{"product_id":"this-was-my-only-shirt-with-no-cum-on-it-tee-funny-t-shirt","title":"This Was My Only Shirt With No Cum On It Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe This Was My Only Shirt With No Cum On It Tee from Unethical Threads is exactly what it sounds like. You've got one clean shirt. This is it. And now everyone within reading distance knows the bar you're working with.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who've accepted the situation and decided to lean into it. If you sort your laundry into \"clean,\" \"floor clean,\" and \"absolutely not,\" this tee is your white flag.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's honest. Disgusting, but honest. And that kind of self-awareness is rare enough that you might as well put it on a shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that can take a beating (and apparently needs to)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck, because at least something about you should be classic\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed so the design outlasts your dignity\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMachine washable, which feels especially relevant here\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eDoes this actually work as a gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes, for exactly the right person. Best friend, college roommate, that one cousin who peaked in 2012.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you have to wonder whether they'd be offended, they're not the right person. If you already know they'd wear this to Thanksgiving dinner, go ahead and hit add to cart.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works for everyone who's given up on decency.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this shrink in the wash?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt's pre-shrunk heavyweight cotton. Wash it as many times as you need to. We're not judging.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the print going to crack or fade?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo. DTG printing bonds the ink directly to the fabric, so the design holds up wash after wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCan I return it if I change my mind?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCheck our return policy on site. But once you've worn this out in public, do you really want to go back?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs this appropriate for work?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThat depends entirely on where you work. We're going to say probably not, but we've been surprised before.\u003c\/p\u003e\n","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42349853638738,"sku":"NoCIT-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42349853671506,"sku":"NoCIT-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42349853704274,"sku":"NoCIT-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42349853737042,"sku":"NoCIT-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42349853769810,"sku":"NoCIT-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42349853802578,"sku":"NoCIT-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42349853835346,"sku":"NoCIT-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/This_Was_My_Only_Shirt_With_No_Cum_On_It_Tee_Funny_T_Shirt.png?v=1774450047","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/this-was-my-only-shirt-with-no-cum-on-it-tee-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}