{"product_id":"hair-would-only-slow-me-down-tee-backprint-funny-t-shirt","title":"Hair Would Only Slow Me Down Tee (BACKPRINT)","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Hair Would Only Slow Me Down tee from Unethical Threads is bald-guy confidence printed on the back of a heavyweight cotton shirt. Available in black or white, S through 4XL. It's the funniest gift you can hand a bald dad, husband, or friend, and they'll actually wear it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's this actually for?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAny bald (or balding) guy who stopped grieving and started flexing. The text sits across the back of the shirt, so people only read it as you walk past them. Which is the most aerodynamic way to deliver a punchline.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt also works if you're the person shopping for that bald guy. You already know who you're thinking of. Get him this instead of another beanie.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that doesn't go see-through after three washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S to 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e (yes, your big bald uncle is covered)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e for color that sticks around longer than your hairline did\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDesign on the back.\u003c\/strong\u003e Front is blank. Aerodynamics, remember?\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift for a bald guy?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's basically the ideal gift for any bald person with a pulse and a sense of humor. Father's Day, birthdays, Christmas, \"I noticed you stopped buying shampoo\" day.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf the bald guy in your life can laugh at himself, this lands every time. And if he can't? That's a bigger problem than this shirt can solve, but it's a start.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does the shirt say?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eHAIR WOULD ONLY SLOW ME DOWN, printed in stacked text across the back. The front is completely blank.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat colors is it available in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack or white.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this a good Father's Day gift?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf your dad is bald and has a sense of humor, yes. If he's bald and doesn't have a sense of humor, also yes. He needs this more than you think.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or crack?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's DTG printed directly into the fabric, so no cracking or peeling. Follow the care instructions and it'll hold up.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42632137605202,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42632137637970,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42632137670738,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42632137703506,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42632137736274,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42632137769042,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42632137801810,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42632137834578,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42632137867346,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42632137900114,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42632137932882,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42632137965650,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42632137998418,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42632138031186,"sku":"HairWouldOnlySlowMeDownB-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Hair_Would_Only_Slow_Me_Down_Tee__BACKPRINT__Funny_T_Shirt_Black.png?v=1787076694","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/hair-would-only-slow-me-down-tee-backprint-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}