The Owner Of The Boner Tee

The Owner Of The Boner Tee from Unethical Threads is a deadpan diagram worn on a human body. One arrow points up at your face, another points down, and bold block capitals in between handle the rest. It's signage, not subtlety.

Who wears this?

People with a firm grip on self-awareness. The kind who'd stand still for a museum placard if it described them accurately enough.

The design runs top to bottom: arrow up, three lines of block text, arrow down. It turns the wearer into a labeled cross-section, and the whole thing lands with the quiet confidence of something that absolutely should not be on a shirt. Comes in black or white.

• Heavyweight cotton that won't go see-through after a few washes (which, given the subject matter, matters)
• Unisex relaxed fit, S-4XL
• Crew neck
• DTG print for color that outlasts your dignity
• Available in black or white

Is this a good gift?

If you know them well enough to point at their anatomy with printed arrows, yes.

Bachelor parties, birthday revenge, any holiday where honesty beats sentimentality. The Owner Of The Boner Tee works wherever the dress code has already been abandoned. Pair it with a card that just says 'sorry'.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is The Owner Of The Boner Tee comfortable?

Heavyweight cotton, relaxed unisex fit, crew neck. It's built for all-day wear, even if society isn't ready for all-day you.

What sizes does this come in?

S through 4XL. Ownership is not size-restricted.

Will this shirt get me in trouble?

That depends on where you wear it and how much you care. The arrows do the talking. You just stand there.

Does the print fade?

DTG printing keeps the color locked in. The arrows will still be pointing long after you wish they'd stop.

What colors does The Owner Of The Boner Tee come in?

Black or white. Pick your fighter.