AAA A Clean Beaver Always Gets More Wood T Shirt

Unethical Threads put "A Clean Beaver Always Gets More Wood" on a shirt because of course we did. It's heavyweight cotton, unisex fit, and exactly as inappropriate as it sounds. If you got the joke, you're the target audience.

Who actually wears this?

People with a functioning sense of humor and zero interest in playing it safe.

Your buddy who always takes the joke one step further. The person at the cookout who makes the host nervous. You know who you are, and honestly, we made this shirt for you.

• Heavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with a print on it
• Unisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL
• Crew neck, because we're inappropriate, not animals
• DTG (direct-to-garment) print, so the beaver stays crisp wash after wash
• Free shipping, because at least something in life should be

Is this a good gift?

For the right person, it's the best gift you'll ever give.

If you're buying this for someone who laughs at things they probably shouldn't, congratulations, you just won the gift exchange. If you're buying it for your mother-in-law, we respect the energy but can't be held responsible for what happens at dinner.

Frequently Asked Questions

What sizes does the Clean Beaver shirt come in?

S through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it works for pretty much everybody.

Is the print going to crack or fade?

No. It's DTG printed, which means the ink is embedded in the fabric. It holds up through washes without peeling or cracking.

Is shipping free?

Yes. Free shipping on every order.

Will this shirt offend people?

Probably. That's sort of the point. If everyone loved it, we'd be doing something wrong.