*NEW* I Would Dropkick A Child For A Barq's Root Beer Tee

The "I Would Dropkick A Child For A Barq's Root Beer" tee from Unethical Threads says what every Barq's loyalist has been thinking. It's aggressive, it's specific, and it's printed on heavyweight cotton that won't quit on you. If your drink order is a personality trait, this is your uniform.

Who actually wears this?

People who have very strong opinions about root beer. The kind of person who will correct you if you call Barq's "just a soda."

You know someone like this. You might be someone like this. Either way, this shirt lets the world know exactly where you stand, and it's on the wrong side of reasonable.

• Heavyweight cotton that actually feels like a real shirt, not a tissue paper situation
• Unisex relaxed fit from S to 4XL, because commitment to Barq's knows no size limit
• Classic crew neck, nothing weird going on up top
• DTG (direct-to-garment) print so the colors stay locked in, not one of those iron-on nightmares
• Pre-shrunk, so it fits the same after laundry day as it did when you impulse-bought it

Is this actually a good gift?

One of the best. If you know someone who drinks Barq's with the intensity of a person training for the Olympics, this is the move.

It's specific enough to feel personal and unhinged enough to be memorable. Works for birthdays, Christmas, Secret Santa (especially if you want to get removed from the gift exchange), or just a random Tuesday because you saw it and immediately thought of someone.

Frequently Asked Questions

What sizes does this shirt come in?

S through 4XL. It's a unisex relaxed fit, so it runs comfortable on everyone.

Will this shirt shrink?

It's pre-shrunk heavyweight cotton. It holds its shape and doesn't pull a disappearing act in the dryer.

Is the print going to crack or peel?

No. It's DTG printed, meaning the ink is in the fabric, not sitting on top of it. Color stays put.

Is this shirt offensive?

That depends entirely on how you feel about hypothetical children and root beer. Most people laugh. Some won't. You already know which group you're buying for.