{"product_id":"are-you-an-escalator-cuz-i-wanna-go-down-on-you-funny-t-shirt","title":"Are You An Escalator Cuz I Wanna Go Down On You Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Are You An Escalator Cuz I Wanna Go Down On You Tee is a pickup line so bad it wraps back around to brilliant. Unethical Threads put it on heavyweight cotton so you can wear your worst impulse in public. It's flirty, stupid, and somehow still charming.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho Actually Wears This?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who peaked at bar trivia and aren't sorry about it. If your sense of humor runs somewhere between \"dad joke\" and \"HR violation,\" this is your lane.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWorks for nights out, lazy Sundays, or basically any situation where you've decided subtlety isn't on the menu. Pair it with confidence or at least plausible deniability.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that doesn't fall apart after three washes like that gas station tee you're still wearing\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck (because v-necks are a whole different energy)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed for color that actually sticks around\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMachine washable, turn inside out if you want to be nice about it\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs This a Good Gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a perfect gift for someone you know well enough to buy something inappropriate for. Not your coworker's retirement party (unless you really know the room).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThink: best friends, partners who appreciate a terrible pun, or that person in your life who already owns at least two shirts that make people uncomfortable. If they laugh at the escalator line, they'll love having it on their chest.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable on everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDTG printing holds its color. Turn it inside out and wash cold if you want to keep it looking sharp for years.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt appropriate for work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThat depends entirely on where you work. Probably not most offices. Definitely yes if you work from home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the shirt made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eHeavyweight cotton with real weight to it, not that tissue-paper-thin stuff.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this around my parents?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYou can wear it anywhere. Whether you should is a different question.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42533140824146,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42533140856914,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42533140889682,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42533140922450,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42533140955218,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42533140987986,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42533141020754,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42533141053522,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42533141086290,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42533141119058,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42533141151826,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42533141184594,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42533141217362,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42533141250130,"sku":"AreYouAnEscalatorF-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Are_You_An_Escalator_Cuz_I_Wanna_Go_Down_On_You_Funny_T_Shirt_Black.png?v=1785701935","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/are-you-an-escalator-cuz-i-wanna-go-down-on-you-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}