{"product_id":"my-retirement-plan-is-a-parlay-tee-backprint-funny-t-shirt","title":"My Retirement Plan Is A Parlay Tee (BACKPRINT)","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe My Retirement Plan Is A Parlay tee from Unethical Threads is for anyone who looked at compound interest, looked at a Sunday slate, and made their choice. Back print design on a heavyweight cotton tee in black or white. Your financial advisor would hate this shirt. You're not going to ask them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's this shirt actually for?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who know what a 401k is and have decided against it. The type whose group chat doubles as a financial advisory board and whose savings strategy has legs, locks, and a prayer.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you've ever described a bet slip as a \"portfolio\" or explained your retirement timeline as \"one big hit away,\" this was already yours. The design sits across the upper back, so from the front you look like a completely responsible adult. The truth only comes out when you walk away.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eHeavyweight cotton\u003c\/strong\u003e that outlasts most parlay tickets\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S-4XL.\u003c\/strong\u003e Room at the table for everyone.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eCrew neck.\u003c\/strong\u003e Keeping it simple. Fiscally and otherwise.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDTG printed\u003c\/strong\u003e for color that won't fade on you. Unlike some retirement strategies.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBack print only.\u003c\/strong\u003e Front is blank. Plausible deniability until you turn around.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eDoes this work as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAbsolutely. If you know someone whose retirement plan makes their family nervous at holidays, this is the move.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's the gift that says \"I believe in your system\" without actually putting any money on it. Available in black or white, sizes S through 4XL.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable on everyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the design on the front or the back?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBack only. The front is completely blank, so you look like a responsible adult from the front. The reveal happens when you walk away.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the print quality like?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDTG (direct-to-garment) printed. Sharp detail and color that holds up over time.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this actually good retirement advice?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. This is a t-shirt, not a financial plan. But you already knew that.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat colors does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eBlack or white.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42660578459730,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42660578492498,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42660578525266,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42660578558034,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42660578590802,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42660578623570,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42660578656338,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42660578689106,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42660578721874,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42660578754642,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42660578787410,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42660578820178,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42660578852946,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42660578885714,"sku":"MyRetirementPlanIsAParlayB-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/My_Retirement_Plan_Is_A_Parlay_Tee__BACKPRINT__Funny_T_Shirt_Black.png?v=1788186410","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/my-retirement-plan-is-a-parlay-tee-backprint-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}