Stop Becoming Lash Techs We Need More Strippers Tee

The Stop Becoming Lash Techs We Need More Strippers Tee from Unethical Threads is a deadpan workforce correction printed on a shirt. Someone looked at the labor market, ran absolutely no numbers, and decided to issue a public memo anyway. Available in black or white.

Who's actually wearing this?

People who deliver economic policy recommendations at the bar with zero credentials and full conviction. If you've ever had a take so unresearched it circled back around to being funny, this is your uniform.

You're not an economist. You're not on any advisory board. You're just a person who looked at workforce distribution across two specific industries and decided the market needed a correction. And then you put it on a shirt, which is the least efficient way to influence labor policy. But here we are.

• Heavyweight cotton. Holds up better than your labor market analysis.
• Unisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL.
• Crew neck. Classic cut for your very unclassic opinion.
• DTG printed so the ink bonds into the fabric. No cracking, no peeling, no fading out before you do.
• Available in black or white. Your memo looks official either way.

Is this going to offend someone?

Almost certainly. But the punchline is you, the person who looked at the world and decided THIS was the workforce shortage worth addressing. Not nurses. Not teachers. This.

You've got no authority, no data, and no business commenting on labor allocation, and you went public with a position statement anyway. That's the whole bit. Everyone else is fine.

Frequently Asked Questions

What sizes does this come in?
S through 4XL. Unisex relaxed fit across the full size range.

Will the print crack or fade?
No. DTG printing bonds the ink into the fabric, so the design holds up and won't crack or peel.

Does this come in other colors?
Black and white. The workforce memo doesn't need a color palette.

Is this a good gift?
If the person has ever delivered a confident, zero-research hot take at a cookout, this is basically a uniform.

What's the shirt made of?
Heavyweight cotton with a relaxed, comfortable fit. Soft enough that you'll forget you're wearing a public policy announcement.