AAA Crab Rangoon Slut T Shirt

The Crab Rangoon Slut tee from Unethical Threads is for everyone who treats their takeout order like a committed relationship. If you've ever whispered sweet nothings to a plate of rangoons at 1 AM, this shirt just gets you.

Who actually wears this?

People with a genuine, emotional attachment to fried appetizers. The kind of person who gets personally offended when a restaurant skimps on the cream cheese.

You know who you are. You've counted rangoons at a buffet to make sure you're getting your money's worth, and you're not even a little ashamed.

• Heavyweight cotton that can handle your MSG-fueled lifestyle
• Unisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL (rangoon lovers come in all sizes)
• Classic crew neck, because some things don't need reinventing
• DTG printed for color that lasts longer than your self-control at a Chinese buffet
• Pre-shrunk, so it still fits after the food coma

Is this a good gift?

If someone in your life has ever said "I could eat my weight in crab rangoons," just buy it.

This is the kind of gift that makes people feel genuinely seen. Better than a gift card. More personal than flowers. Significantly cheaper than therapy.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is this shirt actually called Crab Rangoon Slut?

Yes. That's exactly what it says. If that bothers you, we have other shirts, but they're also inappropriate.

What sizes does the Crab Rangoon Slut shirt come in?

S through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit, so it works for everyone.

Will this shirt shrink in the wash?

It's pre-shrunk heavyweight cotton. Follow the care instructions and it holds up just fine.

How is the design printed?

DTG (direct-to-garment) printing. The colors stay put with no cracking, peeling, or fading into a sad beige blur.

Can I wear this to a restaurant?

You can wear it anywhere you want. Whether you should is between you and your server.