not seasonal.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the shirt made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight cotton with a relaxed, comfortable fit. 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LGBTQ pride meets French bakery wordplay on a shirt with absolutely no chill. If you need it explained, this probably isn't your shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think the intersection of bread puns and queer joy is peak comedy. The kind of person who'd rock this at Pride, at brunch, or at Thanksgiving dinner just to watch an uncle quietly Google something under the table. It's a personality test printed on cotton.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that doesn't feel like a paper napkin with sleeves\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in S through 4XL, because funny comes in every size\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, keeping it classic while the graphic handles the chaos\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay locked in (your opinions will fade before this does)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs well with a strong drink and stronger opinions\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly if you know the person. This isn't a safe Secret Santa pick. It's the \"I saw this and immediately thought of you\" shirt, and if that sentence doesn't apply, maybe just get them a gift card.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does Faguette mean on the shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's a mashup of exactly what you think it is. French bread meets queer slang reclamation. If you laughed, you get it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an LGBTQ pride shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes, but with the humor cranked all the way up. It's pride with a side of absurdity, which is honestly the best kind.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit, so it works for basically everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shrink in the wash?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's heavyweight cotton. Follow the care instructions and it holds up fine.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDepends entirely on your workplace. If your HR department has a sense of humor, go for it. If not, save it for the weekend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42055482507346,"sku":"Faguette-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42055482540114,"sku":"Faguette-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42055482572882,"sku":"Faguette-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42055482605650,"sku":"Faguette-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42055482638418,"sku":"Faguette-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42055482671186,"sku":"Faguette-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42055482703954,"sku":"Faguette-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42055482736722,"sku":"Faguette-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42055482769490,"sku":"Faguette-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42055482802258,"sku":"Faguette-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42055482835026,"sku":"Faguette-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42055482867794,"sku":"Faguette-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42055482900562,"sku":"Faguette-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42055482933330,"sku":"Faguette-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Faguette_Baguette_LGBTQ_Meme_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482098"},{"product_id":"nothing-about-me-is-flat-earth-society-funny-boob-meme-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* Nothing About Me Is Flat Earth Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Nothing About Me Is Flat Earth tee from Unethical Threads takes two things the internet can't shut up about and smashes them together. Flat earthers get trolled. Curves get acknowledged. Everyone else just reads it twice and snorts.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually wearing this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think the earth is round but their chest isn't. The overlap between conspiracy meme lovers and people with a sense of humor about their own body is larger than you'd think, and this shirt lives right in the center of that Venn diagram. It's a hit with women who like to make a point (two of them, actually) and the partners brave enough to buy it for them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that feels like a real shirt, not a see-through napkin\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit from S to 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the colors don't bail after three washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSoft enough that you'll forget you're wearing something this inappropriate\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. Flat earthers will be mad you're mocking their movement, prudes will clutch pearls at the implication, and HR will have thoughts. But the people whose opinions you actually value (your real friends, your group chat, that one bartender) will think it's the funniest thing you own.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt about flat earth or boobs?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Nothing About Me Is Flat Earth tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. It's DTG printed directly into the fabric, so the design holds up through every wash without cracking, peeling, or fading.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf the person you're buying for has a sense of humor and a chest, you're golden. If they have neither, maybe grab a gift card.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42059247943762,"sku":"NothingFlat-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42059247976530,"sku":"NothingFlat-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42059248009298,"sku":"NothingFlat-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42059248042066,"sku":"NothingFlat-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42059248074834,"sku":"NothingFlat-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42059248107602,"sku":"NothingFlat-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42059248140370,"sku":"NothingFlat-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42059248173138,"sku":"NothingFlat-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42059248205906,"sku":"NothingFlat-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42059248238674,"sku":"NothingFlat-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42059248271442,"sku":"NothingFlat-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42059248304210,"sku":"NothingFlat-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42059248336978,"sku":"NothingFlat-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42059248369746,"sku":"NothingFlat-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Nothing_About_Me_Is_Flat_Earth_Society_Meme_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482106"},{"product_id":"lajewbu-labubu-parody-funny-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* Lajewbu Labubu Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Lajewbu tee from Unethical Threads takes the Labubu obsession and runs it straight through the chosen people filter. If you've been deep in the Labubu meme trenches, this one needs no explanation. If you haven't, honestly, keep scrolling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople whose group chats would get them investigated. The Lajewbu hits hardest with the chronically online crowd who saw the Labubu craze and immediately thought \"this needs to be more offensive.\" You collect niche memes the way normal people collect hobbies, and your wardrobe should reflect that.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that doesn't feel like a tissue paper freebie from a 5K you didn't run\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e from S to 4XL, because bad taste comes in every size\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, classic cut, no surprises\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e for color that outlasts your friendships\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMachine washable\u003c\/strong\u003e (your browser history, however, is not)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this get me in trouble?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProbably. That's kind of the whole deal. The Lajewbu isn't for people who play it safe. Wear it around people who get dark humor, or wear it around people who don't and enjoy the chaos.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's not for the easily rattled. If the name alone made you gasp, this probably isn't your brand. We have other shirts. They're also offensive.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat is a Labubu?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA collectible doll that took over the internet. If you don't already know, the joke on this shirt loses about 80% of its power. Google it, then come back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMinimal shrinkage if you follow care instructions. Cold wash, tumble dry low. 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Don't gift it to a coworker unless you're fine with an HR meeting.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42084250189906,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42084250419282,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42084250452050,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42084250484818,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42084250517586,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42084250550354,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42084250583122,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Lajewbu_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482272"},{"product_id":"call-of-diddy-funny-offensive-video-game-gamer-meme-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* Call Of Diddy Video Game Parody Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eUnethical Threads made the crossover nobody asked for. The Call Of Diddy Video Game Parody Tee takes your favorite FPS franchise somewhere deeply wrong, printed on heavyweight cotton so you can wear the crime for years.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eGamers with absolutely no shame and a group chat that would get flagged by the FBI.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you've ever laughed at something you definitely shouldn't have, this shirt already has your name on it. It's the kind of tee that makes strangers either nod in respect or pretend they didn't see it. Both reactions are correct.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with a screen print on it\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, because even degenerates have standards\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors don't ghost after three washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs well with questionable life decisions\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the best gift if you know someone's sense of humor. It's the worst gift if you don't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThere is no middle ground with the Call Of Diddy tee. Birthdays, white elephants, or just proving to someone that you truly understand them on a spiritual level. This is the move.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt run true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. It's a unisex relaxed fit available in S through 4XL. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this get me weird looks?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAlmost certainly. That's the whole point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the print quality actually good?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDTG printed directly into the fabric. The colors hold up wash after wash without cracking or fading.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an official Call of Duty product?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. This is a parody tee. 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It's stupid. It's juvenile. You already know you want it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople whose friends already expect the worst from them. This is the shirt for whoever takes it one step too far in the group chat, the one who sends the joke everyone's thinking but nobody says out loud.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWear it to the bar, a cookout, or anywhere you want someone to slowly shake their head at you. 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This is the gift you give someone when a gift card feels too safe and you actually know the person.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWorks for birthdays, white elephants, or just because you saw it and immediately thought of them (and that one night at the Applebee's on Route 9).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit so it runs comfortable on everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shirt get me weird looks?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAlmost certainly. 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Great for birthdays, Pride, white elephant exchanges, or just reminding someone you get their sense of humor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually about the Boeing 737?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's referencing Boeing's well-documented mechanical issues, yes. And also sucking a guy off. It's a two-for-one situation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat material is this made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight cotton with a crew neck. 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We both know you're not hand-washing anything.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eDoes this actually make a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAbsolutely. If someone in your life runs on painkillers and poor decisions, this is their uniform. Birthday, White Elephant, \"sorry about what I said at Thanksgiving,\" whatever works. Just make sure the recipient has a sense of humor. Or don't. We're not your parents.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually soft?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. It's heavyweight cotton, but it breaks in nicely. Comfortable, not cardboard.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes are available?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. DTG printing keeps the colors locked in for the long haul. No cracking, no peeling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this appropriate to wear in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eLegally, yes. Socially, that's between you and whatever establishment you walk into.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHow should I wash this?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMachine wash cold, tumble dry low. Turn it inside out if you want to be fancy about it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42168227659858,"sku":"TPPM-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42168227692626,"sku":"TPPM-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42168227725394,"sku":"TPPM-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42168227758162,"sku":"TPPM-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42168227790930,"sku":"TPPM-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42168227823698,"sku":"TPPM-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42168227856466,"sku":"TPPM-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/ylenol_Powered_Fuck_Machine_T-Shirt.jpg?v=1759527352"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/collections\/Funny_Bass_Shirts.jpg?v=1761607812","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/collections\/funny-bass-shirts.oembed","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}