If My Tongue Is Evil Punish It With Your Toes Tee

The If My Tongue Is Evil Punish It With Your Toes tee from Unethical Threads takes Old Testament energy and redirects it somewhere the congregation wasn't expecting. Available in black or white. It says what you were already thinking, just in a cadence that definitely skipped Sunday school.

Who actually wears this?

People whose browser history would make a theologian cry. This shirt hits hardest if your sense of humor lives in the space between scripture and sin. If that's you, you already know this one is yours.

• Heavyweight cotton that feels substantial, not tissue-paper thin
• Unisex relaxed fit in sizes S through 4XL, because degeneracy is inclusive
• Crew neck for that classic silhouette your mother would approve of (she will not approve of the rest)
• DTG printed for color that survives the wash cycle and the judgment of strangers
• Comes in black or white, both equally incriminating

Can I actually gift this to someone?

Only if you really know them. This is not a safe office Secret Santa pick. It is, however, the single greatest gift for that specific friend who quotes Leviticus and also has a very particular internet presence. You know exactly who they are. They'll love it. Everyone else at the party will have questions.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is the If My Tongue Is Evil Punish It With Your Toes shirt offensive?
That depends entirely on your relationship with both scripture and feet. Most people laugh. Some people blush. A few do both.

What sizes does this come in?
S through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable on everyone.

Does the print fade after washing?
No. DTG printing bonds the ink into the fabric. Your regrettable choices will remain vivid for years.

What colors is this available in?
Black or white. Pick your fighter.