I Would Dropkick A Child For A Jose Cuervo Tee (BACKPRINT)

The I Would Dropkick A Child For A Jose Cuervo tee is a backprint graphic from Unethical Threads for people whose tequila loyalty borders on criminal. Heavyweight cotton, unisex fit, and a punchline that hits hardest when you're walking away.

Who Actually Wears This?

People who've made tequila their whole personality and aren't interested in pretending otherwise. You know the type. They order Cuervo before the bartender finishes asking, they've got a bottle at home with one shot left "for emergencies," and they find the concept of dropkicking a child for tequila not only funny but reasonable. This is their uniform.

• 100% heavyweight cotton that actually feels like a shirt, not a napkin
• Unisex relaxed fit in sizes S through 4XL
• Crew neck, short sleeve, classic black
• DTG (direct-to-garment) printed so the graphic won't crack, peel, or fade into nothing after a few washes
• Backprint placement. The front is clean. The punchline is behind you.

Is This a Good Gift for a Tequila Person?

It's practically required. If someone in your life has strong opinions about tequila brands and a sense of humor that makes other people nervous, this is the gift. Wrap it, don't wrap it, who cares. They'll put it on immediately. Birthdays, holidays, random Tuesdays.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is this shirt actually offensive?

It's a joke about loving tequila. If someone reads it literally, that's a them problem, not a you problem.

What sizes does this come in?

S through 4XL in a unisex cut. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.

Will the print hold up after washing?

It's DTG printed on heavyweight cotton. Wash inside out on cold and tumble dry low. The print stays put.

Is the design on the front or back?

Backprint only. The front is clean. All the chaos is behind you, literally.

Does it come in colors other than black?

No. It's black. This shirt doesn't do pastels.