{"product_id":"i-support-whatever-benefits-me-tee-funny-t-shirt","title":"I Support Whatever Benefits Me Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Support Whatever Benefits Me Tee from Unethical Threads is the mission statement nobody asked for but everyone secretly operates by. Three lines of block text across the chest, no graphic, no subtlety. Available in black or white.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who stopped pretending their loyalty isn't transactional.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe friend who switches restaurant picks based on who's paying. The coworker who only volunteers for projects with visible credit. Your entire group chat when someone suggests plans that require driving. This is for anyone who's honest about the math they're already doing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that doesn't go see-through after three washes (you're welcome)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic crew neck\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG (direct-to-garment) print for color that doesn't crack, peel, or ghost\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAvailable in black or white, because even your self-interest deserves options\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the best gift for someone who's already given up pretending to be noble.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBirthdays, holidays, office Secret Santa where you drew the person who always takes credit for group projects. The I Support Whatever Benefits Me Tee works because it's not mean, it's just true. Nobody can get mad at you for stating a universal human condition. Well, they can. But they'd be proving your point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the I Support Whatever Benefits Me Tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable on everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print fade or crack?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. DTG printing bonds the ink directly into the fabric. It holds up through repeated washing without cracking, peeling, or fading.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat colors does this shirt come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBlack or white. Pick whichever benefits you most.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOnly to people who haven't admitted they do the exact same thing. So yes, possibly.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat material is it made from?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeavyweight cotton. Thick enough to feel substantial, not so thick you overheat at a casual lunch.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42659263774802,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42659263807570,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42659263840338,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42659263873106,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42659263905874,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42659263938642,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42659263971410,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42659264004178,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42659264036946,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42659264069714,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42659264102482,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42659264135250,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42659264168018,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42659264200786,"sku":"ISupportWhateverBenefitsMeF-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Support_Whatever_Benefits_Me_Tee_Funny_T_Shirt_Black.png?v=1788035244","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/i-support-whatever-benefits-me-tee-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}