{"title":"Funny Casino Shirts","description":"\u003cstyle\u003e\n.collection-intro {margin: 0 0 15px 0;}\n.collection-intro p {margin: 0 0 15px 0; line-height: 1.6;}\n.trust-signals {background: #e8f5e9; padding: 12px; border-radius: 6px; text-align: center; font-size: 13px; margin: 10px 0 15px 0;}\n.desc-collapsed {max-height: 0; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease;}\n.desc-expanded {max-height: 5000px;}\n.read-more-btn {background: #3498db; color: white; border: none; padding: 10px 20px; border-radius: 5px; cursor: pointer; font-size: 14px; margin: 10px 0 20px 0; font-weight: 600;}\n.read-more-btn:hover {background: #2980b9;}\n\u003c\/style\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv class=\"collection-intro\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eExplore our funny casino shirts collection at Unethical Threads where inappropriate meets impeccable quality. These funny casino shirts are crafted for those who appreciate humor that pushes boundaries. Sizes S-4XL, free shipping on all orders.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"trust-signals\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e✓ Free Shipping On All Orders\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ 30-Day Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ Sizes S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cbutton class=\"read-more-btn\" onclick=\"var desc = document.getElementById('collection-desc-funny-casino-shirts'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-collapsed'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-expanded'); this.textContent = desc.classList.contains('desc-expanded') ? 'Show Less ▲' : 'Read More ▼';\"\u003eRead More ▼\u003c\/button\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv id=\"collection-desc-funny-casino-shirts\" class=\"desc-collapsed\"\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eAbout Our Funny Casino Shirts Collection\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePremium Quality \u0026amp; Features\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePerfect Occasions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eWhy Choose Unethical Threads\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRelated Collections:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-shirts\"\u003eComplete Funny Shirts Collection\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/cheap-funny-t-shirts-australia\"\u003eCheap Funny T-Shirts Australia\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-ass-shirts\"\u003eFunny Ass Shirts\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"CollectionPage\",\n  \"name\": \"Funny Casino Shirts\",\n  \"url\": \"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-casino-shirts\"\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"diet-cunt-funny-inappropriate-soda-humor-trucker-hat","title":"Diet Cunt Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Diet Cunt Hat by Unethical Threads is a soda parody trucker hat for people who like their humor carbonated and their headwear loud. If you've ever looked at a Diet Coke can and thought \"close, but not quite,\" this is your hat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople with zero interest in playing it safe at the barbecue. Your fantasy football league buddy, the girl at the tailgate everyone gravitates toward, the coworker who makes HR nervous on casual Friday. If you treat your hat rack like a comedy set list, the Diet Cunt Hat is your closer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured foam front panel\u003c\/strong\u003e keeps its shape, because a floppy trucker hat is just a sad visor\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e so your head doesn't turn into a greenhouse by noon\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most head sizes, no excuses\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eFull-color print\u003c\/strong\u003e on the front panel that holds up through sun, sweat, and regrettable decisions\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-curved bill\u003c\/strong\u003e, ready to wear straight out of the bag (we know you're not patient enough to shape it yourself)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's one of the best gifts you can give under $30. The kind where they open it, pause for a second, then laugh so hard they forget to say thank you. Works for birthdays, bachelor parties, white elephants, or just \"I saw this and thought of you\" situations. That last one hits different anyway.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the Diet Cunt Hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. Snapback closure in the back fits most head sizes comfortably.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this hat offend people?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAlmost certainly. That's sort of the point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the print quality like?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eFull-color digital print on the front panel. It holds up through regular wear and washing without cracking or fading.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou can wear it anywhere you're willing to own the room. Some rooms are easier than others.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ White \/ Black","offer_id":42012842852434,"sku":"1743497_15908","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White","offer_id":42012842917970,"sku":"1743497_15905","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Royal \/ Red","offer_id":42012842885202,"sku":"1743497_15909","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Diet_Cunt_Funny_Crazy_Soda_Parody_Inappropriate_Trucker_Hat_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481903"},{"product_id":"i-dont-need-fun-to-have-alcohol-funny-drinking-beer-trucker-hat","title":"I Don't Need Fun To Have Alcohol Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Don't Need Fun To Have Alcohol Hat from Unethical Threads is a trucker hat for anyone who settled the fun vs. alcohol debate years ago. Alcohol won. This snapback just makes it official.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears a drinking hat unironically?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who stopped pretending they drink for the taste somewhere around their mid-twenties.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is the hat you throw on for a barbecue, a tailgate, or your backyard at 2pm on a Tuesday. It tells everyone exactly where you stand without you having to say a word. Honestly, it's doing you a favor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured foam front\u003c\/strong\u003e with cotton twill face, so the print stays crisp even when you don't\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e because nobody wants a sweaty head on top of a hangover\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most heads comfortably (yes, even yours)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eFull-color print\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds up through regular washes and the occasional spill\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eOne size fits most.\u003c\/strong\u003e If your head is truly enormous, that's between you and genetics\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt might be the best gift you buy all year.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis hat is perfect for anyone who's ever said \"I'm not an alcoholic, I'm a connoisseur\" with a straight face. Works for birthdays, white elephants, bachelor parties, or just because you saw it and immediately thought of someone specific. That person knows who they are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the print hold up?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. Full-color print that holds up through regular washes. Treat it like you'd treat any hat you actually like.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSnapback closure in the back. One size fits most adults comfortably.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProbably. But the kind of person offended by a drinking hat wasn't going to be fun at the party anyway.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDepends entirely on where you work and how much you value HR's opinion of you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the hat made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eStructured foam front with cotton twill and breathable mesh back panels. Comfortable enough to forget you're wearing it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Royal \/ Red","offer_id":42012843704402,"sku":"2397894_15909","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ White \/ Black","offer_id":42012843671634,"sku":"2397894_15908","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black","offer_id":42012843638866,"sku":"2397894_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Don_t_Need_Fun_To_Have_Alcohol_Funny_Drinking_Beer_Trucker_Hat_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481903"},{"product_id":"bigfoot-is-real-and-he-tried-to-eat-my-ass-funny-inappropriate-trucker-hat","title":"Bigfoot Is Real And He Tried To Eat My Ass Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis is the Bigfoot Is Real And He Tried To Eat My Ass trucker hat from Unethical Threads. It says exactly what happened out there in those woods, and you survived, so you might as well accessorize.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who go camping and come back different. The guy at the cookout who has a story that starts with \"okay, so I was alone in the woods\" and ends with everyone quietly putting down their plates.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you've ever watched Finding Bigfoot and thought the show was holding something back, this hat is your sworn testimony in foam and mesh.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured foam front panel\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds its shape better than your story about that night in the woods\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e so your head stays cool while you share your truth\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eSnapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most head sizes, no excuses\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eVivid front print\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds color wash after wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eOne size fits most\u003c\/strong\u003e because Bigfoot doesn't discriminate and neither do we\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the ideal gift for the friend who won't stop talking about cryptids. Or the one who tells weirdly specific stories about their camping trips.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWrap it, hand it over, and watch them finally feel understood. Also works as an apology gift, a birthday gift, or a \"sorry I told everyone about your Bigfoot encounter\" gift.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. The snapback closure adjusts to fit most head sizes comfortably.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the hat made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eStructured foam and cotton front panel with a breathable polyester mesh back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or peel?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNope. The print holds up through regular washing and wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat unisex?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. Bigfoot does not care about your gender and neither does this hat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eTechnically, yes. Whether you should is between you and the other people at Walmart.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42012845473874,"sku":"4063455_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Bigfoot_Is_Real_And_He_Tried_To_Eat_My_Ass_Funny_Inappropriate_Trucker_Hat_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481906"},{"product_id":"jesus-is-rizzen-rizz-easter-t-shirt","title":"Jesus Has Rizzen Rizz Easter Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Jesus Has Rizzen tee from Unethical Threads. Because \"He is Risen\" was begging for a Gen Z rebrand. Heavyweight cotton, unisex fit, and the kind of Easter energy your youth pastor wishes they had.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eChurch kids with a sense of humor. Youth pastors trying to stay relevant.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYour cousin who posts memes in the family group chat and never apologizes. The friend who shows up to Easter brunch already wearing the joke everyone else was too scared to say out loud. If you've ever sat through a sunrise service thinking \"this needs more rizz,\" congratulations, you found your shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a shirt, not a gas station freebie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, classic, no surprises\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay locked in wash after wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eYes, He looks that good on it\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend someone at church?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. But they'll laugh first.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt lives in the sweet spot where irreverent meets reverent. You're not mocking anything. You're just pointing out that the greatest comeback in history deserved better branding. Most people will read it, pause, and then hit you with the slow nod of respect. The rest weren't going to like you anyway.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the Jesus Has Rizzen shirt blasphemous?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly if you think Jesus wouldn't appreciate a good pun. This tee sits firmly in the \"laughing with Him\" category.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works on everybody.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. DTG printing bonds the ink into the fabric. It holds up through washes without cracking or peeling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this just for Easter?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou can wear it year-round. Rizz is not seasonal.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the shirt made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight cotton with a relaxed, comfortable fit. No thin, see-through nonsense.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42019992076370,"sku":"JRizzen-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42019992109138,"sku":"JRizzen-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42019992141906,"sku":"JRizzen-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42019992174674,"sku":"JRizzen-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42019992207442,"sku":"JRizzen-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42019992240210,"sku":"JRizzen-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42019992272978,"sku":"JRizzen-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Jesus_Has_Rizzen_Funny_Easter_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481929"},{"product_id":"trade-wars-trump-xi-tariff-t-shirt-meme-shirt","title":"*NEW* Trade Wars Trump Xi Tariff Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Trade Wars Trump Xi Tariff Tee from Unethical Threads is the unholy crossover nobody requested and everybody needed. Trump, Xi, and Trudeau in full Star Wars gear, lightsabers drawn over import duties. Because if the global economy is going to implode, it might as well look cinematic.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears a Trade Wars shirt?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who can laugh at all sides and have a deep appreciation for terrible puns.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you've ever explained trade policy using movie references or sent a tariff meme to a group chat at 2 AM, this is your uniform. It hits whether you're Team Red, Team Blue, or Team \"I Just Think It's Funny.\" Nobody is safe on this tee, and that's exactly why it works.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a dryer sheet with a collar\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit from S to 4XL (yes, 4XL, because freedom has no size limit)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the colors don't bail after two washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs nicely with unsolicited opinions at Thanksgiving dinner\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eCan I give this as a gift without starting a political argument?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHonestly, this might be the only political shirt that doesn't start a fistfight.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe Trade Wars tee roasts everyone equally, which makes it weirdly diplomatic for something this unhinged. Works for the friend who live-tweets press conferences and the one who only follows politics through memes. Both will get it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the Trade Wars tee pick a political side?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. It roasts everyone equally. That's the whole point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this shirt come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or crack after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. DTG printing keeps the colors locked in for the long haul. Turn it inside out and wash cold if you want to be extra about it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an official Star Wars product?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. This is a parody. Lucasfilm did not sign off on this, and frankly we think that's funnier.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to a family dinner?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou can wear it anywhere. 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Feels substantial, not thin and flimsy like fast fashion garbage.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42168221827154,"sku":"74Blow-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42168221859922,"sku":"74Blow-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42168221892690,"sku":"74Blow-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42168221925458,"sku":"74Blow-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42168221958226,"sku":"74Blow-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42168221990994,"sku":"74Blow-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42168222023762,"sku":"74Blow-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42168222056530,"sku":"74Blow-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42168222089298,"sku":"74Blow-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42168222122066,"sku":"74Blow-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42168222154834,"sku":"74Blow-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42168222187602,"sku":"74Blow-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42168222220370,"sku":"74Blow-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42168222253138,"sku":"74Blow-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Call_Me_A_737_Cause_I_Got_A_Few_Screws_Loose_And_Sucked_A_Guy_Off_Black_T-Shirt.jpg?v=1759526723"},{"product_id":"evolution-bdsm-funny-inappropriate-shirt","title":"Evolution BDSM Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Evolution BDSM Tee from Unethical Threads picks up where Darwin left off. The classic ape-to-man progression keeps evolving, and apparently the final form of humanity involves leather, restraints, and a safe word.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who've made peace with the fact that civilization peaked at the invention of the ball gag. If your sense of humor runs darker than your browser history, this one's for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eKink-curious, kink-committed, or just here for the joke. It doesn't matter. You get it or you don't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that handles a beating (phrasing intentional)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, because collars are for other occasions\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay vivid wash after wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-shrunk fabric\u003c\/strong\u003e, no surprises after laundry day\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. Some people will laugh, some will pretend they don't get it, and a select few will clutch their pearls so hard they'll need a chiropractor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe Evolution BDSM Tee isn't trying to be subtle. If you're shopping here, you already knew that.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you know someone well enough to know their kinks, you know them well enough to gift this. Maybe skip the work Secret Santa though.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit that works for everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the print fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. DTG printing keeps the graphic locked in. Your evolutionary progress won't wash away.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTo some people, yes. It's a comedic take on the evolution chart with a bondage twist. If stick figures in leather bother someone, that's a them problem.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the fabric like?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight cotton with a crew neck. Solid without being stiff. 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