*NEW* I Would Dropkick A Child For A Baja Blast Tee

The I Would Dropkick A Child For A Baja Blast tee is exactly what it sounds like. Unethical Threads made this for the people who'd commit light felonies over a fountain drink. If you know, you know.

Who actually wears this?

People with strong opinions about Taco Bell's drink menu.

You've got the Baja Blast loyalists who treat every Taco Bell run like a religious experience. You've got the friend group where someone inevitably says something like this out loud and absolutely means it. This shirt just puts it in writing so there's no ambiguity.

• Heavyweight cotton that doesn't feel like a tissue paper freebie from a 5K you didn't finish
• Unisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL. Everyone deserves to publicly announce their priorities.
• Crew neck. You're unhinged, not a V-neck person.
• DTG printed directly into the fabric for color that actually lasts. The joke stays crisp even if your life doesn't.
• Pre-shrunk. We're not trying to trick you.

Is this actually a good gift?

Honestly, yes.

If someone in your life has ever said something remotely close to "I would dropkick a child for a Baja Blast," you hand them this shirt. Birthday, Christmas, random Tuesday. The bar for a perfect gift is knowing someone well enough to buy them something this specific.

Frequently Asked Questions

What sizes does this come in?

S through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.

Will the print crack or fade?

No. It's DTG printed directly into the fabric, not slapped on top. It holds up through the wash.

Is this shirt actually about Baja Blast?

Yes. This is a shirt for people who feel very strongly about a specific Taco Bell beverage. That's it. That's the whole thing.

Is this offensive?

To children, probably. To Baja Blast fans, it's aspirational. Context matters.

Can I wear this in public?

That's the point. You could also frame it, but we think you should wear it to Taco Bell specifically.