Lord Of The CockRings Tee

The Lord Of The CockRings Tee from Unethical Threads is exactly what Tolkien would have made if he'd had a few more drinks and way fewer editors. Heavyweight cotton, unisex fit, and a punchline that does all the talking for you.

Who's actually wearing this?

People who think Middle-earth needed more adult content. The kind of person who names their fantasy football team something HR would flag.

If you've ever made a Lord of the Rings joke that cleared a room, this shirt was designed with you in mind. It's also weirdly popular with groomsmen groups, which tells you everything you need to know about the state of modern weddings.

• Heavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with a screen print on it
• Unisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL
• Crew neck, because you're classy like that
• DTG printed, so the colors don't bail on you after three washes
• One ring to rule them all, but make it inappropriate

Can I give this as a gift?

Yes, and you should.

This is the gift for the friend who's impossible to shop for because they already own everything normal. Wrap it, don't explain it, watch them lose it. Works for birthdays, White Elephant, bachelor parties, or just because you want to be someone's favorite person for a day.

Frequently Asked Questions

• What sizes does the Lord Of The CockRings Tee come in? Sizes S through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works for everyone.
• Will this shirt shrink? Minimal shrinkage if you wash cold and tumble dry low. Follow the care label and you're good.
• Will the print crack or fade? No. DTG printing puts the ink into the fabric, not on top of it. The design stays put.
• Is this actually funny or just shocking? Both. That's kind of the whole point of Unethical Threads.