{"product_id":"hot-dog-powered-fuck-machine-tee-funny-t-shirt-1","title":"Hot Dog Powered Fuck Machine Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Hot Dog Powered Fuck Machine Tee from Unethical Threads is exactly what it sounds like, and no, we're not going to explain it further. Heavyweight cotton graphic tee for anyone who saw the name and immediately hit \"add to cart\" instead of asking questions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho Actually Wears This?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who think absurdity is an underappreciated art form. Your friend group has a spectrum, and you're the one on the far end that everyone warns new people about.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is not a shirt for people who test the waters. This is for people who cannonball into the deep end wearing cargo shorts and a grin. You already know if you're that person. The fact that you're still reading confirms it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a translucent napkin from a gas station giveaway\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S to 4XL\u003c\/strong\u003e, because poor decisions should be inclusive\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck\u003c\/strong\u003e, classic and simple (the shirt handles the chaos department)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG print\u003c\/strong\u003e for colors that stay vivid no matter how many times you wash it\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMachine washable\u003c\/strong\u003e, which you'll need after the reactions you get wearing this in public\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eCan I Give This as a Gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAbsolutely, if you know your audience. This is the gift equivalent of a trust fall. You either have the kind of friendship where this lands perfectly, or you're about to find out you don't.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBirthdays, white elephant exchanges, bachelor parties. Anywhere the bar for taste is already on the floor. Wrap it in tissue paper and hand it over with a straight face for maximum effect.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does the design look like?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's a hot dog with an energy and attitude that the product name accurately describes. Check the photos above for the full picture.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes this shirt run true to size?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's a relaxed unisex fit. If you're between sizes, go with your usual. The relaxed cut gives you room without looking like a tent.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the print going to crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNope. DTG printing bonds the ink directly into the fabric, so it holds up through the wash cycle without peeling or fading.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this get me weird looks in public?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. That is the entire point. If you wanted subtle, you would not be shopping at Unethical Threads.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the return policy?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCheck the return policy page on our site. But honestly, once you put this on, you're not sending it back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42379822465106,"sku":"HotDogMachineTeeWF-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42379822497874,"sku":"HotDogMachineTeeWF-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42379822530642,"sku":"HotDogMachineTeeWF-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42379822563410,"sku":"HotDogMachineTeeWF-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42379822596178,"sku":"HotDogMachineTeeWF-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42379822628946,"sku":"HotDogMachineTeeWF-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42379822661714,"sku":"HotDogMachineTeeWF-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Hot_Dog_Powered_Fuck_Machine_Tee_Funny_T_Shirt_5679c6d1-9230-480d-8bdd-78a4a9c0e40e.png?v=1777215912","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/hot-dog-powered-fuck-machine-tee-funny-t-shirt-1","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}