{"title":"Funny Unisex T Shirts","description":"\u003cstyle\u003e\n.collection-intro {margin: 0 0 15px 0;}\n.collection-intro p {margin: 0 0 15px 0; line-height: 1.6;}\n.trust-signals {background: #e8f5e9; padding: 12px; border-radius: 6px; text-align: center; font-size: 13px; margin: 10px 0 15px 0;}\n.desc-collapsed {max-height: 0; overflow: hidden; transition: max-height 0.3s ease;}\n.desc-expanded {max-height: 5000px;}\n.read-more-btn {background: #3498db; color: white; border: none; padding: 10px 20px; border-radius: 5px; cursor: pointer; font-size: 14px; margin: 10px 0 20px 0; font-weight: 600;}\n.read-more-btn:hover {background: #2980b9;}\n\u003c\/style\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv class=\"collection-intro\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eExplore our funny unisex t shirts collection at Unethical Threads where inappropriate meets impeccable quality. These funny unisex t shirts are crafted for those who appreciate humor that pushes boundaries. Sizes S-4XL, free shipping on all orders.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"trust-signals\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e✓ Free Shipping On All Orders\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ 30-Day Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e | \u003cstrong\u003e✓ Sizes S-4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cbutton class=\"read-more-btn\" onclick=\"var desc = document.getElementById('collection-desc-funny-unisex-t-shirts'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-collapsed'); desc.classList.toggle('desc-expanded'); this.textContent = desc.classList.contains('desc-expanded') ? 'Show Less ▲' : 'Read More ▼';\"\u003eRead More ▼\u003c\/button\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv id=\"collection-desc-funny-unisex-t-shirts\" class=\"desc-collapsed\"\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003eAbout Our Funny Unisex T Shirts Collection\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePremium Quality \u0026amp; Features\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003ePerfect Occasions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eWhy Choose Unethical Threads\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch3\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRelated Collections:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-shirts\"\u003eComplete Funny Shirts Collection\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-t-shirts-for-sale-online\"\u003eFunny T Shirts For Sale Online\u003c\/a\u003e | \u003ca href=\"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/plus-size-funny-t-shirts\"\u003ePlus Size Funny T Shirts\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"CollectionPage\",\n  \"name\": \"Funny Unisex T Shirts\",\n  \"url\": \"https:\/\/UnethicalThreads.com\/collections\/funny-unisex-t-shirts\"\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"i-love-hating-funny-sayings-trucker-hat","title":"I Love Hating Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Love Hating hat from Unethical Threads says what your face already does. It's a trucker hat for people who've accepted that optimism is overrated and decided to accessorize accordingly.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho Actually Wears This?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who are done pretending. The friend who shows up to brunch already annoyed, the coworker who answers \"how's it going\" with a stare.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf hating things is your love language, this hat is fluent. It's not ironic. It's not a phase. You genuinely love hating, and now your head can finally say so.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured foam front\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds its shape (unlike your patience)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e for when your contempt runs hot\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e that fits most heads full of grievances\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eVivid print\u003c\/strong\u003e that stays sharp without fading or flaking\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePolyester\/nylon build\u003c\/strong\u003e that handles daily wear without falling apart\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs This a Good Gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOne of the best, actually. Everyone knows someone who runs on spite and iced coffee.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHand them the I Love Hating hat and watch their eyes light up for possibly the first time all year. It's the kind of gift that says \"I see you, and I respect the darkness.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat adjustable?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. Snapback closure in the back fits most head sizes. One size, minimal drama.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the hat made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eStructured polyester foam front with mesh back panels. Lightweight, breathable, and built for daily wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or peel?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. The design is printed directly into the material so it stays sharp without fading or flaking.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDepends on your workplace. If HR already has a file on you, this hat probably won't make it worse.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ White \/ Black","offer_id":42012844720210,"sku":"3138608_15908","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White","offer_id":42012844785746,"sku":"3138608_15905","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Royal \/ Red","offer_id":42012844752978,"sku":"3138608_15909","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Love_Hating_Funny_Sayings_Trucker_Hat_For_Men_Crazy_Mesh_Hat.jpg?v=1762481905"},{"product_id":"autism-powered-fuck-machine-hat","title":"Autism Powered Fuck Machine Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Autism Powered Fuck Machine Hat from Unethical Threads is for people who turned their diagnosis into a flex and refuse to be quiet about it. Structured cotton front, mesh back, and a statement that hits before you even open your mouth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually wearing this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNeurodivergent people who own it completely. The ones who made peace with the way their brain works and decided the rest of the world can keep up or get out of the way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou know the friend who hyperfocused on something for 14 hours straight and emerged looking slightly feral? The one who can drop encyclopedic knowledge on their niche interest but forgot to eat lunch? That person already has this hat in their cart.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured cotton front panels\u003c\/strong\u003e that keep the message crisp and readable\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e, because your brain already runs hot enough\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e that fits most head sizes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCurved bill\u003c\/strong\u003e, pre-shaped so you're ready to go right out of the box\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDurable print\u003c\/strong\u003e that won't crack, peel, or fade when you inevitably wear this three days in a row\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eCan I give this as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly if you actually know the person. This is a gift for someone who already makes these jokes about themselves, not a random grab for a white elephant exchange.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor the right person (your neurodivergent partner, sibling, best friend), this is the kind of gift that gets worn immediately and often. They'll think of you every time someone in public does a visible double take.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTo some people, absolutely. To the people it's made for, it's the funniest thing they own. Know your audience.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat size is this trucker hat?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOne size fits most. The adjustable snapback closure in the back handles the rest.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or crack?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. The print is made to hold up through regular washing. Just skip the dryer to keep it looking its best.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this actually for autistic people?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's for anyone who thinks it's funny. But it hits different when it's your own joke to make.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Light Pink \/ White \/ Light Pink","offer_id":42012844949586,"sku":"2311174_16750","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ White \/ Black","offer_id":42012844982354,"sku":"2311174_15908","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Royal \/ Red","offer_id":42012845015122,"sku":"2311174_15909","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White","offer_id":42012845047890,"sku":"2311174_15905","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/foam-trucker-hat-light-pink-white-light-pink-one-size-back-67ed525ae541a.jpg?v=1762481906"},{"product_id":"i-eat-drywall-funny-weird-trucker-hat","title":"I Eat Drywall Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Eat Drywall Hat from Unethical Threads is a trucker hat for people whose sense of humor peaked somewhere between \"chaotic\" and \"concerning.\" It says what it says. You either get it or you're Googling it right now, and both outcomes are funny.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears a hat that says I Eat Drywall?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eContractors, gym bros, and anyone who peaked in a group chat. This is the hat equivalent of a personality test nobody asked you to take.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf someone at Home Depot nods at you while you're wearing this, that's your new best friend. You don't choose the drywall life, but you can certainly advertise it on your forehead.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStructured cotton front panels\u003c\/strong\u003e that hold the absurdity upright\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBreathable mesh back\u003c\/strong\u003e so your head gets airflow even when your decisions don't deserve respect\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eAdjustable snapback closure\u003c\/strong\u003e fits most skulls, even the thick ones\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePrinted design that holds up\u003c\/strong\u003e through washes and questionable life choices\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic curved brim\u003c\/strong\u003e for that \"I swear I'm normal\" silhouette\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eDoes this work as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a perfect gift if you know the person well enough to insult them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBirthday, White Elephant, \"sorry about what I said at Thanksgiving,\" whatever the occasion. The I Eat Drywall Hat works because it requires no explanation and offers none. Hand it over. Watch their face. That's the whole gift.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the I Eat Drywall Hat fit big heads?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe snapback closure adjusts to fit most head sizes. If your head is truly enormous, you probably already know which hats work for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe design holds up through regular washes. Skip the bleach, don't iron directly on the print, and you're good.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this hat structured or floppy?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eStructured front panels keep the design looking sharp. The mesh back is flexible for comfort.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDepends on your workplace. If your boss has a sense of humor, go for it. If not, that sounds like a you problem.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42012846719058,"sku":"4811494_15904","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Eat_Drywall_Funny_Hats_For_Men_Weird_Inappropriate_Trucker_Hat_Front_View.jpg?v=1762481907"},{"product_id":"men-eat-what-donkey-t-shirt-funny-inappropriate-ass-adult-humor-tee","title":"*NEW* Men Eat What? Donkey Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Men Eat What? Donkey Tee from Unethical Threads is exactly as unhinged as it sounds. Two startled donkeys. One very loaded question. If you know, you know, and if you don't, this shirt isn't for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's actually buying this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who don't need the joke explained to them. Your friend group's designated chaos agent, the person at the cookout who says what everyone else is thinking. If your humor runs dark and your wardrobe runs loud, welcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper freebie from a 5K\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e (yes, we see you, big guys)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e because some things don't need reinventing\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors don't bail after the first wash. Unlike your dignity.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePre-shrunk.\u003c\/strong\u003e We thought of everything except your reputation.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the best kind of gift. The kind that makes someone laugh so hard they forget to say thank you. Perfect for birthdays, bachelor parties, or that friend whose sense of humor you've quietly admired from a safe distance. Just make sure you know your audience. If you give this to the wrong person, that's on you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does the Men Eat What Donkey shirt mean?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf you have to ask, you might not be ready. But the donkeys on this shirt look very concerned for a reason.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eRuns true to size in a relaxed, unisex fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes. Available S through 4XL.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003ePre-shrunk cotton. It holds up just fine.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDepends on where you work. If your boss laughs, you're golden. If HR has a file on you already, maybe save it for the weekend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gag gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eOne of the best. Just make sure the recipient actually has a sense of humor. We can't help you if they don't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42021085053010,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42021085085778,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42021085118546,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42021085151314,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42021085184082,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42021085216850,"sku":"MenDonkey-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Men_Eat_What_Donkey_Ass_Inappropriate_Adult_Humor_Funny_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1762481931"},{"product_id":"they-say-you-are-what-you-eat-funny-cat-adult-humor-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* They Say You Are What You Eat?! Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe \u003cem\u003eThey Say You Are What You Eat?!\u003c\/em\u003e Tee from Unethical Threads is exactly what you think it is. A terrified cat, a filthy double entendre, and the kind of shirt that makes people read it twice then snort-laugh in public. You're welcome.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who don't need jokes explained to them. Cat people with dirty minds, anyone who's ever cleared a room with a punchline, and honestly, a surprising number of gift-givers who want to watch someone unwrap this at a birthday party. It's a vibe check in cotton form, and most people pass.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with sleeves\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e from S to 4XL, so everyone gets to play\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, nothing experimental, just a solid shirt\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors don't bail on you after a few washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs well with poor decisions and even worse jokes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a fantastic gift. It's the gift that says \"I know exactly who you are and I'm not sorry about it.\" Perfect for birthdays, white elephants, bachelorette parties, or just because you saw it and immediately thought of someone specific. If you have to wonder whether they'd think it's funny, they won't. But you already know who this is for.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt run true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. It's a unisex relaxed fit, so it runs pretty standard. Check the size chart if you're between sizes, but most people are happy with their usual pick.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. It's DTG printed, meaning the ink is embedded in the fabric. No peeling, no cracking, colors stay put.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this around my family?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat depends entirely on your family. Some families would frame this. Others would schedule an intervention. You know which one yours is.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes do you carry?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. 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For the person in your life who sends you tariff memes at 2 AM, this is better than a birthday card.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor your very serious economist uncle, maybe read the room first. But honestly, if someone can't laugh at Uncle Sam going full Fabio over trade policy, that's their problem, not yours.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's pre-shrunk. The only thing getting smaller is your faith in international trade agreements.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Tariff My Clothes tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works on every body type.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or crack?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNope. DTG printing keeps the colors locked in wash after wash. 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It works as a solo statement too. 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Stop buying them another case. They already have a fridge full. Give them something they can wear to Thanksgiving dinner that makes at least one relative deeply uncomfortable. It's thoughtful in the most unhinged way possible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt actually say \"dropkick a child\"?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. It says \"I Would Dropkick A Child For A Dr Pepper.\" That is the whole shirt. You've been warned.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works for basically everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this offend people?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAlmost certainly. That's not a bug, it's the entire point. 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LGBTQ pride meets French bakery wordplay on a shirt with absolutely no chill. If you need it explained, this probably isn't your shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think the intersection of bread puns and queer joy is peak comedy. The kind of person who'd rock this at Pride, at brunch, or at Thanksgiving dinner just to watch an uncle quietly Google something under the table. It's a personality test printed on cotton.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that doesn't feel like a paper napkin with sleeves\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e in S through 4XL, because funny comes in every size\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, keeping it classic while the graphic handles the chaos\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors stay locked in (your opinions will fade before this does)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePairs well with a strong drink and stronger opinions\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly if you know the person. This isn't a safe Secret Santa pick. It's the \"I saw this and immediately thought of you\" shirt, and if that sentence doesn't apply, maybe just get them a gift card.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does Faguette mean on the shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's a mashup of exactly what you think it is. French bread meets queer slang reclamation. If you laughed, you get it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an LGBTQ pride shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes, but with the humor cranked all the way up. It's pride with a side of absurdity, which is honestly the best kind.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit, so it works for basically everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shrink in the wash?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's heavyweight cotton. Follow the care instructions and it holds up fine.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this to work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDepends entirely on your workplace. If your HR department has a sense of humor, go for it. If not, save it for the weekend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42055482507346,"sku":"Faguette-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42055482540114,"sku":"Faguette-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42055482572882,"sku":"Faguette-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42055482605650,"sku":"Faguette-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42055482638418,"sku":"Faguette-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42055482671186,"sku":"Faguette-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42055482703954,"sku":"Faguette-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42055482736722,"sku":"Faguette-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42055482769490,"sku":"Faguette-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42055482802258,"sku":"Faguette-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42055482835026,"sku":"Faguette-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42055482867794,"sku":"Faguette-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42055482900562,"sku":"Faguette-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42055482933330,"sku":"Faguette-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Faguette_Baguette_LGBTQ_Meme_Shirt.jpg?v=1762482098"},{"product_id":"fag-cigarette-pride-month-lgbtq-funny-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* Fag Cigarette Pride Month Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Fag Cigarette Pride Month Tee from Unethical Threads is a rainbow cigarette pack on your chest for Pride Month. It's British, it's queer, and it's going to make at least one person at brunch do a double take.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think Pride Month could use a little more nicotine. This tee lands with the LGBTQ crowd that refuses to be precious about language, Gen Z double-entendre collectors, and anyone whose allyship strategy includes making coworkers visibly uncomfortable in June. If your friend group has a group chat that would get you all fired, this is your uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with a screen print\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck (we know, groundbreaking)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed directly into the fabric, so the colors stay vivid long after your coworkers stop speaking to you\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eRuns true to size. When in doubt, size up.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this get me in trouble?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAlmost certainly. That's the whole point. Whether your HR department sees the humor is between you and God. This shirt splits a room in half, which is the sweet spot for any piece of clothing worth owning.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this actually a Pride shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's got rainbow colors and it says fag on it. You tell us.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Fag Cigarette tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eUnisex S through 4XL in a relaxed fit. Runs true to size, but size up if you're between sizes or like a looser look.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print hold up after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe design is DTG printed directly into the fabric. Cold wash, tumble dry low, and the colors stay put.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this going to offend people?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSome people, yes. That's never stopped us before and it's not going to start now.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I give this as a gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly if you're confident the recipient won't cry. Know your audience.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42060063211602,"sku":"BowCig-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42060063244370,"sku":"BowCig-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42060063277138,"sku":"BowCig-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42060063309906,"sku":"BowCig-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42060063342674,"sku":"BowCig-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42060063375442,"sku":"BowCig-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42060063408210,"sku":"BowCig-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42060063440978,"sku":"BowCig-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42060063473746,"sku":"BowCig-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42060063506514,"sku":"BowCig-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42060063539282,"sku":"BowCig-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42060063572050,"sku":"BowCig-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42060063604818,"sku":"BowCig-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42060063637586,"sku":"BowCig-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Fag_Cigarette_Pride_Funny_LGBTQ_T_Shirt.png?v=1762482113"},{"product_id":"i-would-dropkick-a-child-for-a-coca-cola-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* I Would Dropkick A Child For A Coca Cola Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Would Dropkick A Child For A Coca Cola tee is Unethical Threads doing what we do best: saying the quiet part loud, on a shirt. It's a Coca-Cola parody for people whose humor never left the group chat. Unhinged? Obviously.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think soda brand loyalty is a personality trait and child safety is negotiable. Your friend who says the worst thing at the barbecue and somehow still gets invited back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf your love for Coca-Cola borders on criminal, this is your uniform. The Dropkick series is one of our biggest lines for a reason. People see it, they get it, they want one for every brand they'd commit a minor felony over.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a see-through napkin\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S to 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e (yes, even the big soda enthusiasts are covered)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e because we're unhinged, not experimental\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG-printed graphic\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds its color wash after wash, no cracking or peeling\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eNo, you can't actually dropkick children. But you can look like you'd consider it.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. It's the funniest thing you can hand a Coca-Cola fan who doesn't scare easily.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDark humor lovers, meme-fluent coworkers, the friend who always takes the joke one step too far. If you know someone who'd read \"I Would Dropkick A Child For A Coca Cola\" and immediately say \"where do I buy this,\" you already know this is the move. Birthday, holiday, gag gift exchange, whatever. It lands.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the I Would Dropkick A Child For A Coca Cola shirt true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt runs unisex relaxed fit. If you want it fitted, go with your normal size. If you want that oversized look, size up one.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shirt get me in trouble?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat depends entirely on where you wear it and how fast you can run. We've seen everything from laughs to horrified double takes. Wear at your own risk.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the print quality like?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDTG printed directly into the fabric. The colors won't crack, peel, or fade into a sad ghost of themselves after a few washes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I return it if my family disowns me?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWe have a return policy, but we can't return your family's respect. Check our return page for the details.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this come in kids' sizes?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. And given the subject matter, that's probably for the best.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42140160950354,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42140160983122,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42140161015890,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42140161048658,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42140161081426,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42140161114194,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42140161146962,"sku":"KickerCCC-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Would_Dropkick_A_Child_For_A_Coca_Cola_Funny_Graphic_Gift_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1757010792"},{"product_id":"dr-pegger-funny-inappropriate-soda-gag-gift-t-shirt","title":"Dr Pegger Soda Parody Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Dr Pegger Soda Parody Tee from Unethical Threads takes a beloved soda brand and drags it somewhere deeply inappropriate. If you know, you know. If you don't, someone at the cookout will explain it while your aunt covers her mouth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think soda puns peaked when they got dirty. Couples who enjoy a public double take. Your friend who treats every group chat like an open mic night.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt isn't subtle, and neither are the people who buy it. It's the kind of tee that gets a slow head shake from your dad and an immediate \"where'd you get that\" from everyone else. If your humor lives in the gutter, welcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a napkin with a screen print\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, because we're classy like that\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the colors don't bail after three washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eYes, you can wear it to a barbecue. No, you probably shouldn't wear it to church.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf the recipient sends memes at 2 AM, absolutely.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect for birthdays, white elephants, or any occasion where you want to be remembered as \"that friend.\" It walks the line between thoughtful and unhinged, which is honestly the best kind of gift. Just make sure the person you're buying it for has a sense of humor. We can't help you if they don't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Dr Pegger tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. It's a unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfy no matter your build.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's DTG printed, meaning the ink is in the fabric, not sitting on top. Cold wash, tumble dry low, and it holds up.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an official Dr Pepper product?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. This is a parody. Dr Pepper did not approve this, and we respect that they probably never will.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat if the person I'm gifting this to doesn't get the joke?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThen you've learned something important about that person. No refunds on that revelation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42145185202258,"sku":"ThePegg-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42145185235026,"sku":"ThePegg-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42145185267794,"sku":"ThePegg-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42145185300562,"sku":"ThePegg-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42145185333330,"sku":"ThePegg-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42145185366098,"sku":"ThePegg-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42145185398866,"sku":"ThePegg-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42145185431634,"sku":"ThePegg-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42145185464402,"sku":"ThePegg-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42145185497170,"sku":"ThePegg-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42145185529938,"sku":"ThePegg-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42145185562706,"sku":"ThePegg-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42145185595474,"sku":"ThePegg-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42145185628242,"sku":"ThePegg-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Dr_Pegger_Soda_Parody_Gag_Gift_White_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1757546217"},{"product_id":"tylenol-extra-autism-parody-funny-t-shirt","title":"*NEW* Tylenol Extra Autism Parody Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Tylenol Extra Autism parody tee from Unethical Threads takes that viral conspiracy theory and puts it right on your chest. If you know, you know. If you don't, this probably isn't for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople whose group chats have a body count.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe kind of person whose humor runs dark enough that their friends stopped being surprised years ago. If your sense of humor has ever made a therapist pause and scribble something down, welcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with a collar\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck, because we're unhinged, not animals\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the colors stay vivid long after your reputation doesn't\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePre-shrunk fabric, same fit after every wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. That's sort of the entire point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you're shopping at a store called Unethical Threads expecting grandma-approved apparel, you may have taken a wrong turn somewhere. This one's for people who laugh at things they probably shouldn't, and have made peace with that.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an official Tylenol product?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. This is a parody tee. Tylenol has nothing to do with this, and we're pretty sure they'd prefer to keep it that way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works for basically everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNope. DTG (direct to garment) printing keeps the colors locked in wash after wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you know someone who'd think this is funny, absolutely. If you have to wonder whether they'd be offended, maybe stick with a gift card.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt actually cause autism?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. It's a shirt. Come on.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42159198044242,"sku":"EATism-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42159198077010,"sku":"EATism-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42159198109778,"sku":"EATism-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42159198142546,"sku":"EATism-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42159198175314,"sku":"EATism-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42159198208082,"sku":"EATism-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42159198240850,"sku":"EATism-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Tylenol_Extra_Autism_Meme_T_Shirt.jpg?v=1758751870"},{"product_id":"i-need-a-hug-from-a-bad-bitch-t-shirt","title":"I Need A Hug From A Bad Bitch Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Need A Hug From A Bad Bitch tee from Unethical Threads is for people who need emotional support but have very specific standards about where it comes from. This is not a cry for help. It's a job posting.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho Actually Wears This?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who are somehow both emotionally damaged and incredibly picky about it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou've got your post-breakup crowd, the perpetually single by choice (sure) crew, and the people who say \"I'm fine\" twelve times a day. If you've ever left someone on read and then wondered why nobody loves you, this shirt already knows.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with sleeves\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e from S to 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck.\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic. Nothing weird happening up top\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG print\u003c\/strong\u003e that holds color through the wash. Your standards might fade. The print won't\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePreshrunk\u003c\/strong\u003e so it still fits after you stress-eat your way through a situationship\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs This a Good Gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. Immediately yes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is the gift you get someone when a Hallmark card feels too sincere. Works for birthdays, breakups, or that friend who won't stop posting about their ex. If they need a hug from a bad bitch, the least you can do is point them in the right direction.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this run true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. Unisex relaxed fit, available S through 4XL. Between sizes? Go up one.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. It's a DTG print, meaning the ink is embedded in the fabric. It holds up wash after wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this appropriate to wear in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat depends on your crowd. We sell the shirt. What happens after that is between you and society.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat material is this made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eHeavyweight cotton. Thick enough to feel substantial, soft enough that you'll actually want to wear it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes it shrink in the wash?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's preshrunk. Wash it however you want. It's not going anywhere.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42170630471762,"sku":"HugByB-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42170630504530,"sku":"HugByB-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42170630537298,"sku":"HugByB-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42170630570066,"sku":"HugByB-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42170630602834,"sku":"HugByB-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42170630635602,"sku":"HugByB-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42170630668370,"sku":"HugByB-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42170630701138,"sku":"HugByB-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42170630733906,"sku":"HugByB-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42170630766674,"sku":"HugByB-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42170630799442,"sku":"HugByB-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42170630832210,"sku":"HugByB-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42170630864978,"sku":"HugByB-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42170630897746,"sku":"HugByB-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Need_A_Hug_From_A_Bad_Bitch_Black_Shirt.jpg?v=1759770584"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/collections\/Funny_Unisex_T_Shirts.jpg?v=1761607993","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/collections\/funny-unisex-t-shirts.oembed","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}