I Have A Snake That Wants To Visit Your Garden Tee

The I Have A Snake That Wants To Visit Your Garden Tee from Unethical Threads is exactly what it sounds like. A gardening metaphor that has nothing to do with gardening, printed on heavyweight cotton in black or white. You already know what the snake is.

Who actually wears this?

People who think subtlety is overrated but still want plausible deniability.

The gardening community has not claimed this one. Wear it to a cookout and watch your aunt piece together the subtext in real time. That's the entire point.

• Heavyweight cotton that feels like a real shirt, not a translucent napkin
• Unisex relaxed fit, S to 4XL, because everyone deserves to make terrible first impressions
• Classic crew neck (we're crude, not experimental)
• DTG print bonds the ink into the fabric so the joke survives your laundry habits
• Available in black or white, pick your level of visibility

Is this a good gift?

It's a perfect gift if you actually know the person's sense of humor.

This is the shirt you buy for the friend who says what everyone else was thinking. Not for your boss. Probably not for your mother-in-law (unless she's cool, in which case, go ahead and become the favorite). Perfect for birthdays, white elephants, or pure "I saw this and thought of you" energy.

Frequently Asked Questions

What sizes does this come in?
S through 4XL. It's a unisex relaxed fit, so check the size chart if you're between sizes.

Will this shirt shrink?
It's pre-shrunk heavyweight cotton. Follow the care label and it stays the size you ordered.

Is the print going to crack or peel?
No. DTG printing bonds the ink directly into the fabric. No cracking, no peeling, no sad fading.

Can I wear this in public?
Technically nothing on this shirt is explicit. That's the whole bit. You'll be fine unless someone thinks really hard about it, which they will.

What colors does this come in?
Black and white. Two options, both equally good at broadcasting your intentions.