Spank Me Like A Pack Of Cigarettes Tee

The Spank Me Like A Pack Of Cigarettes Tee from Unethical Threads is a deadpan innuendo shirt built on one very specific smoker's ritual. You pack a fresh pack of cigarettes by smacking it firmly against your palm a few times to settle the tobacco. This shirt cheerfully requests the same treatment.

Who actually wears this?

Confident adults who enjoy watching strangers do the math. The two-second delay while a non-smoker works out what packing a pack of cigarettes means is half the fun.

Bachelorette parties love this one. Bar crawls, music festivals, birthday nights out. If you're looking for a funny adult humor shirt that reads across a room, this is it. It's also a killer gag gift for a partner or the friend who treats public embarrassment as a competitive sport. The kind of naughty shirt that gets worn immediately, not folded into a drawer.

• Heavyweight cotton. The kind you actually want against skin if you're going to be making requests like this.
• Unisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL. Room for everyone with questionable judgment and good taste.
• Crew neck. Clean lines, maximum chaos from the collar up.
• DTG (direct-to-garment) print. The text stays crisp through every wash, even if your reputation doesn't.
• Available in black or white.

Is this actually a good gift?

One of the best. This is the funny offensive shirt that gets unwrapped at the party and immediately pulled on over whatever someone's already wearing.

Works for bachelorette gifts, birthdays, Valentine's Day if your relationship runs on sarcasm, or just because you saw it and thought of someone specific. The Spank Me Like A Pack Of Cigarettes Tee lands because the joke is oddly precise and a little absurd. It's a party shirt and a personality test in one. For adults only, obviously.

Frequently Asked Questions

What does "spank me like a pack of cigarettes" mean?

When you open a fresh pack of cigarettes, you pack it by smacking it against your palm a few times to compress the tobacco. The shirt takes that mundane smoker's ritual and turns it into an innuendo. It's a simile, delivered completely deadpan.

What sizes does this come in?

S through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit, so check the size chart if you're between sizes.

Is this shirt offensive?

It's an innuendo, not an insult. Most people either laugh or spend a few seconds working out the cigarette reference, which is honestly the best part.

What colors is this available in?

Black or white. Pick the one that matches your energy.

Is this a good bachelorette party shirt?

Practically made for it. Funny, a little naughty, and it gets the whole group laughing before the first round of drinks.