If My Tongue Is Evil Punish It With Your Toes Tee (BACKPRINT)

The If My Tongue Is Evil Punish It With Your Toes tee from Unethical Threads takes King James phrasing and steers it somewhere deeply unholy. The design sits on the back, so everyone walking behind you gets a free theology lesson they didn't sign up for. Available in black or white.

Who actually wears this?

People who think "if thine eye offend thee" was missing a third act. Two types buy this shirt: the ones who clock the biblical structure first and do a slow double take, and the ones who skip straight to grinning.

Either way, it rewards careful readers with about five seconds of stunned processing time. This is the shirt for whoever in your group chat says the thing everyone else was only thinking.

• Heavyweight cotton that doesn't go see-through after a few washes. Your back print stays between you and the viewer.
• Unisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL. Room for everybody.
• Crew neck. Classic. Nothing to overthink here.
• DTG (direct-to-garment) print, so the colors hold without cracking, peeling, or ghosting out like cheap vinyl.
• Available in black or white, because your devotional kink wear deserves options.

Should I give this as a gift?

Only if you know the recipient well enough to hand them a shirt about toe punishment without getting blocked.

This is a friendship litmus test. If you're second-guessing whether they'd laugh, they probably won't, and you should get them a candle instead. But for the right person? They'll wear it to every cookout until the seams give out.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is the design on the front or the back?

It's on the back. The front is clean, so you get the delayed reaction when people read it as you walk past.

What sizes does this come in?

S through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.

Will the print fade or crack?

The DTG printing method bonds ink directly into the fabric, so it holds up through washes without cracking or peeling.

Does this come in other colors?

It's available in black or white. Two solid options.

Is this shirt thick or see-through?

Heavyweight cotton. You're not showing anything you didn't intend to show.