I Would Dropkick A Child For A Costco Hotdog Tee (BACKPRINT)

The I Would Dropkick A Child For A Costco Hotdog tee from Unethical Threads is for anyone whose $1.50 combo loyalty has crossed into felony territory. Backprint design, so the threat hits them on your way out.

Who actually wears this?

People who genuinely believe the Costco food court is a spiritual experience.

You know the type. They've got opinions about the churro and strong feelings about the removal of the Polish sausage. They don't just go to Costco for bulk toilet paper. They go for the ritual. This shirt is their uniform.

• Heavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper freebie from a 5K you didn't finish
• Unisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL (yes, 4XL, we're inclusive about our bad decisions)
• Crew neck, because V-necks are for people who make responsible choices
• DTG printed so the colors stay loud wash after wash
• Backprint design, so the person behind you in the food court line knows exactly what you're about

Is this a good gift?

Honestly, yes.

If you know someone whose Costco membership is their whole personality, this is the move. It's funnier than a gift card and way more personal than another candle. Just make sure they can take a joke. If they can't, that's a them problem.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is this printed on the front or back?
It's a backprint design. The front is blank so you can maintain plausible deniability until you walk away.

What sizes does this come in?
S through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable.

Will the print fade after washing?
Nope. DTG (direct-to-garment) printing keeps the colors locked in. Wash inside out on cold if you want to baby it.

Is this actually about Costco?
It's about the $1.50 hotdog combo and the unhinged devotion it inspires. Costco should honestly be thanking us.

Can I wear this to Costco?
You absolutely can and should. The food court employees have seen worse.