{"title":"Funny Cowgirl Shirts","description":"\u003cstyle\u003e\n.collection-intro {margin: 0 0 15px 0;}\n.collection-intro p {margin: 0 0 15px 0; line-height: 1.6;}\n.trust-signals {background: #e8f5e9; padding: 12px; border-radius: 6px; text-align: center; font-size: 13px; margin: 10px 0 15px 0;}\n.desc-collapsed {max-height: 0; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease;}\n.desc-expanded {max-height: 5000px;}\n.read-more-btn {background: #3498db; color: white; border: none; padding: 10px 20px; border-radius: 5px; cursor: pointer; font-size: 14px; margin: 10px 0 20px 0; font-weight: 600;}\n.read-more-btn:hover {background: #2980b9;}\n\u003c\/style\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv class=\"collection-intro\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWelcome to Unethical Threads' funny cowgirl shirts collection where humor meets premium craftsmanship. Our funny cowgirl shirts feature original designs that refuse to play it safe, guaranteed to spark conversations. Available in sizes S-4XL with fast shipping and a 30-day satisfaction guarantee.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"trust-signals\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e✓ Free Shipping On All Orders\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ 30-Day Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ Sizes S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cbutton class=\"read-more-btn\" onclick=\"var desc = document.getElementById('collection-desc-funny-cowgirl-shirts'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-collapsed'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-expanded'); this.textContent = desc.classList.contains('desc-expanded') ? 'Show Less ▲' : 'Read More ▼';\"\u003eRead More ▼\u003c\/button\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv id=\"collection-desc-funny-cowgirl-shirts\" class=\"desc-collapsed\"\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eAbout Our Funny Cowgirl Shirts Collection\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePremium Quality \u0026amp; Features\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePerfect Occasions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eWhy Choose Unethical Threads\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRelated Collections:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-shirts\"\u003eComplete Funny Shirts Collection\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-bigfoot-t-shirts\"\u003eFunny Bigfoot T Shirts\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-brand-t-shirts\"\u003eFunny Brand T Shirts\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"CollectionPage\",\n  \"name\": \"Funny Cowgirl Shirts\",\n  \"url\": \"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-cowgirl-shirts\"\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"autism-powered-fuck-machine-hat","title":"Autism Powered Fuck Machine Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Autism Powered Fuck Machine Hat from Unethical Threads is for people who turned their diagnosis into a flex and refuse to be quiet about it. Structured cotton front, mesh back, and a statement that hits before you even open your mouth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually wearing this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNeurodivergent people who own it completely. The ones who made peace with the way their brain works and decided the rest of the world can keep up or get out of the way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou know the friend who hyperfocused on something for 14 hours straight and emerged looking slightly feral? The one who can drop encyclopedic knowledge on their niche interest but forgot to eat lunch? That person already has this hat in their cart.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured cotton front panels\u003c\/strong\u003e that keep the message crisp and readable\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e, because your brain already runs hot enough\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e that fits most head sizes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCurved bill\u003c\/strong\u003e, pre-shaped so you're ready to go right out of the box\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDurable print\u003c\/strong\u003e that won't crack, peel, or fade when you inevitably wear this three days in a row\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eCan I give this as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly if you actually know the person. This is a gift for someone who already makes these jokes about themselves, not a random grab for a white elephant exchange.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor the right person (your neurodivergent partner, sibling, best friend), this is the kind of gift that gets worn immediately and often. They'll think of you every time someone in public does a visible double take.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTo some people, absolutely. To the people it's made for, it's the funniest thing they own. Know your audience.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat size is this trucker hat?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOne size fits most. The adjustable snapback closure in the back handles the rest.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or crack?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. The print is made to hold up through regular washing. Just skip the dryer to keep it looking its best.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this actually for autistic people?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's for anyone who thinks it's funny. But it hits different when it's your own joke to make.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Light Pink \/ White \/ Light Pink","offer_id":42012844949586,"sku":"2311174_16750","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ White \/ Black","offer_id":42012844982354,"sku":"2311174_15908","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Royal \/ Red","offer_id":42012845015122,"sku":"2311174_15909","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White","offer_id":42012845047890,"sku":"2311174_15905","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/foam-trucker-hat-light-pink-white-light-pink-one-size-back-67ed525ae541a.jpg?v=1762481906"},{"product_id":"strip-club-veteran-funny-inappropriate-military-gift-hat","title":"Strip Club Veteran Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Strip Club Veteran hat is for the guy who doesn't just have stories, he has a permanent VIP section in his memory. This Unethical Threads trucker hat announces your distinguished service record without saying a word. Well, technically it says the words for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe guys who've earned their stripes. Bachelor party survivors, regulars who know the Tuesday lunch special, and anyone whose friend group has at least one really good lawyer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis hat doesn't need context. If you know, you know. And if you don't, you probably shouldn't ask. It's the kind of headwear that tells a whole story before you even open your mouth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured front panel with mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e for breathability during those long nights out\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most heads (and most egos)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eVivid printed design\u003c\/strong\u003e that won't fade, crack, or snitch on you\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eComfortable all-day fit\u003c\/strong\u003e whether you're at the barbecue or the after-party\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePairs well\u003c\/strong\u003e with a cold beer and questionable life choices\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the perfect gift. Specifically for the friend everyone has one of.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou know the one. He's got the stories nobody believes until they see the photos. Birthdays, bachelor parties, White Elephant, or just a random Tuesday because you saw it and thought of him. The Strip Club Veteran hat is less of a gift and more of an award ceremony.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e Yes. Snapback closure fits most head sizes comfortably.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print hold up?\u003c\/strong\u003e The design is printed to last through washes, sun, and whatever else you put this hat through.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e You can. Whether you should is between you and your sense of shame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an actual military hat?\u003c\/strong\u003e No. This is a trucker hat for veterans of a very different kind of service.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the return policy?\u003c\/strong\u003e Check our return policy page, but honestly, nobody sends this one back.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42012849373266,"sku":"4829162_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Strip_Club_Veteran_Funny_Inappropriate_Trucker_Hat_Military_Gift_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481911"},{"product_id":"free-mustache-rides-funny-inappropriate-trucker-hat","title":"Free Mustache Rides Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Free Mustache Rides Hat from Unethical Threads is a trucker hat for people who gave up on subtlety a long time ago. It says exactly what you think it says. Wear it to the cookout, the bar, or anywhere you want to thin out your social circle a little.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho Actually Wears This?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople whose sense of humor peaked in a good way. This is the hat for the guy at the barbecue who everyone secretly likes best because he quit pretending to be appropriate years ago.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you've ever gotten a laugh and a head shake in the same moment, you already know the feeling. The Free Mustache Rides Hat just makes it official.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured foam front panels\u003c\/strong\u003e with a classic trucker profile that actually holds its shape\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e so your head doesn't pay the price for your personality\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e, one size fits most heads (even the big ones)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eVivid printed design\u003c\/strong\u003e that won't fade, crack, or chicken out after a few washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-curved bill\u003c\/strong\u003e for that broken-in look from day one\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs This a Good Gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the best gift if you actually know the person.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFather's Day, birthdays, bachelor parties, or just because you saw it and immediately thought of someone specific. That reaction is the whole point. If you're buying it for a coworker, make sure HR likes you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the Free Mustache Rides Hat actually a trucker hat?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. Classic trucker style with structured foam front panels, mesh back, and an adjustable snapback closure.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or peel off?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNope. The design is printed to last through regular wear and washing. It's not going anywhere.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat size does this hat fit?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eOne size fits most. The adjustable snapback handles the range, so unless your head is genuinely unusual, you're covered.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou can. Whether you should depends entirely on your comfort level with strangers reading your hat and forming opinions about you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat appropriate for work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat depends on where you work. If your boss laughs at it, you're fine. If they don't, well, it was nice working there.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":42012853600338,"sku":"4627643_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red","offer_id":42012853633106,"sku":"4627643_15906","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Free_Mustache_Rides_Funny_Mesh_Trucker_Hat_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481914"},{"product_id":"im-paint-i-love-to-finger-paint-t-shirt","title":"I'm Paint Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I'm Paint tee from Unethical Threads is one half of our most unhinged couples set. You wear this. Your person wears \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/i-love-finger-painting-im-paint-inappropriate-couples-shirt\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"I Love To Finger Paint Shirt\"\u003eI Love To Finger Paint\u003c\/a\u003e. Together you walk into brunch and let the room figure it out.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's Wearing This One?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe one who's Paint, obviously. This is the other half of the set, paired with our I Love To Finger Paint tee.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOne of you is the artist, one of you is the canvas. We're not here to judge who's who. Wear them to a party, a cookout, or your in-laws' anniversary dinner if you're feeling particularly brave.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a free promo tee\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the colors don't bail after three washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs with our I Love To Finger Paint tee (sold separately, relationships also sold separately)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs This Actually a Good Couples Gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHonestly, yes. It's the kind of gift that says \"I know exactly what we are and I'm not sorry about it.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWay better than matching pajamas. Way more memorable than a candle. If your relationship can't handle this shirt, that's a different conversation entirely.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt come as a set with the Finger Paint tee?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo, each shirt is sold separately. Grab the I Love To Finger Paint tee too if you want the full effect.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the I'm Paint tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable on everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or crack after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNope. DTG printing means the design is part of the fabric, not sitting on top of it. Wash normally and skip the dryer abuse.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this by itself or does it only work as a pair?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt works solo if you want people spending all day trying to figure out what \"I'm Paint\" means. Which, honestly, is also pretty funny.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42013158834258,"sku":"Painter-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42013158867026,"sku":"Painter-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42013158899794,"sku":"Painter-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42013158932562,"sku":"Painter-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42013158965330,"sku":"Painter-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42013158998098,"sku":"Painter-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42013159030866,"sku":"Painter-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42013159063634,"sku":"Painter-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42013159096402,"sku":"Painter-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42013159129170,"sku":"Painter-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42013159161938,"sku":"Painter-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42013159194706,"sku":"Painter-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42013159227474,"sku":"Painter-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42013159260242,"sku":"Painter-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_m_Paint_I_Love_To_Finger_Paint_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481916"},{"product_id":"it-was-only-a-kiss-judas-betraying-jesus-funny-easter-t-shirt","title":"It Was Only A Kiss - Judas Betraying Jesus Easter Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe It Was Only A Kiss tee from Unethical Threads takes the most dramatic betrayal in history and soundtracks it with The Killers. Judas, Jesus, and Mr. Brightside on one shirt. If you know, you know.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who know every word to Mr. Brightside and also sat through enough Sunday school to catch the reference immediately. It's the overlap of 2000s karaoke energy and childhood religious education. The kind of person who shows up to Easter brunch looking for a reaction. If your family group chat has ever gone silent because of something you wore, this one's for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper freebie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL (Judas-level betrayal comes in all sizes)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed for color that doesn't fade or crack, which is more than you can say for most friendships\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePreshrunk, so it fits the same on Easter and every Sunday after\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly, and that's kind of the point. Look, if someone at your Easter gathering can't handle a Mr. Brightside and Bible crossover, they were going to find something to be upset about anyway. This shirt doesn't punch down. It punches sideways, at a 2,000-year-old story that literally everyone knows. Wear it with confidence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually about Mr. Brightside?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's the Judas-Jesus kiss meets The Killers' biggest hit. Two betrayals, one shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the It Was Only A Kiss tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable across the board.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this appropriate for Easter?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDepends on your family. It's biblically accurate and musically on point. Whether that flies at your table is between you and your relatives.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. DTG printing keeps the colors locked in. Follow the care instructions and it'll hold up.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift for someone who loves memes?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf they've ever sent a Mr. Brightside meme or made a Judas joke, yes. This is their shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42016954581074,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42016954613842,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42016954646610,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42016954679378,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42016954712146,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42016954744914,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42016954777682,"sku":"ItWasOnly-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/It_Was_Only_A_Kiss_Judas_Betraying_Jesus_Funny_Easter_Christian_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481928"},{"product_id":"im-peace-i-come-in-peace-funny-couples-matching-tee","title":"I'm Peace Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I'm Peace tee is one half of a matching set that doesn't need explaining. If you know, you know. From Unethical Threads, for couples who'd rather make people uncomfortable than wear something boring.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's wearing the other half?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYour other half. Obviously. The I'm Peace tee pairs with the \"I Come In Peace\" tee for the kind of couples outfit that gets you disinvited from family brunch. Wear them to a party, a bar, a baby shower you weren't really invited to. The reactions are the whole point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not that see-through tissue-paper stuff\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S to 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e, because inappropriate humor has no size limit\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, because we're classy like that\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e for color that survives your questionable life choices (and the washing machine)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-shrunk\u003c\/strong\u003e so it fits the same after the first wash as it did when you impulse-bought it at 2 AM\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a perfect gift if you and your partner share the same unhinged sense of humor. It's a terrible gift if you'd have to explain it. Know your audience.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is peak \"anniversary present that costs under $40 but gets more laughs than anything else you've ever bought.\" Just make sure you grab both halves of the set.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the I'm Peace tee come with the matching shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo, each shirt is sold separately. Grab the I Come In Peace tee too if you want the full set.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNope. DTG printing means the design is embedded in the fabric, not sitting on top of it. Wash inside out on cold if you want to be extra careful, but it holds up.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt appropriate for family events?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eProbably not. That's the point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this without the matching shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSure, but it hits harder as a set. On its own it's a solid shirt. 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It's a team sport.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with a screen print\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit from S to 4XL, because good jokes come in every size\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck, because obviously\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG (direct-to-garment) print that holds its color through wash cycles, not just the first three\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePre-shrunk so it still fits after laundry day\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. The I Love To Blow Bubbles and I'm Bubbles combo is the kind of gift that gets a reaction at the party and actually gets worn afterward. Anniversary, Valentine's Day, \"just because you think it's funny.\" All valid reasons.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is the couples shirt set for people who think matching outfits are cringe unless the outfit is also a dirty joke.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDo the I Love To Blow Bubbles and I'm Bubbles shirts come as a set?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThey're sold separately so you can pick the right size for each person. Grab both to complete the joke.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this shirt come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe DTG print holds up through the wash. Turn it inside out and wash cold if you want to baby it, but it's not fragile.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt appropriate for family gatherings?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat depends entirely on your family. You know them better than we do.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42025734078546,"sku":"BlowBubbles-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42025734111314,"sku":"BlowBubbles-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42025734144082,"sku":"BlowBubbles-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42025734176850,"sku":"BlowBubbles-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42025734209618,"sku":"BlowBubbles-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42025734242386,"sku":"BlowBubbles-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42025734275154,"sku":"BlowBubbles-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42025734307922,"sku":"BlowBubbles-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42025734340690,"sku":"BlowBubbles-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42025734373458,"sku":"BlowBubbles-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42025734406226,"sku":"BlowBubbles-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42025734438994,"sku":"BlowBubbles-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42025734471762,"sku":"BlowBubbles-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42025734504530,"sku":"BlowBubbles-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Love_To_Blow_Bubbles_I_m_Bubbles_Funny_Couples_Shirt_Black.jpg?v=1762481970"},{"product_id":"pope-leo-xiv-o-block-chicago-funny-meme-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* Pope Leo XIV O Block Chicago Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Pope Leo XIV O Block Chicago Tee from Unethical Threads is exactly what happens when the first American pope picks up his Chicago roots and the internet loses its mind. Vatican meets the South Side. If you know, you know.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this just for Chicago people?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNot even close. You don't need to know a single thing about O Block to appreciate the absolute chaos of the pope posted up with the boys. Chicago natives will catch the deep cut, everyone else will appreciate the audacity. Either way, this shirt hits.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a napkin with sleeves\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e from S to 4XL (yes, we accommodate the whole congregation)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, because the pope would want it that way\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e directly into the fabric, so the colors don't fade when you actually wash it\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-shrunk\u003c\/strong\u003e, meaning your tee won't become a crop top after one spin cycle\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. That's kind of the whole point of wearing Unethical Threads. The pope is from Chicago, the meme wrote itself, and we just had the good sense to put it on cotton. If someone at brunch clutches their pearls, that sounds like a them problem.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt run true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eRuns true. It's a relaxed unisex fit, so if you're between sizes, either works. Check the size chart to get specific.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the print going to crack or peel?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. It's DTG printed directly into the fabric, not some iron-on from 2004. Colors hold up through the wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this actually about Pope Leo XIV?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. The first American pope, Robert Prevost, took the name Leo XIV. He's from Chicago. The internet did what it does. We made the shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does the shirt feel like?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThick heavyweight cotton. Not the tissue-paper stuff you get at tourist shops. This one actually holds its shape.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to church?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eTechnically, yes. We can't stop you and honestly wouldn't want to.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42043284717650,"sku":"Poblock-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42043284750418,"sku":"Poblock-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42043284783186,"sku":"Poblock-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42043284815954,"sku":"Poblock-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42043284848722,"sku":"Poblock-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42043284881490,"sku":"Poblock-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42043284914258,"sku":"Poblock-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/UNETHICALTHREADSWATERMARK.png?v=1762482093"},{"product_id":"new-i-would-dropkick-a-child-for-a-costco-hotdog-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* I Would Dropkick A Child For A Costco Hotdog Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Would Dropkick A Child For A Costco Hotdog tee from Unethical Threads says what everyone in the food court is already thinking. That $1.50 combo is worth defending with violence. This is your public oath of loyalty to the greatest deal in American food.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who understand that a Costco membership is a personality trait. If you've ever gotten emotional about a hotdog and soda for a dollar fifty, this shirt is basically your autobiography.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's also for the friend in your group who says the thing everyone else was too polite to say out loud. You know who you are. Your family knows too, and they're tired.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a shirt, not a napkin you'd steal from the Costco food court\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e. Big hotdog energy comes in all sizes.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, because we have some standards\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG print\u003c\/strong\u003e that bonds ink directly to the fabric. The color holds up wash after wash, kind of like your commitment to that hotdog.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the perfect gift for someone you know well enough to insult. If you have to ask whether they'd find this funny, they're not the right person.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBut if you immediately thought of someone specific when you saw this, you already know the answer. Buy it. They'll wear it to Costco. It will be their whole identity for a week.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's pre-shrunk heavyweight cotton. Wash it however you want, it holds up.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes do you carry?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDTG printing bonds the ink directly into the fabric fibers. The print stays put through regular washing. Your Costco devotion won't peel off.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this about the actual Costco hotdog?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. The $1.50 hotdog and soda combo. The one they've kept at that price since 1985. 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Priorities.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42046129471570,"sku":"DaDogC-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42046129504338,"sku":"DaDogC-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42046129537106,"sku":"DaDogC-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42046129569874,"sku":"DaDogC-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42046129602642,"sku":"DaDogC-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42046129635410,"sku":"DaDogC-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42046129668178,"sku":"DaDogC-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Would_Dropkick_A_Child_For_A_Costco_Hotdog_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482094"},{"product_id":"new-i-would-dropkick-a-child-for-a-labubu-funny-viral-tee","title":"*NEW* I Would Dropkick A Child For A Labubu Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Would Dropkick A Child For A Labubu tee is Unethical Threads at full volume. If you've ever refreshed a product page 400 times, elbowed someone at a pop-up, or considered crimes for a blind box, this shirt just gets it. Wear the confession.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnyone deep enough in the Labubu rabbit hole to know their spending is no longer rational. Collectors, resellers, people who have restock notifications turned on at 3 a.m.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you've ever had to explain to a concerned loved one why you need another one, you already know this shirt is yours. It's not a cry for help. It's a lifestyle update.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that feels like it cost more than your last blind box (it didn't)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed for color that stays vivid through every wash cycle you keep forgetting to run\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns true to size, so order your usual and get back to refreshing that restock page\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift for a Labubu collector?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect gift, mostly because they've already spent all their own money on Labubu.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight tee, solid fit, and a joke they'll immediately understand. Hand it over at the next restock line and watch them lose it. It's cheaper than actually buying them a Labubu, and honestly, more thoughtful.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the I Would Dropkick A Child For A Labubu tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Plenty of room for your growing Labubu collection and your growing sense of shame.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. DTG printing keeps the colors locked in. Your commitment to chaos should last just as long.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually soft?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight cotton, but not stiff. Think substantial, not scratchy. You'll want to wear it, not just post in it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this around kids?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTechnically, yes. Whether you should is between you and your moral compass. We just make the shirts.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an official Labubu product?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. This is an Unethical Threads original. We're not affiliated with Pop Mart or Labubu. We just understand the obsession.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42065016225874,"sku":"DropBu-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42065016258642,"sku":"DropBu-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42065016291410,"sku":"DropBu-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42065016324178,"sku":"DropBu-White-XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42065016356946,"sku":"DropBu-White-2XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42065016389714,"sku":"DropBu-White-3XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42065016422482,"sku":"DropBu-White-4XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Would_Dropkick_A_Child_For_A_Labubu_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482120"},{"product_id":"lajewbu-labubu-parody-funny-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* Lajewbu Labubu Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Lajewbu tee from Unethical Threads takes the Labubu obsession and runs it straight through the chosen people filter. If you've been deep in the Labubu meme trenches, this one needs no explanation. If you haven't, honestly, keep scrolling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople whose group chats would get them investigated. The Lajewbu hits hardest with the chronically online crowd who saw the Labubu craze and immediately thought \"this needs to be more offensive.\" You collect niche memes the way normal people collect hobbies, and your wardrobe should reflect that.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that doesn't feel like a tissue paper freebie from a 5K you didn't run\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e from S to 4XL, because bad taste comes in every size\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, classic cut, no surprises\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e for color that outlasts your friendships\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMachine washable\u003c\/strong\u003e (your browser history, however, is not)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this get me in trouble?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProbably. That's kind of the whole deal. The Lajewbu isn't for people who play it safe. Wear it around people who get dark humor, or wear it around people who don't and enjoy the chaos.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's not for the easily rattled. If the name alone made you gasp, this probably isn't your brand. We have other shirts. They're also offensive.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat is a Labubu?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA collectible doll that took over the internet. If you don't already know, the joke on this shirt loses about 80% of its power. Google it, then come back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMinimal shrinkage if you follow care instructions. Cold wash, tumble dry low. Treat it better than you treat your relationships.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes are available?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Everyone's welcome at this particular table.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly if you know the person's sense of humor. This is a \"you get it or you don't\" kind of shirt. Don't gift it to a coworker unless you're fine with an HR meeting.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42084250189906,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42084250419282,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42084250452050,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42084250484818,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42084250517586,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42084250550354,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42084250583122,"sku":"Jewbu-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Lajewbu_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482272"},{"product_id":"im-beersexual-funny-beer-drinking-lgbtq-parody-shirt","title":"*NEW* I'm Beersexual Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I'm Beersexual tee from Unethical Threads is for anyone who's ever been asked about their type and answered \"cold, domestic, and available.\" It's a drinking shirt, an identity crisis, and a cry for help all on one piece of heavyweight cotton.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEveryone from the guy who brings a cooler to every event to the person whose dating profile says \"IPA personality, Bud Light budget.\" If you've ever described a beer as \"crisp\" with the same reverence other people reserve for their firstborn, this was designed for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt also works if you just think beer reveals are better than gender reveals. No judgment here. Okay, a little judgment.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper situation\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e (yes, the big boys eat too)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e because V-necks are for job interviews\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG print\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors hold up even after your questionable laundry habits\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMachine washable\u003c\/strong\u003e, which is more than we can say for your reputation after wearing this\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's either the best gift someone's ever gotten or the reason you get uninvited from the family group chat. There is no middle ground.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf the person on your list has ever shotgunned a beer at an inappropriate time, you're golden. Great for birthdays, bachelor parties, or any event where someone's going to end up on a table.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the I'm Beersexual tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works whether you're built like a light beer or a stout.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eHeavyweight cotton holds its shape. Cold wash, tumble dry low, and it'll outlast most of your friendships.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the print going to crack or peel?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. DTG printing soaks the ink into the fabric instead of sitting on top. It holds up through washes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDepends where you work. Brewery, absolutely. Church, maybe just casual Friday. HR department, probably not but honestly who cares.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's a beer joke. If someone gets offended by a shirt about loving beer, that's a them problem, not a you problem.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42160639180882,"sku":"Beeruals-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42160639213650,"sku":"Beeruals-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42160639246418,"sku":"Beeruals-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42160639279186,"sku":"Beeruals-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42160639311954,"sku":"Beeruals-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42160639344722,"sku":"Beeruals-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42160639377490,"sku":"Beeruals-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42160639410258,"sku":"Beeruals-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42160639443026,"sku":"Beeruals-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42160639475794,"sku":"Beeruals-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42160639508562,"sku":"Beeruals-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42160639541330,"sku":"Beeruals-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42160639574098,"sku":"Beeruals-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42160639606866,"sku":"Beeruals-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_m_Beersexual_Funny_Beer_Drinking_Shirt.jpg?v=1758825008"},{"product_id":"jew-jitsu-funny-jewish-bjj-meme-humor-shirt","title":"Jew Jitsu Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Jew Jitsu Tee from Unethical Threads is what happens when the chosen people choose violence. If you train, you already get it. If you don't, you still get it, because this pun does all the heavy lifting for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnyone who's been told they have a great sense of humor and took it as a personality trait. BJJ guys who want their wardrobe to match their ground game energy, comedy nerds, and Jewish friends who've been waiting for merch at the exact intersection of grappling and guilt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is the shirt that lives in your gym bag and earns more compliments than your actual technique.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that won't disintegrate after a few wash cycles\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL, because grapplers come in every weight class\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck (no weird collars happening here)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the colors outlast your cardio\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePre-shrunk, because surprises belong on the mat, not in the dryer\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually offensive?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a pun. A really good one, but still a pun.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you can't laugh at wordplay this clean, you might be overthinking it. The people who actually train think it's hilarious. The people who don't train were never buying a BJJ shirt anyway. Everyone in the middle just wants to know where you got it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the Jew Jitsu Tee run true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. It's a relaxed unisex fit, so it's comfortable without being baggy. Check the size chart if you're between sizes, but most people grab their usual.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. DTG printing means the design stays sharp no matter how many times you wash it. Your gym attendance might fade, but the shirt won't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I train in this shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTechnically yes, but save it for off the mat. Gi or rashguard for rolling, Jew Jitsu Tee for everything else.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf the person trains BJJ or appreciates a sharp pun, absolutely. If they're easily offended, maybe grab them a candle instead.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes are available?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Plenty of room whether you're a featherweight or a super heavyweight.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42160659365970,"sku":"Jejiusu-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42160659398738,"sku":"Jejiusu-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42160659431506,"sku":"Jejiusu-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42160659464274,"sku":"Jejiusu-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42160659497042,"sku":"Jejiusu-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42160659529810,"sku":"Jejiusu-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42160659562578,"sku":"Jejiusu-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42160659595346,"sku":"Jejiusu-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42160659628114,"sku":"Jejiusu-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42160659660882,"sku":"Jejiusu-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42160659693650,"sku":"Jejiusu-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42160659726418,"sku":"Jejiusu-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42160659759186,"sku":"Jejiusu-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42160659791954,"sku":"Jejiusu-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Jew_Jitsu_Shirt.jpg?v=1758825705"},{"product_id":"its-finally-autism-autumm-parody-tee","title":"It's Finally Autism Autumm Parody Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe It's Finally Autism Autumm parody tee from Unethical Threads is for everyone who saw those cozy fall posts and immediately thought \"this needs to be worse.\" If your brain has been fully cooked by the internet, congratulations. This is your seasonal uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who have been online too long and have no plans to recover.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis one hit hard with the chronically online crowd. The type who see a pumpkin spice latte and instantly think of the worst possible caption. You know who you are. Your friends know too, and they stopped being surprised a long time ago.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with a screen print\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e from S to 4XL, because brainrot doesn't discriminate by body type\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e classic cut\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay locked in and won't ghost you after a few washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePairs well with\u003c\/strong\u003e pumpkin spice, leaf piles, and deeply questionable life choices\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this going to offend someone?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. That's not a bug, it's the whole product.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you're the type who needs to poll the group chat before buying a shirt, this probably isn't for you. But if you saw \"It's Finally Autism\" and laughed before you could stop yourself, welcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an actual autism awareness shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. It's a parody of the \"It's Finally Autumn\" trend. The humor is internet brainrot, not a PSA.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes are available?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit that works for everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print hold up in the wash?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. DTG printed so the colors stay put. Just follow the care instructions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou can. Whether you should is between you and your anxiety.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf the person would send this meme in a group chat unprompted, yes. 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