{"product_id":"every-day-im-a-fresh-runny-smell-tee-funny-t-shirt","title":"Every Day I'm A Fresh Runny Smell Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Every Day I'm A Fresh Runny Smell Tee from Unethical Threads takes that brooding \"every day is a fresh new hell\" slogan and shuffles the words until it says something profoundly stupider. You recognize the original. Then you read what this one actually says. Then you need a second.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who were going to buy the nihilist version and thought, nah, too earnest. This is for anyone who'd rather be confusing than relatable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt reads like a vaguely philosophical statement from across the room. Up close it's just quietly announcing something unfortunate about yourself. That gap gets funnier every time someone squints at your chest and tilts their head.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue-thin suggestion of one\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e, because existential dread and its dumber cousin come in every size\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, classic, nothing weird going on up top\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e so the text keeps its color instead of ghosting after a few washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAvailable in \u003cstrong\u003eblack or white\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a near-perfect gift for anyone who posts that \"fresh new hell\" quote unironically.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWatch them read it, pause, read it again, and then either love you or quietly reconsider the friendship. There is no middle ground with this shirt. Honestly, that's what makes it worth wrapping.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does \"Every Day I'm A Fresh Runny Smell\" mean?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a scrambled version of the popular nihilist slogan \"every day is a fresh new hell.\" Same energy, much worse outcome.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this shirt come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade after washing?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe DTG print is made to hold its color. Follow the care instructions and it stays sharp.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this come in other colors?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt comes in black or white.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this an actual phrase or did someone just mash up words?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSomeone mashed up words. Specifically, the words from \"every day is a fresh new hell.\" The result is somehow worse than the original sentiment, which is impressive.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42733920190546,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42733920223314,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42733920256082,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42733920288850,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42733920321618,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42733920354386,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42733920387154,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42733920419922,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42733920452690,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42733920485458,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42733920518226,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42733920550994,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42733920583762,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42733920616530,"sku":"EverydayImAFreshRunnySmellF-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Every_Day_Im_A_Fresh_Runny_Smell_Tee_Funny_T_Shirt_Black.png?v=1789387467","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/every-day-im-a-fresh-runny-smell-tee-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}