{"product_id":"i-didnt-drink-for-12-years-then-i-turned-13-funny-t-shirt","title":"I Didn't Drink For 12 Years Then I Turned 13 Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Didn't Drink For 12 Years Then I Turned 13 Tee by Unethical Threads is sarcastic drinking humor wrapped in tropical cocktail artwork. The setup sounds like a sobriety milestone, and it is absolutely not. A funny graphic tee for the bar, the cruise, or anywhere decisions go sideways.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho wears a shirt like this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnyone who finds fake sobriety announcements funny. This is a vacation drinking shirt, a cruise tee, a bar-night go-to.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe tropical cocktail artwork gives it genuine holiday-shirt energy, so it fits right in at the resort pool, the beach bar, or the family cookout where your uncle already has opinions about your life choices. It's also a dead-simple sarcastic gift for the friend who treats every drink like a personal milestone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that doesn't feel like a tissue paper compromise\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S-4XL.\u003c\/strong\u003e Everyone's covered.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck.\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic. Nothing wild here.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG print\u003c\/strong\u003e for color that outlasts your questionable laundry habits\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAvailable in black or white\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. Easily.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe bar for a funny shirt gift is this: does the person drink, do they have a sense of humor, and will they actually wear it? This clears all three. The tropical artwork makes it read as a vacation shirt, not a cry for help, so it's appropriate enough to hand someone at a birthday party. Probably.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this shirt come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. It's a DTG (direct-to-garment) print, which means the ink is in the fabric, not sitting on top of it. It holds up through regular washing without cracking or peeling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat colors does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBlack and white.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's a joke about being thirteen. If that offends someone, they're probably too young to read the shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I wear this on a cruise?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat's basically what it was designed for. Tropical artwork, drinking humor, vacation energy. You'll blend right in at the pool bar.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42772350009426,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42772350042194,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42772350074962,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42772350107730,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42772350140498,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42772350173266,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42772350206034,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42772350238802,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42772350271570,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42772350304338,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42772350337106,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42772350369874,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42772350402642,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42772350435410,"sku":"IDidntDrinkFor12YearsF-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Didnt_Drink_For_12_Years_Then_I_Turned_13_Funny_T_Shirt_Black.png?v=1790942369","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/i-didnt-drink-for-12-years-then-i-turned-13-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}