{"product_id":"micropenis-club-president-tee-funny-t-shirt","title":"Micropenis Club President Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Micropenis Club President Tee from Unethical Threads is a text-only shirt that announces your leadership of the least enviable organization on earth. You didn't just join. You campaigned, won, and now wear the title with completely unearned pride.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who can take a joke about themselves. That's the only prerequisite.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe Micropenis Club President Tee works because the wearer is the punchline, not someone else. Self-deprecating humor turned up to an uncomfortable volume is exactly why it lands. If you can't laugh at yourself, this isn't your shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that actually feels substantial, not paper-thin garbage\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck (the presidential neckline of choice)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed directly into the fabric so the text stays sharp through every wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAvailable in black or white. The Micropenis Club keeps things simple.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes, if you know the person well enough.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is a tier-three friendship gift. You don't hand the Micropenis Club President Tee to a coworker at the holiday party (though we respect the impulse). You give it to the friend who will immediately put it on and wear it to dinner that night. If someone in your life already makes these jokes about themselves, you're just providing the official uniform.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does the shirt say?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe front reads MICROPENIS CLUB PRESIDENT in text only. No graphics, no logos.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Runs comfortable on everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat colors is it available in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack or white. Two options, no overthinking required.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or peel?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. It's DTG printed directly into the fabric, so the text holds up through repeated washing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this shirt going to offend people?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eProbably. But the joke is entirely at the wearer's expense, which makes it more disarming than offensive. Most people just laugh.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42625709178962,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42625709211730,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42625709244498,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42625709277266,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42625709310034,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42625709342802,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42625709375570,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42625709408338,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42625709441106,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42625709473874,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42625709506642,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42625709539410,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42625709572178,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42625709604946,"sku":"MicroPenisClubPresidentF-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Micropenis_Club_President_Tee_Funny_T_Shirt_Black.png?v=1786790857","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/micropenis-club-president-tee-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}