AAA Dont Scare Me I Poop Easily T Shirt

The Don't Scare Me I Poop Easily tee is Unethical Threads putting your medical reality on a shirt. If your fight-or-flight response has a direct line to your colon, this is your uniform. Consider it a warning label.

Who actually needs this shirt?

Anyone who's had a jump scare send them sprinting to the bathroom. You know who you are.

Your friends definitely know too, because you've told them (probably mid-sprint). This shirt just makes it official and saves you the explanation next time someone sneaks up on you at the office. It's not oversharing if it's printed on your chest.

• Heavyweight cotton that can handle stress (yours and the washing machine's)
• Unisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL, because anxiety pooping doesn't discriminate
• Classic crew neck for people who have enough going on without a weird collar
• DTG printed so the colors stay locked in wash after wash
• Pre-shrunk so it still fits after the dryer does its worst

Is this a good gift?

It's a perfect gift. This is what you get for the friend who announces their bathroom schedule to the group chat.

The one who can't ride a roller coaster without consequences. They'll laugh, they'll feel seen, and they'll wear it to Thanksgiving dinner just to watch your mom's face. You're not just giving them a shirt. You're giving them permission.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does this shirt run true to size?
Yes. It's a unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes, but most people grab their usual.

Will the print crack or fade?
No. It's DTG printed, which means the ink is embedded in the fabric. It holds up through regular washing without cracking or fading.

Is this appropriate to wear in public?
There's no profanity on it. It's just aggressively honest about a universal human experience. So yes, technically.

What sizes do you carry?
S through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit across the full range.