{"product_id":"i-would-dropkick-a-child-for-a-patron-tee-backprint-funny-t-shirt","title":"I Would Dropkick A Child For A Patron Tee (BACKPRINT)","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe I Would Dropkick A Child For A Patron Tee is exactly what it sounds like. Part of the Dropkick series from Unethical Threads, printed on heavyweight cotton, worn by people who love Patron more than they love being polite.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\u003cp\u003ePeople who don't apologize for their drink order. The Dropkick series is for the crowd that picks a bit and commits to it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYou wear this to the cookout, someone reads your back, and now you've got a new best friend or a new enemy. Either way, you're having a better time than the guy in the plain polo.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e100% heavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with a neck hole\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit\u003c\/strong\u003e, sizes S to 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck, short sleeve\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG print\u003c\/strong\u003e (direct-to-garment) so the colors don't bail after three washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBackprint placement\u003c\/strong\u003e, because the best jokes land when you're walking away\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003ch2\u003eIs this a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\u003cp\u003eAbsolutely, if you actually know the person. This is the shirt you buy for the friend who already says \"dropkick a child\" at brunch.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNot for your coworker you've spoken to twice. Know your audience and this thing lands every time.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes the print hold up in the wash?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYes. DTG printing bonds the ink directly into the fabric. Turn it inside out, wash cold, and the design stays locked in.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. The fit is unisex and true to size, so order your normal size.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the design on the front or the back?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBackprint only. The front is clean, the back does all the talking.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shrink?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMinimal shrinkage if you follow care instructions. Wash cold, tumble dry low. Heavyweight cotton holds its shape better than lightweight tees.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt actually offensive?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eDepends on who you ask. It's a joke. If someone can't handle it, that's a them problem, not a you problem.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cscript type=\"application\/ld+json\"\u003e\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"FAQPage\",\n  \"mainEntity\": [\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"Does the print hold up in the wash?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"Yes. DTG printing bonds the ink directly into the fabric. Turn it inside out, wash cold, and the design stays locked in.\"\n      }\n    },\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"What sizes does this come in?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"S through 4XL. The fit is unisex and true to size, so order your normal size.\"\n      }\n    },\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"Is the design on the front or the back?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"Backprint only. The front is clean, the back does all the talking.\"\n      }\n    },\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"Will this shrink?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"Minimal shrinkage if you follow care instructions. Wash cold, tumble dry low. Heavyweight cotton holds its shape better than lightweight tees.\"\n      }\n    },\n    {\n      \"@type\": \"Question\",\n      \"name\": \"Is this shirt actually offensive?\",\n      \"acceptedAnswer\": {\n        \"@type\": \"Answer\",\n        \"text\": \"Depends on who you ask. It's a joke. If someone can't handle it, that's a them problem, not a you problem.\"\n      }\n    }\n  ]\n}\n\u003c\/script\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42375206830162,"sku":"DropKickPatBack-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42375206862930,"sku":"DropKickPatBack-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42375206895698,"sku":"DropKickPatBack-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42375206928466,"sku":"DropKickPatBack-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42375206961234,"sku":"DropKickPatBack-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42375206994002,"sku":"DropKickPatBack-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42375207026770,"sku":"DropKickPatBack-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/I_Would_Dropkick_A_Child_For_A_Patron_Tee__BACKPRINT__Funny_T_Shirt.png?v=1776778703","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/i-would-dropkick-a-child-for-a-patron-tee-backprint-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}