Professional Wiener Flutist Tee (BACKPRINT)

The Professional Wiener Flutist Tee from Unethical Threads is exactly the credential your resume has been missing. Back-printed on a heavyweight cotton tee in black or white, so everyone walking behind you can fully appreciate your distinguished career.

Who actually wears this?

Band kids who grew up but didn't grow out of it. The type who sees a double meaning and leans all the way in.

This is the shirt for whoever in your friend group would genuinely list this on a business card if they thought they could get away with it. It's also for the person buying it for that friend, because you already know exactly who they are.

• Heavyweight cotton that feels like an actual shirt, not a conference freebie
• Unisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL
• Crew neck, because a V-neck would fundamentally change the energy
• DTG printed for color that outlasts your last situationship
• Design on the back. The front says nothing. Just like a true professional.

Does this work as a gift?

Extremely well.

This is what you buy when a card feels lazy but actual thoughtfulness is off-brand for your relationship. Perfect for birthdays, white elephants, retirement parties (real or ironic), or anyone who played an instrument in school and still brings it up. They'll know you get them. That's the whole gift, really.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is the design on the front or the back?

It's on the back. The front is blank.

What sizes does this come in?

S through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit.

Will this shrink?

It's heavyweight cotton. Follow the care label and you're good.

Is this appropriate?

That is genuinely not our department.

Does this make a good gift?

It's low effort on your part and maximum reaction on theirs. So yes.