*NEW* Every Cigarette Brings Harambe Tee

The Every Cigarette Brings You 11 Minutes Closer to Harambe tee from Unethical Threads. Because if you're going to slowly kill yourself, at least you're getting closer to a legend. This is the shirt for people who never really moved on from 2016.

Who actually wears this?

People who peaked when Harambe died and are completely fine with that. If your group chat still drops "dicks out" references, you already know.

This is the intersection of nicotine humor and gorilla grief that somehow exists and somehow works. You don't need to be a smoker, but it helps if you have at least one vice you're not sorry about.

• Heavyweight cotton that feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper freebie from a 5K you didn't finish
• Unisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL (big guys get memes too)
• Crew neck, because we're unhinged, not feral
• DTG printed so the graphic stays sharp and the colors don't bail on you
• Pairs well with questionable life choices and bar patios

Is this a good gift?

It's a great gift if you actually know the person.

This is not a safe pick from a gift guide. It's for the friend who sends unhinged memes at 2 AM and never apologizes. If they still reference Harambe in 2026, they deserve this shirt. If they don't get it, you need better friends.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is this shirt really about Harambe?

Yes. It's a tribute to the gorilla who united the internet in grief, printed on heavyweight cotton so his memory lives on.

Will this offend people?

Probably. That's kind of the point. If you're asking, you already know your audience.

What sizes does this come in?

S through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.

Does the print fade or crack?

No. DTG printing keeps the colors locked in. Your commitment to the bit will outlast the shirt itself.