{"product_id":"physical-touch-is-my-love-language-so-grab-my-neck-funny-t-shirt","title":"Physical Touch Is My Love Language So Grab My Neck Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Physical Touch Is My Love Language So Grab My Neck Tee from Unethical Threads takes the five love languages and sends them straight to horny jail. Heavyweight cotton, available in black or white, and it says what your dating profile legally cannot.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho's Actually Wearing This?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who took the love language quiz and chose violence. Your partner who thinks quality time is too vanilla, the friend who overshares at brunch, anyone who read the five love languages and thought \"this needs a sixth option.\" It works as a personality test you can wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that feels like a real shirt, not a screen-printing afterthought\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck (ironic, considering the subject matter)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the design won't crack, peel, or quietly disappear after a few washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAvailable in black or white\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eDoes This Work as a Gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes, and it's funnier than a candle. If you know someone well enough to buy this for them, you already know it'll land. Valentine's Day, anniversary, or \"I saw this and thought of you\" energy. Just maybe don't hand it over at a family gathering.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does the Physical Touch Is My Love Language So Grab My Neck Tee come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Runs true to size.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill the print crack or peel?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eNo. DTG printing bonds the ink directly into the fabric fibers, so it holds up wash after wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this going to offend someone?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAlmost certainly. That's a feature, not a bug.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat's the shirt made of?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eHeavyweight cotton with a crew neck. Comfortable for all-day wear, inappropriate for most settings.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDoes it come in other colors?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack or white. Pick your fighter.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42808443502674,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42808443535442,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42808443568210,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42808443600978,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42808443633746,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42808443666514,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42808443699282,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42808443732050,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42808443764818,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42808443797586,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42808443830354,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42808443863122,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42808443895890,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42808443928658,"sku":"PhyiscalTouchIsMyLoveLanguageF-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/Physical_Touch_Is_My_Love_Language_So_Grab_My_Neck_Funny_T_Shirt_Black.png?v=1791925063","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/physical-touch-is-my-love-language-so-grab-my-neck-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}