I Don't Like People Who Take Drugs For Example Airport Security Tee

The I Don't Like People Who Take Drugs For Example Airport Security Tee from Unethical Threads is a deadpan grammar joke disguised as a moral stance. Reads one way until it doesn't. Available in black or white, heavyweight cotton, and exactly the kind of thing that gets you a second look at TSA.

Who wears this to the airport?

Brave people. Also, people with PreCheck who can afford to be smug about it.

This is the shirt for anyone who treats a TSA pat-down like performance art. Comes in a relaxed unisex fit and pairs well with a carry-on full of completely legal items that somehow still look suspicious on the X-ray. Wear it through security. We dare you.

• Heavyweight cotton that doesn't go see-through after three washes
• Unisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL
• Crew neck, because V-necks are for job interviews
• DTG printed, so the text stays sharp and doesn't crack or peel like your patience at baggage claim
• Available in black or white

Is this a good gift?

If the person you're buying for has ever ranted about TSA confiscating their toothpaste, yes. Absolutely.

It's the kind of gift that says "I know exactly who you are and I'm not sorry about it." Works for birthdays, holidays, or as a passive-aggressive bon voyage present. Ships in sizes S through 4XL because strong opinions come in all builds.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is this shirt about drugs?
It's about the English language being a minefield. The joke is a grammar trick, not a lifestyle.

What sizes does this come in?
S through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit.

Will this get me stopped at airport security?
We can't promise it won't. But if it does, at least you'll be on-brand.

Does the print fade or crack?
DTG (direct-to-garment) printing keeps the text sharp. No cracking, no peeling.

What colors does it come in?
Black or white.