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Unethical Threads

I Am Normal And Can Be Trusted With Alcohol Hat

I Am Normal And Can Be Trusted With Alcohol Hat

Regular price $29.99 USD
Regular price Sale price $29.99 USD
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The I Am Normal And Can Be Trusted With Alcohol hat from Unethical Threads is a trucker hat for people whose friends already know better. Slap this on at the cookout and let the lie do the heavy lifting. Nobody's buying it, but that's the whole point.

Who actually wears this hat?

Anyone who's been cut off at least once and thought it was funny. This is the hat you put on when your track record speaks for itself and you've decided to lean into it instead of fight it.

Your friends will laugh. The bartender might not. Either way, you showed up honest (technically).

  • Structured foam front panels that hold their shape, unlike your evening
  • Breathable mesh back for airflow when things inevitably get heated
  • Adjustable snapback closure, one size fits most heads and most bad decisions
  • Printed design that lasts, won't crack, peel, or fade no matter how many brunches you survive
  • Unisex fit, because poor impulse control knows no gender

Is this hat a good gift?

It's the perfect gift. Giving someone this hat says "I know exactly who you are and I'm not sugarcoating it."

Works for bachelor parties, birthdays, fantasy football losers, or anyone who needs a warning label more than a present. If you have to think about whether this fits someone in your life, it fits someone in your life.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does this hat come in different sizes?

It's a snapback trucker hat with an adjustable closure. One size fits most.

Will the print hold up?

Yes. The design is printed to last through regular wear and won't crack or fade.

Is this hat structured or floppy?

Structured. The foam front panels keep their shape so the text stays readable from across the bar.

Can I wear this to a bar?

You can wear it anywhere. Whether they'll still serve you is between you and management.

Does this hat actually make people trust me with alcohol?

No. If anything it has the opposite effect. But at least everyone knows where you stand.

Materials

  • Runs true to size
  • Premium Cotton (fiber content may vary for different colors)
  • Tear-away label

Size Chart

Our Shirts Fit True-To-Size! We recommend ordering your usual go-to size!

Shipping Times

Seamless Worldwide Delivery: Relish our global shipping at no cost. Shipping times may vary depending on your country—refer to our checkout page for detailed specifics. Your satisfaction is our foremost priority!

Return Policy

Every purchase includes a 100% Money Back Guarantee. If you aren’t completely satisfied with the shirt you can send it back within the first 30 days for a full refund. For More information, please refer to our Refund Policy

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