{"product_id":"we-dont-bite-people-lies-adults-tell-kids-funny-t-shirt","title":"We Dont Bite People Lies Adults Tell Kids Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe We Dont Bite People Lies Adults Tell Kids Tee from Unethical Threads is a front-print quote shirt that takes one of those earnest things grown-ups say and files it where it belongs: under \"lies.\" The punchline is a single line of small text. If you get it, you get it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eWho actually wears this?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePeople who grew up hearing very confident rules that turned out to have asterisks. Parents who've made peace with the hypocrisy. Friend groups where the bar for acceptable gift-giving is somewhere below the floor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf your group chat would lose it over this shirt, you're the target audience. It's the kind of tee that does well at barbecues, brewery crawls, and anywhere people appreciate a dry punchline.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeavyweight cotton that doesn't go see-through after three washes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eUnisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL. No weird vanity sizing, just a shirt that fits like a shirt.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCrew neck. Classic, inoffensive. Unlike the shirt itself.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDTG printed, so the design stays sharp and won't crack, peel, or ghost on you\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront print: big quote on top, attribution line underneath. That's it. That's the shirt.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eIs this actually a good gift?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYes. This is the shirt you hand someone when a gift card feels lazy but a heartfelt present feels like too much.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf they laugh at the wrong things and own it, this lands. Birthdays, holidays, group-chat dares, the apology you're not actually sorry about. Wrap it or don't. The shirt does the talking.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003ch2\u003eFrequently Asked Questions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat does the shirt actually say?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe front print reads \"WE DON'T BITE PEOPLE!\" in bold white text, with \"- LIES ADULTS TELL KIDS\" underneath as a small attribution line.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIs the print quality good?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDTG (direct-to-garment) printed on heavyweight cotton. The design won't crack, peel, or fade into a ghost of itself after a few washes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat sizes does this come in?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eS through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. No vanity sizing, no odd cuts. It fits like a normal shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWill this offend someone?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003ePossibly. Most people read it, pause, and then laugh. If someone gets upset about a quote tee, that's a them problem.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Unethical Threads","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ Small","offer_id":42542777008210,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-Black-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Medium","offer_id":42542777040978,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-Black-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Large","offer_id":42542777073746,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-Black-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":42542777106514,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-Black-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":42542777139282,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-Black-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":42542777172050,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-Black-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":42542777204818,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-Black-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Small","offer_id":42542777237586,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-White-S","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Medium","offer_id":42542777270354,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-White-M","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Large","offer_id":42542777303122,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-White-L","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":42542777335890,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-White-XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":42542777368658,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-White-2XL","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":42542777401426,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-White-3XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":42542777434194,"sku":"WeDontBitePeopleF-White-4XL","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0551\/9402\/6066\/files\/We_Dont_Bite_People_Lies_Adults_Tell_Kids_Funny_T_Shirt_Black.png?v=1786218025","url":"https:\/\/unethicalthreads.com\/products\/we-dont-bite-people-lies-adults-tell-kids-funny-t-shirt","provider":"Unethical Threads","version":"1.0","type":"link"}