{"title":"Funny T Shirt Store Nyc","description":"\u003cstyle\u003e\n.collection-intro {margin: 0 0 15px 0;}\n.collection-intro p {margin: 0 0 15px 0; line-height: 1.6;}\n.trust-signals {background: #e8f5e9; padding: 12px; border-radius: 6px; text-align: center; font-size: 13px; margin: 10px 0 15px 0;}\n.desc-collapsed {max-height: 0; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease;}\n.desc-expanded {max-height: 5000px;}\n.read-more-btn {background: #3498db; color: white; border: none; padding: 10px 20px; border-radius: 5px; cursor: pointer; font-size: 14px; margin: 10px 0 20px 0; font-weight: 600;}\n.read-more-btn:hover {background: #2980b9;}\n\u003c\/style\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv class=\"collection-intro\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWelcome to Unethical Threads' funny t shirt store nyc collection where humor meets premium craftsmanship. Our funny t shirt store nyc feature original designs that refuse to play it safe, guaranteed to spark conversations. Available in sizes S-4XL with fast shipping and a 30-day satisfaction guarantee.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"trust-signals\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e✓ Free Shipping On All Orders\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ 30-Day Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ Sizes S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cbutton class=\"read-more-btn\" onclick=\"var desc = document.getElementById('collection-desc-funny-t-shirt-store-nyc'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-collapsed'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-expanded'); this.textContent = desc.classList.contains('desc-expanded') ? 'Show Less ▲' : 'Read More ▼';\"\u003eRead More ▼\u003c\/button\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv id=\"collection-desc-funny-t-shirt-store-nyc\" class=\"desc-collapsed\"\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eAbout Our Funny T Shirt Store Nyc Collection\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePremium Quality \u0026amp; Features\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePerfect Occasions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eWhy Choose Unethical Threads\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRelated Collections:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-shirts\"\u003eComplete Funny Shirts Collection\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-t-shirts-nyc\"\u003eFunny T Shirts Nyc\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-shirt-store\"\u003eFunny Shirt Store\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"CollectionPage\",\n  \"name\": \"Funny T Shirt Store Nyc\",\n  \"url\": \"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-t-shirt-store-nyc\"\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"i-dont-need-fun-to-have-alcohol-funny-drinking-beer-trucker-hat","title":"I Don't Need Fun To Have Alcohol Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Don't Need Fun To Have Alcohol Hat from Unethical Threads is a trucker hat for anyone who settled the fun vs. alcohol debate years ago. Alcohol won. This snapback just makes it official.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears a drinking hat unironically?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who stopped pretending they drink for the taste somewhere around their mid-twenties.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is the hat you throw on for a barbecue, a tailgate, or your backyard at 2pm on a Tuesday. It tells everyone exactly where you stand without you having to say a word. Honestly, it's doing you a favor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured foam front\u003c\/strong\u003e with cotton twill face, so the print stays crisp even when you don't\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e because nobody wants a sweaty head on top of a hangover\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most heads comfortably (yes, even yours)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eFull-color print\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds up through regular washes and the occasional spill\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eOne size fits most.\u003c\/strong\u003e If your head is truly enormous, that's between you and genetics\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt might be the best gift you buy all year.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis hat is perfect for anyone who's ever said \"I'm not an alcoholic, I'm a connoisseur\" with a straight face. Works for birthdays, white elephants, bachelor parties, or just because you saw it and immediately thought of someone specific. That person knows who they are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the print hold up?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. Full-color print that holds up through regular washes. Treat it like you'd treat any hat you actually like.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSnapback closure in the back. One size fits most adults comfortably.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProbably. But the kind of person offended by a drinking hat wasn't going to be fun at the party anyway.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDepends entirely on where you work and how much you value HR's opinion of you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the hat made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eStructured foam front with cotton twill and breathable mesh back panels. Comfortable enough to forget you're wearing it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Royal \/ Red","offer_id":42012843704402,"sku":"2397894_15909","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ White \/ Black","offer_id":42012843671634,"sku":"2397894_15908","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black","offer_id":42012843638866,"sku":"2397894_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Don_t_Need_Fun_To_Have_Alcohol_Funny_Drinking_Beer_Trucker_Hat_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481903"},{"product_id":"autism-powered-fuck-machine-hat","title":"Autism Powered Fuck Machine Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Autism Powered Fuck Machine Hat from Unethical Threads is for people who turned their diagnosis into a flex and refuse to be quiet about it. Structured cotton front, mesh back, and a statement that hits before you even open your mouth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually wearing this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNeurodivergent people who own it completely. The ones who made peace with the way their brain works and decided the rest of the world can keep up or get out of the way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou know the friend who hyperfocused on something for 14 hours straight and emerged looking slightly feral? The one who can drop encyclopedic knowledge on their niche interest but forgot to eat lunch? That person already has this hat in their cart.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured cotton front panels\u003c\/strong\u003e that keep the message crisp and readable\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e, because your brain already runs hot enough\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e that fits most head sizes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCurved bill\u003c\/strong\u003e, pre-shaped so you're ready to go right out of the box\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDurable print\u003c\/strong\u003e that won't crack, peel, or fade when you inevitably wear this three days in a row\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eCan I give this as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly if you actually know the person. This is a gift for someone who already makes these jokes about themselves, not a random grab for a white elephant exchange.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor the right person (your neurodivergent partner, sibling, best friend), this is the kind of gift that gets worn immediately and often. They'll think of you every time someone in public does a visible double take.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTo some people, absolutely. To the people it's made for, it's the funniest thing they own. Know your audience.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat size is this trucker hat?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOne size fits most. The adjustable snapback closure in the back handles the rest.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or crack?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. The print is made to hold up through regular washing. Just skip the dryer to keep it looking its best.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this actually for autistic people?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's for anyone who thinks it's funny. But it hits different when it's your own joke to make.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Light Pink \/ White \/ Light Pink","offer_id":42012844949586,"sku":"2311174_16750","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ White \/ Black","offer_id":42012844982354,"sku":"2311174_15908","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Royal \/ Red","offer_id":42012845015122,"sku":"2311174_15909","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White","offer_id":42012845047890,"sku":"2311174_15905","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/foam-trucker-hat-light-pink-white-light-pink-one-size-back-67ed525ae541a.jpg?v=1762481906"},{"product_id":"i-eat-drywall-funny-weird-trucker-hat","title":"I Eat Drywall Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Eat Drywall Hat from Unethical Threads is a trucker hat for people whose sense of humor peaked somewhere between \"chaotic\" and \"concerning.\" It says what it says. You either get it or you're Googling it right now, and both outcomes are funny.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears a hat that says I Eat Drywall?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eContractors, gym bros, and anyone who peaked in a group chat. This is the hat equivalent of a personality test nobody asked you to take.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf someone at Home Depot nods at you while you're wearing this, that's your new best friend. You don't choose the drywall life, but you can certainly advertise it on your forehead.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured cotton front panels\u003c\/strong\u003e that hold the absurdity upright\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e so your head gets airflow even when your decisions don't deserve respect\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most skulls, even the thick ones\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePrinted design that holds up\u003c\/strong\u003e through washes and questionable life choices\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic curved brim\u003c\/strong\u003e for that \"I swear I'm normal\" silhouette\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eDoes this work as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a perfect gift if you know the person well enough to insult them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBirthday, White Elephant, \"sorry about what I said at Thanksgiving,\" whatever the occasion. The I Eat Drywall Hat works because it requires no explanation and offers none. Hand it over. Watch their face. That's the whole gift.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the I Eat Drywall Hat fit big heads?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe snapback closure adjusts to fit most head sizes. If your head is truly enormous, you probably already know which hats work for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe design holds up through regular washes. Skip the bleach, don't iron directly on the print, and you're good.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat structured or floppy?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eStructured front panels keep the design looking sharp. The mesh back is flexible for comfort.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDepends on your workplace. If your boss has a sense of humor, go for it. If not, that sounds like a you problem.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42012846719058,"sku":"4811494_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Eat_Drywall_Funny_Hats_For_Men_Weird_Inappropriate_Trucker_Hat_Front_View.jpg?v=1762481907"},{"product_id":"strip-club-veteran-funny-inappropriate-military-gift-hat","title":"Strip Club Veteran Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Strip Club Veteran hat is for the guy who doesn't just have stories, he has a permanent VIP section in his memory. This Unethical Threads trucker hat announces your distinguished service record without saying a word. Well, technically it says the words for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe guys who've earned their stripes. Bachelor party survivors, regulars who know the Tuesday lunch special, and anyone whose friend group has at least one really good lawyer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis hat doesn't need context. If you know, you know. And if you don't, you probably shouldn't ask. It's the kind of headwear that tells a whole story before you even open your mouth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured front panel with mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e for breathability during those long nights out\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most heads (and most egos)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eVivid printed design\u003c\/strong\u003e that won't fade, crack, or snitch on you\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eComfortable all-day fit\u003c\/strong\u003e whether you're at the barbecue or the after-party\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePairs well\u003c\/strong\u003e with a cold beer and questionable life choices\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the perfect gift. Specifically for the friend everyone has one of.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou know the one. He's got the stories nobody believes until they see the photos. Birthdays, bachelor parties, White Elephant, or just a random Tuesday because you saw it and thought of him. The Strip Club Veteran hat is less of a gift and more of an award ceremony.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e Yes. Snapback closure fits most head sizes comfortably.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print hold up?\u003c\/strong\u003e The design is printed to last through washes, sun, and whatever else you put this hat through.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e You can. Whether you should is between you and your sense of shame.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an actual military hat?\u003c\/strong\u003e No. This is a trucker hat for veterans of a very different kind of service.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the return policy?\u003c\/strong\u003e Check our return policy page, but honestly, nobody sends this one back.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42012849373266,"sku":"4829162_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Strip_Club_Veteran_Funny_Inappropriate_Trucker_Hat_Military_Gift_For_Men.jpg?v=1762481911"},{"product_id":"spitters-are-quitters-funny-inappropriate-sayings-hat-for-men","title":"Spitters Are Quitters Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Spitters Are Quitters hat from Unethical Threads is a trucker hat for people who've already made their decision and have no interest in revisiting it. If you know, you know. If you don't, this probably isn't your section of the internet.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually wearing this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople with a sense of humor and absolutely no filter.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is the hat you throw on at the cookout when you want your father-in-law to quietly reconsider the entire marriage. It pairs well with a cold beer, a lawn chair, and complete disregard for polite company.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured front panel with mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e for airflow, because your head should stay cool even when the jokes land hot\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most heads, even the big ones full of terrible ideas\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHigh-quality printed graphic\u003c\/strong\u003e that won't crack, peel, or fade on you\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic trucker hat silhouette\u003c\/strong\u003e that works whether you're at the lake or at a bar\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePairs well with\u003c\/strong\u003e questionable decisions and a refusal to grow up\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eCan I give this as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAbsolutely, if you actually know the person.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is a perfect gift for your buddy who says the thing everyone else is thinking. 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And yet here we are. It's dumb, it's flirty, and you already know if this is for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eWho Actually Wears This?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think puns are the highest form of comedy. Honestly, they might be right.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis one lands especially well at bars, travel meetups, and anywhere someone might appreciate the intersection of world geography and deeply questionable flirting. Your mom will hate it. 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It's the dumbest, most historically inaccurate crossover nobody asked for, and you're going to wear the hell out of it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying a shirt about medieval hot sauce?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople with taste, and by taste we mean the kind that gets you weird looks at family dinner. You're in good company.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe Sir Racha tee lands with the person at the cookout who won't shut up about heat levels and also knows way too much about the Crusades. Sriracha fans, history nerds, pun enthusiasts, general chaos agents. You know who you are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a promotional giveaway\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit in sizes S through 4XL, because knights come in all builds\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck, as the king intended\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the colors stay locked in, not peeling off after three washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs nicely with actual sriracha stains (not a guarantee, just an observation)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eDoes this work as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAbsolutely. If someone in your life puts sriracha on everything and thinks they're funny, this is the move.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's specific enough to feel personal and weird enough that nobody else is getting them the same thing. That's the sweet spot for a gift. 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If your humor lives in the gutter, welcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a napkin with a screen print\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, because we're classy like that\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors don't bail after three washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eYes, you can wear it to a barbecue. No, you probably shouldn't wear it to church.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf the recipient sends memes at 2 AM, absolutely.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect for birthdays, white elephants, or any occasion where you want to be remembered as \"that friend.\" It walks the line between thoughtful and unhinged, which is honestly the best kind of gift. Just make sure the person you're buying it for has a sense of humor. We can't help you if they don't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Dr Pegger tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. It's a unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfy no matter your build.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's DTG printed, meaning the ink is in the fabric, not sitting on top. 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It's for the unhinged, the self-aware, and anyone who treats their personal life like a Boeing assembly line treats safety protocols.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that can handle the weight of this joke\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG (direct-to-garment) print, so the text stays crisp through your walk of shame and the laundry after\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck (keeps the hickeys hidden, sort of)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePre-shrunk fabric, because at least your shirt won't have commitment issues\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend people?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. Absolutely. That's the entire point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYour conservative aunt, your HR department, anyone who still trusts Boeing with their lives. 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