I Eat Healthy I Am A Vagitarian Tee

The I Eat Healthy I Am A Vagitarian Tee from Unethical Threads is a dietary declaration on heavyweight cotton. You either get this joke immediately or you don't, and honestly, we're not here to explain it.

Who actually wears this?

People who peaked in humor somewhere around age 14 and never looked back. That's a compliment.

This is the shirt you throw on when subtlety isn't even in the building. The I Eat Healthy I Am A Vagitarian Tee works best on people who don't need a disclaimer before they open their mouth. Cookouts, dive bars, family dinners where you've already given up on impressing anyone.

• Heavyweight cotton that actually has substance, not the sheer stuff you get from a 5K fun run
• Unisex relaxed fit in sizes S through 4XL
• Crew neck, because you're here for the joke, not a fashion revolution
• DTG print for color that sticks around longer than most New Year's resolutions
• Front print on black or white, pick your backdrop

Can I give this as a gift?

Absolutely. This is the gift that says you actually know someone.

Skip the candle. Skip the gift card. The I Eat Healthy I Am A Vagitarian Tee is for the friend, brother, or partner who would genuinely laugh at this and wear it in public without flinching. If you have to wonder whether they'd be into it, pick a different shirt. But if you already know, you're done shopping.

Frequently Asked Questions

What sizes does the Vagitarian tee come in?

S through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable on everyone.

Will the print fade after washing?

The DTG print holds its color well. Wash inside out on cold if you want to baby it, but it handles regular washing just fine.

Is this shirt appropriate for work?

That depends entirely on where you work. Corporate office? Hard no. Your buddy's garage? Employee of the month.

What material is this shirt?

Heavyweight cotton. Real fabric with actual substance, not the paper-thin stuff that falls apart after a few washes.

Will this offend people?

Some people, yes. If universal approval is your thing, we have bad news about this entire website.