{"product_id":"dont-shoot-im-white-tee-funny-t-shirt","title":"Don't Shoot I'm White Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Don't Shoot I'm White Tee from Unethical Threads is the kind of shirt that makes a room go quiet. Deadpan, unfiltered, and absolutely not for everyone. If you have to ask whether you can pull it off, you already have your answer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who don't flinch. The Don't Shoot I'm White Tee is for the person who treats uncomfortable silence like applause.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou know the type. They're the one at the barbecue who says the thing everyone else was thinking but would never put on a shirt. This isn't a cry for attention. It's proof that you genuinely do not care who's uncomfortable, as long as you're the one laughing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that holds up better than your reputation will\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S-4XL (yes, your uncle can get in on this too)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck, because at least one thing about this shirt should be classic\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG print for lasting color. The joke stays sharp, trust us\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAvailable in black or white\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAbsolutely. The Don't Shoot I'm White Tee is not subtle, not apologetic, and not trying to be liked. It is the bluntest thing in your closet and it does not care about your coworker's feelings.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you're buying this as a gift, make sure the recipient is the kind of person who laughs at things other people write apology posts about. If they're not that person, you just bought the funniest shirt nobody will ever wear outside the house.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually as bad as it sounds?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWorse, probably. The Don't Shoot I'm White Tee is designed to get a reaction, and it has never once failed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works on pretty much anybody brave enough to wear it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDTG printed for lasting color. This thing holds up just fine in the wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly if you know the person well enough to be confident they won't disown you. When in doubt, go with a gift card.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat colors does it come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBlack or white. Both equally effective at making strangers avoid eye contact.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42657507704914,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42657507737682,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42657507770450,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42657507803218,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42657507835986,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42657507868754,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42657507901522,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42657507934290,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42657507967058,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42657507999826,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42657508032594,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42657508065362,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42657508098130,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42657508130898,"sku":"DontShootImWhiteF-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Dont_Shoot_Im_White_Tee_Funny_T_Shirt_Black.png?v=1787924081","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/dont-shoot-im-white-tee-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}