*NEW* Chewy The Raccoon Tee

The Chewy The Raccoon Tee from Unethical Threads is the only appropriate response to a raccoon getting busted with a meth pipe on live television. If you saw that story and your first thought was "I need that on a shirt," congratulations, you're our people.

Who's actually buying this?

People who watched the Chewy news segment and immediately sent it to every group chat they're in. The overlap between "follows local news for the chaos" and "owns too many graphic tees" is a perfect circle, and you're standing in the middle of it. This isn't for people who need the joke explained. If you know, you know.

• Heavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a costume
• Unisex relaxed fit from S to 4XL (yes, 4XL, we don't gatekeep)
• Crew neck, because we're keeping at least one thing traditional here
• DTG printed so the colors stay vivid through every wash, no cracking, no peeling
• Preshrunk, so what you order is what you get

Is this actually a good gift?

It's the best gift for the friend who texted you the Chewy story at 2 AM. Birthdays, white elephants, "I saw this and thought of you" moments. This is a shirt that says you pay attention to what actually makes someone laugh, not just what's safe. Fair warning: your coworkers might have questions at the next casual Friday.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the Chewy The Raccoon shirt about?
It's based on the viral news story about Chewy, the raccoon found with a meth pipe. The internet lost its mind, and we turned it into a tee.

What sizes does this come in?
S through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit so it runs comfortable on everyone.

Will the print fade or crack?
Nope. DTG (direct to garment) printing keeps the colors locked in. No cracking, no peeling, no fading.

Is this shirt going to offend people?
Depends on how you feel about raccoons and questionable life choices. It's funny, not mean. But know your audience.

What's the shirt material like?
Heavyweight cotton with a relaxed fit. Feels substantial, not flimsy.