*NEW* I Would Dropkick A Child For A Lucky Strike Tee

The I Would Dropkick A Child For A Lucky Strike tee is Unethical Threads at its most honest. Some people just have their priorities straight, and those priorities involve a Lucky Strike and questionable impulse control. This shirt is for them.

Who actually wears this?

People who've been asked "what's wrong with you?" so many times it stopped being a question and became a personality trait.

Lucky Strike fans, agents of chaos, and the friend everyone's a little afraid of at brunch. You already own at least one shirt that makes your mom sigh. This is the next one. It pairs well with poor decisions and a complete lack of shame.

• Heavyweight cotton that can take as much abuse as your reputation
• Unisex relaxed fit, S-4XL (yes, we got you)
• Crew neck, because we're unhinged, not animals
• DTG printed so the colors stay vivid long after your friends stop being surprised by you
• Pre-shrunk. The shirt, not your social circle. That part's on you.

Will this actually offend people?

Almost certainly. That's the point.

If you wanted safe you'd be on some other site buying a shirt that says "But First, Coffee." This is Unethical Threads. We knew what we were doing when we made a shirt about dropkicking children for cigarettes. You know what you're doing by buying it. We respect that.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is this shirt actually about Lucky Strike cigarettes?

Yes. It's a love letter to Lucky Strike, written by someone who probably shouldn't be around children.

What sizes does this come in?

S through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable on everyone.

Will the print fade after washing?

No. DTG (direct to garment) printing keeps the colors locked in. Follow the care instructions and it'll outlast most of your relationships.

Is this a good gift?

If you know someone well enough to give them this, you already know the answer. Yes.

Is the fabric cheap and thin?

No. This is heavyweight cotton with a relaxed fit. It has actual substance, not the tissue paper stuff from fast fashion brands.