{"title":"Funny Hen Do T Shirt Ideas","description":"\u003cstyle\u003e\n.collection-intro {margin: 0 0 15px 0;}\n.collection-intro p {margin: 0 0 15px 0; line-height: 1.6;}\n.trust-signals {background: #e8f5e9; padding: 12px; border-radius: 6px; text-align: center; font-size: 13px; margin: 10px 0 15px 0;}\n.desc-collapsed {max-height: 0; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease;}\n.desc-expanded {max-height: 5000px;}\n.read-more-btn {background: #3498db; color: white; border: none; padding: 10px 20px; border-radius: 5px; cursor: pointer; font-size: 14px; margin: 10px 0 20px 0; font-weight: 600;}\n.read-more-btn:hover {background: #2980b9;}\n\u003c\/style\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv class=\"collection-intro\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eShop Unethical Threads' funny hen do t shirt ideas collection for designs that make people do a double-take. Our funny hen do t shirt ideas bring the laughs without compromising on comfort or quality. Available in sizes S-4XL with hassle-free returns.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"trust-signals\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e✓ Free Shipping On All Orders\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ 30-Day Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ Sizes S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cbutton class=\"read-more-btn\" onclick=\"var desc = document.getElementById('collection-desc-funny-hen-do-t-shirt-ideas'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-collapsed'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-expanded'); this.textContent = desc.classList.contains('desc-expanded') ? 'Show Less ▲' : 'Read More ▼';\"\u003eRead More ▼\u003c\/button\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv id=\"collection-desc-funny-hen-do-t-shirt-ideas\" class=\"desc-collapsed\"\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eAbout Our Funny Hen Do T Shirt Ideas Collection\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePremium Quality \u0026amp; Features\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePerfect Occasions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eWhy Choose Unethical Threads\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRelated Collections:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-shirts\"\u003eComplete Funny Shirts Collection\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-stag-do-t-shirt-ideas\"\u003eFunny Stag Do T Shirt Ideas\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/t-shirt-roulette-ideas-funny\"\u003eT-Shirt Roulette Ideas Funny\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"CollectionPage\",\n  \"name\": \"Funny Hen Do T Shirt Ideas\",\n  \"url\": \"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-hen-do-t-shirt-ideas\"\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"weiner-rides-25-cents-funny-inappropriate-crazy-trucker-hat-sayings","title":"Weiner Rides 25 Cents Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Weiner Rides 25 Cents hat from Unethical Threads is exactly what it sounds like. A funny trucker hat for people who think cheap thrills should be advertised on your head. Pair it with sunburns, bad decisions, and a total lack of shame.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's Actually Wearing This Hat?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who peaked in fun, not in high school.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe Weiner Rides 25 Cents hat is for the guy at the cookout already manning the grill, beer in hand, making jokes nobody asked for but everybody needed. It's also weirdly popular as a gift, which says a lot about the kind of friends you keep.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured front panel with mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e (your forehead sweats, we get it)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eSnapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e, one size fits most heads\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-curved bill\u003c\/strong\u003e for that \"I've worn this hat every weekend for three years\" look\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePrinted graphic\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds up through sun, sweat, and questionable life choices\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex.\u003c\/strong\u003e Degeneracy has no gender.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs This a Good Gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt might be the perfect gift.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf someone in your life would laugh at a hat that says Weiner Rides 25 Cents, you already know they need it. Father's Day, bachelor parties, white elephant exchanges where you actually want to win. It's the gift that says \"I know exactly who you are and I support it.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. Snapback closure fits most head sizes. One size, many bad decisions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this hat get me in trouble?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDepends on where you wear it. Church? Probably. Tailgate? You'll be a hero.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat depends entirely on your HR department's sense of humor. We're not liable either way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift for Father's Day?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf your dad laughs at inappropriate jokes (and let's be honest, he taught you most of them), then yes. Absolutely.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"FAQPage\",\n  \"mainEntity\": [\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"Is this hat adjustable?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"Yes. Snapback closure fits most head sizes. One size, many bad decisions.\"\n      }\n    },\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"Will this hat get me in trouble?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"Depends on where you wear it. Church? Probably. Tailgate? 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Absolutely.\"\n      }\n    }\n  ]\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":42158478032978,"sku":"4311655_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/4a2d42e0-9af5-424a-bf95-590df0500f6b.png?v=1762481914"},{"product_id":"new-rome-wasnt-burned-in-a-day-tesla-funny-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* Rome Wasn't Burned In A Day Tesla Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Rome Wasn't Burned In A Day Tesla Tee from Unethical Threads is what happens when ancient history, corporate hubris, and a factory fire walk into a bar. Heavyweight cotton, full-color DTG print, and the kind of joke that makes people either laugh or quietly unfollow you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who read the news and cope with laughter instead of therapy. If you've ever watched a press conference and thought \"this is performance art,\" you're the target audience.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt also does well at cookouts, game nights, and anywhere someone's about to say \"wait, is that real?\" The Rome Wasn't Burned In A Day design hits that sweet spot between clever and unhinged, which is basically our entire brand.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like you paid for a shirt, not a napkin\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S to 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e, because dark humor isn't size-exclusive\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, because we're chaotic, not tacky\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG (direct-to-garment) print\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay vivid through every wash, not cracked and peeling after three spins\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eYes, you can machine wash it. We're not monsters.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. That's sort of the point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis tee sits at the intersection of historical wordplay and modern tech satire, which means it'll land perfectly with some people and make others visibly uncomfortable. If both of those outcomes sound fun to you, you're in the right place.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an anti-Elon shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's a shirt about Rome. And fire. And a certain electric car company that keeps having both. Draw your own conclusions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works on every body type.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's heavyweight cotton with a DTG print. Wash cold, tumble low, and it'll hold up fine.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift for someone who hates Elon Musk?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWe can't think of a better one. Wrap it or don't, the reaction will be the same.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"FAQPage\",\n  \"mainEntity\": [\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"Is this an anti-Elon shirt?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"It's a shirt about Rome. And fire. And a certain electric car company that keeps having both. 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Wrap it or don't, the reaction will be the same.\"\n      }\n    }\n  ]\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42016368754770,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42016368787538,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42016368820306,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42016368853074,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42016368885842,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42016368918610,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42016368951378,"sku":"RomeBurn-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Rome_Wasn_t_Burned_In_A_Day_T_Shirt_Funny_Offensive_Tesla_Tee.jpg?v=1762481927"},{"product_id":"men-eat-what-donkey-t-shirt-funny-inappropriate-ass-adult-humor-tee","title":"*NEW* Men Eat What? 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If your humor runs dark and your wardrobe runs loud, welcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper freebie from a 5K\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e (yes, we see you, big guys)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e because some things don't need reinventing\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors don't bail after the first wash. Unlike your dignity.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-shrunk.\u003c\/strong\u003e We thought of everything except your reputation.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the best kind of gift. The kind that makes someone laugh so hard they forget to say thank you. Perfect for birthdays, bachelor parties, or that friend whose sense of humor you've quietly admired from a safe distance. Just make sure you know your audience. If you give this to the wrong person, that's on you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does the Men Eat What Donkey shirt mean?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf you have to ask, you might not be ready. But the donkeys on this shirt look very concerned for a reason.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eRuns true to size in a relaxed, unisex fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes. Available S through 4XL.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003ePre-shrunk cotton. It holds up just fine.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDepends on where you work. If your boss laughs, you're golden. If HR has a file on you already, maybe save it for the weekend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gag gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eOne of the best. Just make sure the recipient actually has a sense of humor. We can't help you if they don't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"FAQPage\",\n  \"mainEntity\": [\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"What does the Men Eat What Donkey shirt mean?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"If you have to ask, you might not be ready. 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We can't help you if they don't.\"\n      }\n    }\n  ]\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42021085053010,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42021085085778,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42021085118546,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42021085151314,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42021085184082,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42021085216850,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Men_Eat_What_Donkey_Ass_Inappropriate_Adult_Humor_Funny_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481931"},{"product_id":"im-fucking-stupid-t-shirt-funny-inappropriate-matching-couples-tee","title":"I'm Fucking Stupid Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I'm Fucking Stupid tee from Unethical Threads is the other half of the most honest couples shirt set on the internet. One of you wears \"I'm Stupid.\" The other wears this. We both know which one you're buying.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho wears the \"I'm Fucking Stupid\" shirt?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe one who lost the argument. Or the one who knows they're the reason the other person needs therapy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEither way, this is the self-aware pick in the matching set. You and your partner both know the truth. This shirt just makes it public.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that can handle your bad decisions\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e, S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, because you're classy like that\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e for color that won't quit before you do\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMachine washable.\u003c\/strong\u003e Unlike your reputation.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good couples gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the best couples gift if your relationship runs on roasting each other.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePair it with the \"I'm Stupid\" tee and you've got the most honest matching set at any cookout, bar, or family gathering that's about to get uncomfortable. If your partner can't take the joke, that's a bigger problem than the shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this come with the matching \"I'm Stupid\" shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo, this listing is for the \"I'm Fucking Stupid\" tee only. The \"I'm Stupid\" shirt is sold separately.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the I'm Fucking Stupid shirt come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe DTG printing keeps the colors locked in. Wash inside out on cold and you're good.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this without the matching shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAbsolutely. It works as a solo statement too. Some truths don't need a partner to land.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"FAQPage\",\n  \"mainEntity\": [\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"Does this come with the matching \\\"I'm Stupid\\\" shirt?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"No, this listing is for the \\\"I'm Fucking Stupid\\\" tee only. The \\\"I'm Stupid\\\" shirt is sold separately.\"\n      }\n    },\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"What sizes does the I'm Fucking Stupid shirt come in?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"S through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. 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The Dropkick series doesn't mess around, and neither do you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually holds up (not that tissue-thin stuff that goes see-through after one wash)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit from S to 4XL, because Diet Coke addiction doesn't discriminate\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck, classic cut\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG print, so the colors stay vivid long after your fifth refill of the day\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePre-shrunk, because surprises are for birthday parties, not laundry day\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill This Offend Someone?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProbably. That's sort of the point. If you're buying from Unethical Threads, you already know the assignment. Your aunt at Thanksgiving might have opinions. Your friends who also have a Diet Coke problem will just want one too.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this run true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. Unisex relaxed fit. If you're between sizes, size up for a looser look or stay true for a standard fit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this actually soft or is it stiff?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight cotton, so it has substance. Not flimsy, not cardboard. It softens up after a couple washes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHow do I wash this without ruining the print?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCold wash, inside out, tumble dry low. The DTG print holds up well. Don't iron directly on the graphic.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this around kids?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou can. 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It's the kind of joke that separates the fun table from the kids' table at every gathering.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a translucent napkin\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e because some things don't need reinventing\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the design stays vivid wash after wash, no cracking, no peeling\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs well with poor decisions and good stories\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's an incredible gift if you want to find out how well someone really knows you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSend it to the friend who already gets it and you're a legend. 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It's a Coca-Cola parody for people whose humor never left the group chat. Unhinged? Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think soda brand loyalty is a personality trait and child safety is negotiable. Your friend who says the worst thing at the barbecue and somehow still gets invited back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf your love for Coca-Cola borders on criminal, this is your uniform. The Dropkick series is one of our biggest lines for a reason. People see it, they get it, they want one for every brand they'd commit a minor felony over.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a see-through napkin\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S to 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e (yes, even the big soda enthusiasts are covered)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e because we're unhinged, not experimental\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG-printed graphic\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds its color wash after wash, no cracking or peeling\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eNo, you can't actually dropkick children. But you can look like you'd consider it.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. It's the funniest thing you can hand a Coca-Cola fan who doesn't scare easily.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDark humor lovers, meme-fluent coworkers, the friend who always takes the joke one step too far. If you know someone who'd read \"I Would Dropkick A Child For A Coca Cola\" and immediately say \"where do I buy this,\" you already know this is the move. Birthday, holiday, gag gift exchange, whatever. It lands.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the I Would Dropkick A Child For A Coca Cola shirt true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt runs unisex relaxed fit. If you want it fitted, go with your normal size. If you want that oversized look, size up one.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shirt get me in trouble?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat depends entirely on where you wear it and how fast you can run. We've seen everything from laughs to horrified double takes. Wear at your own risk.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the print quality like?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDTG printed directly into the fabric. The colors won't crack, peel, or fade into a sad ghost of themselves after a few washes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I return it if my family disowns me?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWe have a return policy, but we can't return your family's respect. Check our return page for the details.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this come in kids' sizes?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. And given the subject matter, that's probably for the best.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"FAQPage\",\n  \"mainEntity\": [\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"Is the I Would Dropkick A Child For A Coca Cola shirt true to size?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"It runs unisex relaxed fit. If you want it fitted, go with your normal size. If you want that oversized look, size up one.\"\n      }\n    },\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"Will this shirt get me in trouble?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"That depends entirely on where you wear it and how fast you can run. 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No, you probably shouldn't wear it to church.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf the recipient sends memes at 2 AM, absolutely.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect for birthdays, white elephants, or any occasion where you want to be remembered as \"that friend.\" It walks the line between thoughtful and unhinged, which is honestly the best kind of gift. Just make sure the person you're buying it for has a sense of humor. We can't help you if they don't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Dr Pegger tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. It's a unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfy no matter your build.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's DTG printed, meaning the ink is in the fabric, not sitting on top. 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It hits that sweet spot between \"that's horrible\" and \"where did you get that.\" If your humor needs a disclaimer, welcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that can take a beating (and so can your reputation)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck, because you've already stuck yours out far enough\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG (direct-to-garment) print that holds color through countless washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs well with bad decisions and a Baja Blast\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor the right person, this is the funniest gift they'll get all year. For the wrong person, it's a cry for help they didn't ask for.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou know which friend this is for. The one with the mugshot story, the one who's been banned from at least one establishment. 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