{"title":"Funny Designer T Shirts","description":"\u003cstyle\u003e\n.collection-intro {margin: 0 0 15px 0;}\n.collection-intro p {margin: 0 0 15px 0; line-height: 1.6;}\n.trust-signals {background: #e8f5e9; padding: 12px; border-radius: 6px; text-align: center; font-size: 13px; margin: 10px 0 15px 0;}\n.desc-collapsed {max-height: 0; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease;}\n.desc-expanded {max-height: 5000px;}\n.read-more-btn {background: #3498db; color: white; border: none; padding: 10px 20px; border-radius: 5px; cursor: pointer; font-size: 14px; margin: 10px 0 20px 0; font-weight: 600;}\n.read-more-btn:hover {background: #2980b9;}\n\u003c\/style\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv class=\"collection-intro\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eUnethical Threads presents our funny designer t shirts collection - where offensive meets fashionable. Each design delivers laughs and premium comfort. Shop funny designer t shirts today - sizes S-4XL, 30-day satisfaction guarantee.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"trust-signals\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e✓ Free Shipping On All Orders\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ 30-Day Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ Sizes S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cbutton class=\"read-more-btn\" onclick=\"var desc = document.getElementById('collection-desc-funny-designer-t-shirts'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-collapsed'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-expanded'); this.textContent = desc.classList.contains('desc-expanded') ? 'Show Less ▲' : 'Read More ▼';\"\u003eRead More ▼\u003c\/button\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv id=\"collection-desc-funny-designer-t-shirts\" class=\"desc-collapsed\"\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eAbout Our Funny Designer T Shirts Collection\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePremium Quality \u0026amp; Features\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePerfect Occasions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eWhy Choose Unethical Threads\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRelated Collections:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-shirts\"\u003eComplete Funny Shirts Collection\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-graphic-designer-t-shirts\"\u003eFunny Graphic Designer T-Shirts\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-anal-shirt\"\u003eFunny Anal Shirt\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"CollectionPage\",\n  \"name\": \"Funny Designer T Shirts\",\n  \"url\": \"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-designer-t-shirts\"\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"i-dont-need-fun-to-have-alcohol-funny-drinking-beer-trucker-hat","title":"I Don't Need Fun To Have Alcohol Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Don't Need Fun To Have Alcohol Hat from Unethical Threads is a trucker hat for anyone who settled the fun vs. alcohol debate years ago. Alcohol won. This snapback just makes it official.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears a drinking hat unironically?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who stopped pretending they drink for the taste somewhere around their mid-twenties.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is the hat you throw on for a barbecue, a tailgate, or your backyard at 2pm on a Tuesday. It tells everyone exactly where you stand without you having to say a word. Honestly, it's doing you a favor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured foam front\u003c\/strong\u003e with cotton twill face, so the print stays crisp even when you don't\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e because nobody wants a sweaty head on top of a hangover\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most heads comfortably (yes, even yours)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eFull-color print\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds up through regular washes and the occasional spill\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eOne size fits most.\u003c\/strong\u003e If your head is truly enormous, that's between you and genetics\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt might be the best gift you buy all year.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis hat is perfect for anyone who's ever said \"I'm not an alcoholic, I'm a connoisseur\" with a straight face. Works for birthdays, white elephants, bachelor parties, or just because you saw it and immediately thought of someone specific. That person knows who they are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the print hold up?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. Full-color print that holds up through regular washes. Treat it like you'd treat any hat you actually like.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSnapback closure in the back. One size fits most adults comfortably.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProbably. But the kind of person offended by a drinking hat wasn't going to be fun at the party anyway.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDepends entirely on where you work and how much you value HR's opinion of you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the hat made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eStructured foam front with cotton twill and breathable mesh back panels. Comfortable enough to forget you're wearing it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Royal \/ Red","offer_id":42012843704402,"sku":"2397894_15909","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ White \/ Black","offer_id":42012843671634,"sku":"2397894_15908","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black","offer_id":42012843638866,"sku":"2397894_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Don_t_Need_Fun_To_Have_Alcohol_Funny_Drinking_Beer_Trucker_Hat_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481903"},{"product_id":"i-eat-drywall-funny-weird-trucker-hat","title":"I Eat Drywall Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Eat Drywall Hat from Unethical Threads is a trucker hat for people whose sense of humor peaked somewhere between \"chaotic\" and \"concerning.\" It says what it says. You either get it or you're Googling it right now, and both outcomes are funny.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears a hat that says I Eat Drywall?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eContractors, gym bros, and anyone who peaked in a group chat. This is the hat equivalent of a personality test nobody asked you to take.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf someone at Home Depot nods at you while you're wearing this, that's your new best friend. You don't choose the drywall life, but you can certainly advertise it on your forehead.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured cotton front panels\u003c\/strong\u003e that hold the absurdity upright\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e so your head gets airflow even when your decisions don't deserve respect\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most skulls, even the thick ones\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePrinted design that holds up\u003c\/strong\u003e through washes and questionable life choices\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic curved brim\u003c\/strong\u003e for that \"I swear I'm normal\" silhouette\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eDoes this work as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a perfect gift if you know the person well enough to insult them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBirthday, White Elephant, \"sorry about what I said at Thanksgiving,\" whatever the occasion. The I Eat Drywall Hat works because it requires no explanation and offers none. Hand it over. Watch their face. That's the whole gift.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the I Eat Drywall Hat fit big heads?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe snapback closure adjusts to fit most head sizes. If your head is truly enormous, you probably already know which hats work for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe design holds up through regular washes. Skip the bleach, don't iron directly on the print, and you're good.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat structured or floppy?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eStructured front panels keep the design looking sharp. The mesh back is flexible for comfort.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDepends on your workplace. If your boss has a sense of humor, go for it. If not, that sounds like a you problem.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42012846719058,"sku":"4811494_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Eat_Drywall_Funny_Hats_For_Men_Weird_Inappropriate_Trucker_Hat_Front_View.jpg?v=1762481907"},{"product_id":"i-love-finger-painting-im-paint-inappropriate-couples-shirt","title":"I Love To Finger Paint I'm Paint Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Love To Finger Paint I'm Paint Tee from Unethical Threads is a matching couples shirt for people whose love language involves getting a little messy. If you have to ask what the joke is, this one isn't for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who've been together long enough that subtlety died years ago. This is the couple that holds hands in public and makes everyone else uncomfortable. The I Love To Finger Paint set is for partners who treat innuendo like a love language and gift-giving like a competitive sport.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that can handle whatever you put it through (we're talking laundry, relax)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e, because this joke works on every body type\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck, classic cut\u003c\/strong\u003e, nothing weird going on structurally\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay locked in, not peeling off after three washes like a cheap bumper sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMachine washable\u003c\/strong\u003e, though the memories of wearing this in public are permanent\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good couples gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a great couples gift. This is the move for anniversaries, Valentine's Day, or any time you want to remind your partner exactly what you bring to the table. It lands way harder than a candle or a gift card. Honestly, if your significant other doesn't laugh at this, you might have bigger problems than gift selection.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this come as a set or do I buy each shirt separately?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEach shirt is sold separately so you can grab the right size for each person. Pick up the I Love To Finger Paint tee here and the I'm Paint tee on its own listing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNope. DTG printing bonds the ink directly into the fabric. No cracking, no fading, no sad peeling situation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this appropriate to wear in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat depends entirely on your definition of appropriate. We say yes. Your in-laws might disagree.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42013145759826,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42013145792594,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42013145825362,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42013145858130,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42013145890898,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42013145923666,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42013145956434,"sku":"FingerPainter-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42013145989202,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42013146021970,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42013146054738,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42013146087506,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42013146120274,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42013146153042,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42013146185810,"sku":"FingerPainter-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Love_To_Finger_Paint_I_m_Paint_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481916"},{"product_id":"legalize-cocaine-25-funny-gen-z-humor-meme-t-shirt","title":"Legalize Cocaine 25' Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Legalize Cocaine 25' Tee is Unethical Threads at peak irreverence. A parody shirt that says what your inner voice screams at every boring party. Wear it to a cookout, a festival, or just the grocery store if you're feeling particularly unhinged.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho Actually Wears This?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who peaked in the group chat. If your sense of humor has ever made someone audibly gasp at a family function, congratulations, you found your uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe Legalize Cocaine 25' Tee pairs well with poor decisions and an absolute refusal to read the room. It's the kind of shirt that either makes you the funniest person at the party or gets you uninvited from the next one. Both outcomes are acceptable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper freebie from a 5K you didn't run\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL (everyone deserves to make questionable fashion choices)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck. Nothing fancy, just the right frame for the chaos.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG print for colors that stay loud long after your reputation doesn't\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMachine washable, because we know where this shirt is going\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs This Actually a Good Gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the best gift. Nothing says \"I know exactly who you are\" like handing someone a Legalize Cocaine tee at their birthday party in front of their parents.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is a gag gift that people actually wear, which is the highest compliment a funny shirt can get. Perfect for white elephants, bachelor parties, or anyone on your list who you'd describe as \"a lot.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually about legalizing cocaine?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's a parody. You're wearing a joke, not running for office.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Legalize Cocaine 25' Tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSizes S through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Runs comfortable, not boxy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's a DTG print on heavyweight cotton. Wash cold, tumble dry low, and the colors stay put.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eLegally, yes. Socially, that's between you and whatever room you're walking into.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gag gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eOnly if you want them to either become your best friend or never speak to you again. High risk, high reward.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42019167371346,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42019167404114,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42019167436882,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42019167469650,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42019167502418,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42019167535186,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42019167567954,"sku":"Cocacoca-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42019167600722,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42019167633490,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42019167666258,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42019167699026,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42019167731794,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42019167764562,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42019167797330,"sku":"Cocacoca-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Legalize_Cocaine_25_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481928"},{"product_id":"if-they-talk-behind-your-back-fart-funny-wolf-meme-t-shirt","title":"If They Talk Behind Your Back Fart Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe If They Talk Behind Your Back Fart tee from Unethical Threads takes the lone wolf motivational poster and gives it the only punchline it ever deserved. Howling wolf. Biological warfare. Peak \"I don't need your approval\" energy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's wearing a fart joke shirt in public?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who stopped caring about first impressions somewhere around 2019.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt is for the friend everyone describes as \"a lot\" and means it as a compliment. You've got the howling wolf, you've got the declaration of biological intent. It's motivational poster art for people who think LinkedIn influencers deserve worse.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with sleeves\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck (the one neckline that never tried too hard)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed for color that survives your questionable laundry habits\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePre-shrunk, because we know you're not reading care labels\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift or just a cry for help?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBoth, honestly.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf someone in your life has ever crop-dusted a meeting and made eye contact while doing it, this is their shirt. 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It's the kind of matching outfit that says \"we're fun\" instead of \"we share a login to everything.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper situation\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit from S to 4XL (yes, 4XL, because everyone deserves to make bad jokes)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the graphic won't crack, peel, or ghost after washing\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs with the I'm Peace tee, sold separately, because we're not running a charity\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good couples gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you know the couple, absolutely.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBuy both tees, throw them in a gift bag, and become the most legendary gift-giver at any shower, anniversary, or random Tuesday. Just make sure the recipients can take a joke. 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If you know, you know.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who peaked in group chats. The ones whose friends screenshot their texts and send them around.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf your humor runs hot enough that you've been asked to \"tone it down\" at a family dinner, this shirt was designed for you. It's the kind of joke that separates the fun table from the kids' table at every gathering.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a translucent napkin\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e because some things don't need reinventing\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the design stays vivid wash after wash, no cracking, no peeling\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs well with poor decisions and good stories\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's an incredible gift if you want to find out how well someone really knows you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSend it to the friend who already gets it and you're a legend. 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Cold wash, tumble dry low, and it'll keep its shape.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42063719923794,"sku":"GoliThree-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42063719956562,"sku":"GoliThree-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42063719989330,"sku":"GoliThree-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42063720022098,"sku":"GoliThree-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42063720054866,"sku":"GoliThree-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42063720087634,"sku":"GoliThree-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42063720120402,"sku":"GoliThree-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Call_Me_Goldilocks_Cause_I_m_About_To_Try_All_Three_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482119"},{"product_id":"new-i-got-narcanned-at-taco-bell-funny-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* I Got Narcanned At Taco Bell Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Got Narcanned At Taco Bell tee from Unethical Threads is oddly specific, deeply inappropriate, and definitely based on someone's real worst night. You're either laughing already or you're not our target audience.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think dark humor is a love language. The friend in your group chat who always has a story that shouldn't be told in public.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is the kind of shirt you wear to brunch and watch people read it twice. It hits that sweet spot between \"that's horrible\" and \"where did you get that.\" If your humor needs a disclaimer, welcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that can take a beating (and so can your reputation)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck, because you've already stuck yours out far enough\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG (direct-to-garment) print that holds color through countless washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs well with bad decisions and a Baja Blast\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor the right person, this is the funniest gift they'll get all year. For the wrong person, it's a cry for help they didn't ask for.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou know which friend this is for. The one with the mugshot story, the one who's been banned from at least one establishment. 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Whether you should is between you and whatever higher power you believe in.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42148614242386,"sku":"GNarcans-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42148614275154,"sku":"GNarcans-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42148614307922,"sku":"GNarcans-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42148614340690,"sku":"GNarcans-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42148614373458,"sku":"GNarcans-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42148614406226,"sku":"GNarcans-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42148614438994,"sku":"GNarcans-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42148614471762,"sku":"GNarcans-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42148614504530,"sku":"GNarcans-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42148614537298,"sku":"GNarcans-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42148614570066,"sku":"GNarcans-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42148614602834,"sku":"GNarcans-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42148614635602,"sku":"GNarcans-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42148614668370,"sku":"GNarcans-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Got_Narcanned_At_Taco_Bell_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1757803880"},{"product_id":"i-had-cybersex-with-chatgpt-funny-inappropriate-shirt","title":"I Had Cybersex With Chatgpt Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Had Cybersex With ChatGPT tee from Unethical Threads is exactly what it sounds like. A confession nobody asked for, printed on heavyweight cotton. If your relationship with AI has crossed a line you can't quite explain to your therapist, this is your uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho Actually Wears This?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who've spent too long in a ChatGPT session at 2 AM and came out different. Tech workers, terminally online degenerates, and anyone whose browser history should probably be sealed by a court.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou know who you are. The rest of us know too, because you're wearing the shirt. Honestly, we respect the transparency.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a shirt, not a tissue paper freebie from a hackathon\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e for when you want to look normal from the neck up\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the confession stays crisp wash after wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eYes, the AI consented (probably)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs This a Good Gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a great gift for someone who won't shut up about AI.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYour friend who talks to ChatGPT more than actual humans? This. Your coworker who keeps saying \"I asked my AI about that\"? Also this. It's cheaper than an intervention and way funnier.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e It's pre-shrunk heavyweight cotton. Wash it however you want.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e S through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eWill this offend people?\u003c\/strong\u003e That's kind of the point. If everyone at the table laughs, you need a funnier table.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eIs the print going to fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e DTG printing locks the ink into the fabric. It holds up through the wash cycle better than your dignity.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCan I actually have cybersex with ChatGPT?\u003c\/strong\u003e We sell shirts, not tech support. But we're not here to judge.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42160657301586,"sku":"CyberChat-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42160657334354,"sku":"CyberChat-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42160657367122,"sku":"CyberChat-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42160657399890,"sku":"CyberChat-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42160657432658,"sku":"CyberChat-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42160657465426,"sku":"CyberChat-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42160657498194,"sku":"CyberChat-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42160657530962,"sku":"CyberChat-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42160657563730,"sku":"CyberChat-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42160657596498,"sku":"CyberChat-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42160657629266,"sku":"CyberChat-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42160657662034,"sku":"CyberChat-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42160657694802,"sku":"CyberChat-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42160657727570,"sku":"CyberChat-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Had_Cybersex_With_Chatgpt_Black_Shirt.jpg?v=1758825399"},{"product_id":"jew-jitsu-funny-jewish-bjj-meme-humor-shirt","title":"Jew Jitsu Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Jew Jitsu Tee from Unethical Threads is what happens when the chosen people choose violence. If you train, you already get it. If you don't, you still get it, because this pun does all the heavy lifting for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnyone who's been told they have a great sense of humor and took it as a personality trait. BJJ guys who want their wardrobe to match their ground game energy, comedy nerds, and Jewish friends who've been waiting for merch at the exact intersection of grappling and guilt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is the shirt that lives in your gym bag and earns more compliments than your actual technique.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that won't disintegrate after a few wash cycles\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL, because grapplers come in every weight class\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck (no weird collars happening here)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the colors outlast your cardio\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePre-shrunk, because surprises belong on the mat, not in the dryer\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually offensive?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a pun. 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Your gym attendance might fade, but the shirt won't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I train in this shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTechnically yes, but save it for off the mat. Gi or rashguard for rolling, Jew Jitsu Tee for everything else.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf the person trains BJJ or appreciates a sharp pun, absolutely. If they're easily offended, maybe grab them a candle instead.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes are available?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. 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It's stupid. It's juvenile. You already know you want it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople whose friends already expect the worst from them. This is the shirt for whoever takes it one step too far in the group chat, the one who sends the joke everyone's thinking but nobody says out loud.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWear it to the bar, a cookout, or anywhere you want someone to slowly shake their head at you. Pairs well with confidence and a complete lack of shame.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a shirt you'd choose to wear, not a gas station freebie\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e, because terrible taste comes in every size\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e keeping it simple so the shirt can do the heavy lifting\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e for color that holds up wash after wash (the joke isn't fading even if your dignity does)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eCan I actually wear this in public?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTechnically, yes. Strategically, that's between you and your comfort level. Someone's grandma is going to read it out loud at the grocery store and you'll just have to stand there. Totally worth it. If you're shopping at Unethical Threads, you already know what you signed up for.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the Japanties tee a good gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf your friend has a terrible sense of humor and no filter, this is the perfect gift. If they're easily offended, maybe grab a candle instead.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this shirt come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Runs true to size, so grab your usual.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or crack after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNope. The DTG print bonds ink directly into the fabric, so the design holds up wash after wash. No cracking, no peeling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually comfortable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight cotton with a relaxed fit. It's a real shirt, not some flimsy novelty tee you'll wear once and toss.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42160665657426,"sku":"Japanties-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42160665690194,"sku":"Japanties-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42160665722962,"sku":"Japanties-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42160665755730,"sku":"Japanties-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42160665788498,"sku":"Japanties-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42160665821266,"sku":"Japanties-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42160665854034,"sku":"Japanties-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42160665886802,"sku":"Japanties-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42160665919570,"sku":"Japanties-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42160665952338,"sku":"Japanties-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42160665985106,"sku":"Japanties-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42160666017874,"sku":"Japanties-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42160666050642,"sku":"Japanties-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42160666083410,"sku":"Japanties-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Are_You_From_Japan_Cuz_I_Wanna_Get_In_Your_Japanties_Shirt.jpg?v=1758826036"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/collections\/Funny_Designer_T_Shirts.jpg?v=1761607907","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/collections\/funny-designer-t-shirts.oembed","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}