Micropenis Club President Tee

The Micropenis Club President Tee from Unethical Threads is a text-only shirt that announces your leadership of the least enviable organization on earth. You didn't just join. You campaigned, won, and now wear the title with completely unearned pride.

Who actually wears this?

People who can take a joke about themselves. That's the only prerequisite.

The Micropenis Club President Tee works because the wearer is the punchline, not someone else. Self-deprecating humor turned up to an uncomfortable volume is exactly why it lands. If you can't laugh at yourself, this isn't your shirt.

• Heavyweight cotton that actually feels substantial, not paper-thin garbage
• Unisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL
• Crew neck (the presidential neckline of choice)
• DTG printed directly into the fabric so the text stays sharp through every wash
• Available in black or white. The Micropenis Club keeps things simple.

Is this actually a good gift?

Yes, if you know the person well enough.

This is a tier-three friendship gift. You don't hand the Micropenis Club President Tee to a coworker at the holiday party (though we respect the impulse). You give it to the friend who will immediately put it on and wear it to dinner that night. If someone in your life already makes these jokes about themselves, you're just providing the official uniform.

Frequently Asked Questions

What does the shirt say?
The front reads MICROPENIS CLUB PRESIDENT in text only. No graphics, no logos.

What sizes does this come in?
S through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Runs comfortable on everyone.

What colors is it available in?
Black or white. Two options, no overthinking required.

Will the print crack or peel?
No. It's DTG printed directly into the fabric, so the text holds up through repeated washing.

Is this shirt going to offend people?
Probably. But the joke is entirely at the wearer's expense, which makes it more disarming than offensive. Most people just laugh.