Drunk Cigs Dont Count Gorilla Smoking Tee (BACKPRINT)

The Drunk Cigs Dont Count Gorilla Smoking Tee is Unethical Threads' tribute to the most reliable lie in nightlife. A Nat Geo style gorilla casually lighting up on the backprint, because even primates know the rules change after midnight. This one's for the "I only smoke when I drink" crowd.

Who's actually buying this?

People who swear they quit. Also their friends who've watched them bum six cigarettes every Saturday since 2019.

The nature documentary aesthetic makes this hit different. It's not just a smoking joke on a shirt. It's a whole anthropological moment printed on your back, like some NatGeo cameraman caught a silverback making questionable life choices at 2 AM.

• Heavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue with sleeves
• Unisex relaxed fit from S to 4XL
• Classic crew neck
• DTG printed so the gorilla stays crisp through the wash cycle
• Backprint design, meaning people behind you in line get the real show

Is this a good gift for a social smoker?

It's the best gift. Period.

Every friend group has that one person who "quit three years ago" but still needs a lighter at every party. Hand them the Drunk Cigs Dont Count tee and watch the denial crumble in real time. They'll act offended for about four seconds, then they'll wear it every weekend.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does this shirt run true to size?

Yes. It's a unisex relaxed fit available from S to 4XL. Go with your normal size for a classic fit.

Where is the design printed?

The gorilla smoking design is printed on the back (backprint). The front is clean.

Will this shrink in the wash?

It's heavyweight cotton. Wash cold, tumble dry low, and it holds up fine.

Is this actually about smoking?

It's about the sacred rule that drunk cigarettes exist in a parallel universe where consequences don't apply. Whether you believe that is between you and your lungs.

Can I wear this around my parents?

Technically yes. Strategically, that depends on your family.