Missionary So We Can Keep Arguing Tee

The Missionary So We Can Keep Arguing tee from Unethical Threads is for couples who treat intimacy like a staff meeting with an agenda. You know who you are. If your relationship runs on equal parts passion and pettiness, this shirt is basically a uniform.

Who Actually Wears This?

People who've had a full argument about whose turn it is to pick dinner while actively in bed. The kind of couple that says "we need to talk" and means it literally, at all times, in every position. This shirt just makes it official.

• Heavyweight cotton that can take as much punishment as your relationship
• Unisex relaxed fit, S-4XL so you can both wear one (and argue about who wore it first)
• Classic crew neck because some things don't need to be complicated
• DTG printed for color that won't fade, even if the spark does
• Pre-shrunk fabric so it fits the same after every wash and every fight

Is This a Good Couples Gift?

It's a great couples gift if you both have a sense of humor about how chaotic your dynamic is. Nothing says "I love you but I'm not done making my point" quite like this. Anniversary, Valentine's Day, or just a random Tuesday where you need to acknowledge that the pettiness is part of the charm.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does this shirt run true to size?

Yes. It's a relaxed unisex fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes, but most people grab their usual.

Will this offend someone?

Probably. That's sort of the point. If someone gets uncomfortable over a relationship joke on a t-shirt, that's a them problem.

What's the print quality like?

DTG (direct-to-garment) printing. The design stays sharp and colorful wash after wash. No cracking, no peeling.

Can I wear this around my partner's parents?

You can wear it anywhere. Whether you should is between you and whatever survival instincts you have left.