{"product_id":"introvert-do-not-disturb-unless-crab-rangoon-backprint-funny-t-shirt","title":"Introvert Do Not Disturb Unless Crab Rangoon Tee (BACKPRINT)","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Introvert Do Not Disturb Unless Crab Rangoon tee from Unethical Threads draws one hard boundary, then names the single food that overrides it. Design's on the back, so the person behind you in the takeout line knows the terms upfront.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's this actually for?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who've memorized the crab rangoon ranking of every Chinese restaurant in a 10-mile radius.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou know the golden-to-cream-cheese ratio that separates acceptable from transcendent. You cancel plans without guilt but will absolutely open the door for whoever shows up with a warm bag from the right spot. This shirt says all of that without you having to speak to anyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that holds up to repeat couch sessions\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck, clean front, design on the back where it belongs\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG print that keeps its color longer than you keep your patience for small talk\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAvailable in black or white\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eDoes this work as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfectly.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the ideal introvert gift because you can leave it at their door, text \"check your porch,\" and walk away. No forced interaction. No performative gratitude. Just a shirt that says exactly what they've been thinking, paired with the one food exception that proves they're human. Throw in an order of crab rangoon and you've just become the only person they'll answer the phone for.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the design on the front or back of the shirt?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIt's on the back. The front stays clean. People behind you get the message.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL. If you're between sizes, size up. Comfort is the whole point.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print hold up in the wash?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eYes. DTG printing locks the color in. Turn it inside out, wash cold, and it'll outlast your interest in leaving the house.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat colors is this shirt available in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack or white. Pick based on your current feelings about humanity.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this actually funny?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eIf you've ever negotiated your own solitude with an exception clause for a specific appetizer, yes. If not, it might just confuse you, and that's fine too.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42767540355154,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42767540387922,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42767540420690,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42767540453458,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42767540486226,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42767540518994,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42767540551762,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42767540584530,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42767540617298,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42767540650066,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42767540682834,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42767540715602,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42767540748370,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42767540781138,"sku":"IntrovertDoNotDisturbCrabRangoonB-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Introvert_Do_Not_Disturb_Unless_Crab_Rangoon__BACKPRINT__Funny_T_Shirt_Black.png?v=1790678477","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/introvert-do-not-disturb-unless-crab-rangoon-backprint-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}