{"title":"Funny Coke Shirts","description":"\u003cstyle\u003e\n.collection-intro {margin: 0 0 15px 0;}\n.collection-intro p {margin: 0 0 15px 0; line-height: 1.6;}\n.trust-signals {background: #e8f5e9; padding: 12px; border-radius: 6px; text-align: center; font-size: 13px; margin: 10px 0 15px 0;}\n.desc-collapsed {max-height: 0; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease;}\n.desc-expanded {max-height: 5000px;}\n.read-more-btn {background: #3498db; color: white; border: none; padding: 10px 20px; border-radius: 5px; cursor: pointer; font-size: 14px; margin: 10px 0 20px 0; font-weight: 600;}\n.read-more-btn:hover {background: #2980b9;}\n\u003c\/style\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv class=\"collection-intro\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eExplore our funny coke shirts collection at Unethical Threads where inappropriate meets impeccable quality. These funny coke shirts are crafted for those who appreciate humor that pushes boundaries. Sizes S-4XL, free shipping on all orders.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"trust-signals\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e✓ Free Shipping On All Orders\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ 30-Day Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ Sizes S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cbutton class=\"read-more-btn\" onclick=\"var desc = document.getElementById('collection-desc-funny-coke-shirts'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-collapsed'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-expanded'); this.textContent = desc.classList.contains('desc-expanded') ? 'Show Less ▲' : 'Read More ▼';\"\u003eRead More ▼\u003c\/button\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv id=\"collection-desc-funny-coke-shirts\" class=\"desc-collapsed\"\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eAbout Our Funny Coke Shirts Collection\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePremium Quality \u0026amp; Features\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePerfect Occasions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eWhy Choose Unethical Threads\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRelated Collections:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-shirts\"\u003eComplete Funny Shirts Collection\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-shirts-for-uncles\"\u003eFunny Shirts For Uncles\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-matching-family-shirt-ideas\"\u003eFunny Matching Family Shirt Ideas\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"CollectionPage\",\n  \"name\": \"Funny Coke Shirts\",\n  \"url\": \"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-coke-shirts\"\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"less-naggin-more-gaggin-funny-trucker-hat","title":"Less Naggin More Gaggin Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Less Naggin More Gaggin hat from Unethical Threads is exactly what it sounds like. A trucker hat for the guy who said the quiet part out loud and decided to wear it on his head. You already know if this is for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eGuys who've been in a relationship long enough to find this hilarious. Also single guys who want to stay that way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the kind of hat that tells everyone at the cookout exactly where you stand. No further explanation needed. If you have to ask, it's probably not for you, but you clicked anyway, so here we are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured front panel\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds its shape (unlike your last argument)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMesh back panels\u003c\/strong\u003e for airflow, because you're going to need to cool off\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eSnapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e that adjusts to fit most heads and most egos\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-quality print\u003c\/strong\u003e that stays crisp wash after wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eComfortable all-day wear\u003c\/strong\u003e so you can commit to the bit from morning to last call\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOne of the best. If you know a guy who needs this hat, he probably really needs this hat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect for birthdays, bachelor parties, or just because you saw it and immediately thought of someone specific. Pair it with a straight face for maximum delivery.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. The print holds up through regular washing. Your patience might fade first, but the hat won't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. Snapback closure fits most head sizes comfortably.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. That's the whole point of putting it on your head.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou can wear it anywhere you're brave enough to. We just make the hat, we don't write your apology texts.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Light Pink \/ White \/ Light Pink","offer_id":42012853305426,"sku":"3863036_16750","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ White \/ Black","offer_id":42012853338194,"sku":"3863036_15908","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White","offer_id":42012853370962,"sku":"3863036_15905","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Less_Naggin_More_Gaggin_Funny_Inappropriate_Trucker_Hat_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481913"},{"product_id":"i-love-finger-painting-im-paint-inappropriate-couples-shirt","title":"I Love To Finger Paint I'm Paint Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Love To Finger Paint I'm Paint Tee from Unethical Threads is a matching couples shirt for people whose love language involves getting a little messy. If you have to ask what the joke is, this one isn't for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who've been together long enough that subtlety died years ago. This is the couple that holds hands in public and makes everyone else uncomfortable. The I Love To Finger Paint set is for partners who treat innuendo like a love language and gift-giving like a competitive sport.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that can handle whatever you put it through (we're talking laundry, relax)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e, because this joke works on every body type\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck, classic cut\u003c\/strong\u003e, nothing weird going on structurally\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay locked in, not peeling off after three washes like a cheap bumper sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMachine washable\u003c\/strong\u003e, though the memories of wearing this in public are permanent\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good couples gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a great couples gift. This is the move for anniversaries, Valentine's Day, or any time you want to remind your partner exactly what you bring to the table. It lands way harder than a candle or a gift card. Honestly, if your significant other doesn't laugh at this, you might have bigger problems than gift selection.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this come as a set or do I buy each shirt separately?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEach shirt is sold separately so you can grab the right size for each person. Pick up the I Love To Finger Paint tee here and the I'm Paint tee on its own listing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNope. DTG printing bonds the ink directly into the fabric. No cracking, no fading, no sad peeling situation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this appropriate to wear in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat depends entirely on your definition of appropriate. We say yes. Your in-laws might disagree.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42013145759826,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42013145792594,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42013145825362,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42013145858130,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42013145890898,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42013145923666,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42013145956434,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42013145989202,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42013146021970,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42013146054738,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42013146087506,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42013146120274,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42013146153042,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42013146185810,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Love_To_Finger_Paint_I_m_Paint_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481916"},{"product_id":"master-baiter-t-shirt-funny-inappropriate-fishing-fish-adult-humor-tee","title":"*NEW* Master Baiter Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe \u003cstrong\u003eMaster Baiter Tee\u003c\/strong\u003e from Unethical Threads is a fishing shirt for anyone who's spent a suspicious amount of time with a rod in their hand. It says exactly what you think it says, and no, we will not be apologizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFishermen. Dads. People whose sense of humor peaked at 14 and never looked back (that's a compliment). If you saw this and immediately thought of a specific person, that's the guy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBuy it for yourself or buy it for them. Either way, someone's wearing this to a family barbecue and it's going to be a whole thing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper handout from a 5K you didn't finish\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e because V-necks are for people with something to prove\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay loud through every wash. Your joke won't fade even if your dignity already has.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-shrunk fabric\u003c\/strong\u003e so it fits the same on day one and day one hundred\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOne of the best. The Master Baiter Tee is the kind of gag gift that actually gets worn, not shoved in a drawer after the party.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFather's Day, bachelor parties, birthdays, or the classic \"I saw this and thought of you.\" Works for anyone with a sense of humor and optional access to a body of water.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt run true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. It's a unisex relaxed fit available in S through 4XL. Order your normal size unless you want that extra-baggy fishing guide energy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. The DTG printing bonds ink directly into the fabric, so colors hold up wash after wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this appropriate to wear in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTechnically, yes. It says \"Master Baiter\" and has a fish on it. You're just really passionate about fishing. What people read into that is on them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gag gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAbsolutely. Works for Father's Day, bachelor parties, birthdays, or anytime you want to remind someone you know them a little too well.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDepends on where you work. Bait shop? Absolutely. Corporate office? That's between you and HR.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42016018071634,"sku":"TheBigBait-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42016018104402,"sku":"TheBigBait-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42016018137170,"sku":"TheBigBait-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42016018169938,"sku":"TheBigBait-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42016018202706,"sku":"TheBigBait-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42016018235474,"sku":"TheBigBait-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42016018268242,"sku":"TheBigBait-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42016018301010,"sku":"TheBigBait-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42016018333778,"sku":"TheBigBait-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42016018366546,"sku":"TheBigBait-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42016018399314,"sku":"TheBigBait-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42016018432082,"sku":"TheBigBait-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42016018464850,"sku":"TheBigBait-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42016018497618,"sku":"TheBigBait-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Master_Baiter_T_Shirt_Funny_Inappropriate_Fishing_Fish_Adult_Humor_Black_Tee.jpg?v=1762481925"},{"product_id":"it-was-only-a-kiss-judas-betraying-jesus-funny-easter-t-shirt","title":"It Was Only A Kiss - Judas Betraying Jesus Easter Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe It Was Only A Kiss tee from Unethical Threads takes the most dramatic betrayal in history and soundtracks it with The Killers. Judas, Jesus, and Mr. Brightside on one shirt. If you know, you know.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who know every word to Mr. Brightside and also sat through enough Sunday school to catch the reference immediately. It's the overlap of 2000s karaoke energy and childhood religious education. The kind of person who shows up to Easter brunch looking for a reaction. If your family group chat has ever gone silent because of something you wore, this one's for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper freebie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL (Judas-level betrayal comes in all sizes)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed for color that doesn't fade or crack, which is more than you can say for most friendships\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePreshrunk, so it fits the same on Easter and every Sunday after\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly, and that's kind of the point. Look, if someone at your Easter gathering can't handle a Mr. Brightside and Bible crossover, they were going to find something to be upset about anyway. This shirt doesn't punch down. It punches sideways, at a 2,000-year-old story that literally everyone knows. Wear it with confidence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually about Mr. Brightside?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's the Judas-Jesus kiss meets The Killers' biggest hit. Two betrayals, one shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the It Was Only A Kiss tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable across the board.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this appropriate for Easter?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDepends on your family. It's biblically accurate and musically on point. Whether that flies at your table is between you and your relatives.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. DTG printing keeps the colors locked in. Follow the care instructions and it'll hold up.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift for someone who loves memes?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf they've ever sent a Mr. Brightside meme or made a Judas joke, yes. This is their shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42016954581074,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42016954613842,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42016954646610,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42016954679378,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42016954712146,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42016954744914,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42016954777682,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/It_Was_Only_A_Kiss_Judas_Betraying_Jesus_Funny_Easter_Christian_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481928"},{"product_id":"i-would-dropkick-a-child-for-a-dr-pepper-graphic-inappropriate-humor-tee","title":"I Would Dropkick A Child For A Dr Pepper Graphic Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Would Dropkick A Child For A Dr Pepper tee from Unethical Threads is for the people who mean it. Not every soda, just Dr Pepper. You know your priorities, and this shirt makes sure everyone else does too.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who've been asked \"what's your favorite drink?\" and answered with an intensity that made the room uncomfortable. Dr Pepper loyalists don't do casual. If you've ever gotten genuinely mad at a restaurant for not carrying it, this was made for you. The kind of person who sees 23 flavors and thinks \"yeah, worth it.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds up better than your impulse control around a vending machine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e because some things don't need reinventing\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG (direct to garment) print\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay vivid long after your reputation doesn't\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-shrunk fabric\u003c\/strong\u003e because at least something in your life should be predictable\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you know someone whose entire personality is Dr Pepper, this is the gift. Stop buying them another case. They already have a fridge full. Give them something they can wear to Thanksgiving dinner that makes at least one relative deeply uncomfortable. It's thoughtful in the most unhinged way possible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt actually say \"dropkick a child\"?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. It says \"I Would Dropkick A Child For A Dr Pepper.\" That is the whole shirt. You've been warned.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works for basically everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this offend people?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAlmost certainly. That's not a bug, it's the entire point. If the people around you can't handle it, you might need different people.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the print going to crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. DTG printing keeps the colors locked in. This shirt will outlast most of your friendships.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eLegally, yes. Socially, that depends entirely on how much you care about what strangers think. 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A childhood movie reference that went somewhere it absolutely should not have gone. If you got it, you're our people.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople whose movie taste peaked in childhood and whose humor peaked somewhere worse.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe friend who ruins movie night with commentary nobody asked for. The person in your group chat who sends things that make you check over your shoulder. If you read \"Sid On My Face\" and immediately laughed, this was made for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not tissue paper\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit from S to 4XL (yes, your big friend is covered too)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck, because V-necks are for people who take themselves seriously\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the colors stay locked in, not fading out after a few washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePre-shrunk, because we know you're not reading care labels\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt might be the best gift you've ever given.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNothing says \"I know exactly who you are as a person\" like handing someone a shirt that says Sid On My Face. Perfect for birthdays, white elephants, or just a random Tuesday when you want to remind someone you're thinking of them in the worst way possible. They'll either love it or quietly reevaluate your friendship. Either way, memorable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Sid On My Face tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable on everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. The DTG printing keeps colors locked in. Wash it inside out on cold if you want to baby it, but it holds up fine.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt appropriate for work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat depends entirely on where you work. Office job? Probably not. Work from home? Nobody can stop you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the shirt made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eHeavyweight cotton. It's a solid, quality tee, not the thin stuff that falls apart after three wears.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I return it if my friend doesn't get the joke?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eGet a funnier friend. But yes, check our return policy if you need to.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42059585749074,"sku":"SMyFaces-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42059585781842,"sku":"SMyFaces-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42059585814610,"sku":"SMyFaces-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42059585847378,"sku":"SMyFaces-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42059585880146,"sku":"SMyFaces-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42059585912914,"sku":"SMyFaces-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42059585945682,"sku":"SMyFaces-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Sid_On_My_Face_Inappropriate_Adult_Humor_Gift_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482106"},{"product_id":"new-call-me-the-third-little-piggy-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* Call Me The Third Little Piggy Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Call Me The Third Little Piggy tee from Unethical Threads is what happens when a nursery rhyme meets someone who should not be left unsupervised around nursery rhymes. You already know the punchline. If you don't, this shirt isn't for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually wearing this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who peaked in middle school humor and are genuinely proud of it. The kind of person who sends screenshot-worthy texts to the group chat at 2 AM.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt lands hardest at cookouts, bar crawls, and anywhere your mom isn't. Though some of you will absolutely wear it in front of your mom, and honestly, respect.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper situation\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL (yes, the big kids eat too)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck because we're unhinged, not unfashionable\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the graphic stays vivid through countless washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSoft enough to sleep in when you pass out on someone's couch\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a fantastic gift if you want to be the funniest person at the party and also possibly never invited back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect for birthdays, white elephants, bachelor parties, or just because you saw it and immediately thought of someone specific. That instinct is correct. Trust it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Third Little Piggy shirt come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSizes S through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. The DTG print holds up. Wash inside out on cold if you want to baby it, but it handles a normal cycle just fine.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt appropriate for work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat depends entirely on where you work. If your boss laughs at dirty jokes, go for it. If HR sends weekly emails about the dress code, save it for the weekend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the shirt comfortable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eVery. Heavyweight cotton but not stiff. Comfortable from the first wear with no break-in period.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42063142748242,"sku":"CallMePiggy-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42063142781010,"sku":"CallMePiggy-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42063142813778,"sku":"CallMePiggy-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42063142846546,"sku":"CallMePiggy-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42063142879314,"sku":"CallMePiggy-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42063142912082,"sku":"CallMePiggy-Black-3XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42063142944850,"sku":"CallMePiggy-Black-4XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Call_Me_The_Third_Lil_Piggy_Cause_I_m_All_Bricked_Up_And_Ready_To_Get_Blown_Funny_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482118"},{"product_id":"i-would-dropkick-a-child-for-a-coca-cola-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* I Would Dropkick A Child For A Coca Cola Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Would Dropkick A Child For A Coca Cola tee is Unethical Threads doing what we do best: saying the quiet part loud, on a shirt. It's a Coca-Cola parody for people whose humor never left the group chat. Unhinged? Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think soda brand loyalty is a personality trait and child safety is negotiable. Your friend who says the worst thing at the barbecue and somehow still gets invited back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf your love for Coca-Cola borders on criminal, this is your uniform. The Dropkick series is one of our biggest lines for a reason. People see it, they get it, they want one for every brand they'd commit a minor felony over.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a see-through napkin\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S to 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e (yes, even the big soda enthusiasts are covered)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e because we're unhinged, not experimental\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG-printed graphic\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds its color wash after wash, no cracking or peeling\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eNo, you can't actually dropkick children. But you can look like you'd consider it.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. It's the funniest thing you can hand a Coca-Cola fan who doesn't scare easily.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDark humor lovers, meme-fluent coworkers, the friend who always takes the joke one step too far. If you know someone who'd read \"I Would Dropkick A Child For A Coca Cola\" and immediately say \"where do I buy this,\" you already know this is the move. Birthday, holiday, gag gift exchange, whatever. It lands.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the I Would Dropkick A Child For A Coca Cola shirt true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt runs unisex relaxed fit. If you want it fitted, go with your normal size. If you want that oversized look, size up one.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shirt get me in trouble?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat depends entirely on where you wear it and how fast you can run. We've seen everything from laughs to horrified double takes. Wear at your own risk.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the print quality like?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDTG printed directly into the fabric. The colors won't crack, peel, or fade into a sad ghost of themselves after a few washes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I return it if my family disowns me?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWe have a return policy, but we can't return your family's respect. Check our return page for the details.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this come in kids' sizes?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. And given the subject matter, that's probably for the best.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42140160950354,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42140160983122,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42140161015890,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42140161048658,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42140161081426,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42140161114194,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42140161146962,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Would_Dropkick_A_Child_For_A_Coca_Cola_Funny_Graphic_Gift_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1757010792"},{"product_id":"dr-pegger-funny-inappropriate-soda-gag-gift-t-shirt","title":"Dr Pegger Soda Parody Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Dr Pegger Soda Parody Tee from Unethical Threads takes a beloved soda brand and drags it somewhere deeply inappropriate. If you know, you know. If you don't, someone at the cookout will explain it while your aunt covers her mouth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think soda puns peaked when they got dirty. Couples who enjoy a public double take. Your friend who treats every group chat like an open mic night.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt isn't subtle, and neither are the people who buy it. It's the kind of tee that gets a slow head shake from your dad and an immediate \"where'd you get that\" from everyone else. If your humor lives in the gutter, welcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a napkin with a screen print\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, because we're classy like that\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors don't bail after three washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eYes, you can wear it to a barbecue. No, you probably shouldn't wear it to church.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf the recipient sends memes at 2 AM, absolutely.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect for birthdays, white elephants, or any occasion where you want to be remembered as \"that friend.\" It walks the line between thoughtful and unhinged, which is honestly the best kind of gift. Just make sure the person you're buying it for has a sense of humor. We can't help you if they don't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Dr Pegger tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. It's a unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfy no matter your build.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's DTG printed, meaning the ink is in the fabric, not sitting on top. Cold wash, tumble dry low, and it holds up.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an official Dr Pepper product?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. This is a parody. Dr Pepper did not approve this, and we respect that they probably never will.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat if the person I'm gifting this to doesn't get the joke?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThen you've learned something important about that person. 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No surprises there.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay vivid through every wash cycle (unlike your neurotypical friends' patience)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-shrunk.\u003c\/strong\u003e We planned ahead so you don't have to.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually offensive?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDepends who you ask. The joke is affectionate, not punching down. It's clever wordplay, and most people on the spectrum seem to love it. The only folks who get upset are the ones who get upset at everything. You probably already know which group you fall into.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good autism awareness shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's autism awareness with a pulse. No puzzle pieces, no sad blue lighting. 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