Told Myself To Stop Drinking But Im Not Gonna Listen To An Alcoholic Tee (BACKPRINT)

The Told Myself To Stop Drinking But I'm Not Gonna Listen To An Alcoholic Tee from Unethical Threads is back-printed circular reasoning on heavyweight cotton. The person behind you reads the responsible-sounding part first, catches the punchline in the smaller text underneath, and realizes you were walking toward the bar the whole time.

Who Actually Wears This?

The friend every group has. The one who's first to arrive, last to leave, and has examined their relationship with drinking just enough to find the whole thing hilarious.

Beer-league teammates, pub quiz regulars, tailgate veterans, and the person everyone texts "you coming out tonight?" as a formality because the answer has never once been no. Also a killer gag gift for birthdays, Father's Day, or St. Patrick's Day when the recipient's reputation does all the gift-wrapping for you. The back print means they're broadcasting it to the entire room on the walk to the bar.

• Heavyweight cotton that handles bar crawls, Sunday sessions, and whatever comes after
• Unisex relaxed fit, S through 4XL. Room for everyone at this table
• Crew neck, blank front. All the damage is on the back
• DTG print for color that stays put. The joke sticks around longer than your good intentions
• Back print layout: big bold setup on top, smaller punchline underneath. Two-stage read for maximum impact on anyone walking behind you

Is This a Good Gift?

It's the perfect gift for someone who's impossible to shop for because they're always at the bar.

Birthdays, Father's Day, St. Patrick's Day, holiday white elephants. This is the shirt you give when you want to say "I see you, and I respect the commitment." They'll wear it. Frequently. Possibly every weekend.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is the design on the front or the back?
The design is printed on the back only. The front is completely blank, so you look perfectly respectable coming and going. Well, coming at least.

What sizes does this come in?
S through 4XL, unisex relaxed fit. Runs true to size.

Is the print durable?
DTG (direct-to-garment) printing keeps the text sharp through plenty of wash cycles. The joke sticks around longer than your good intentions.

Will this offend someone?
Only people who think they can reason with themselves after the third round. Everyone else will laugh.

Can I wear this to a family event?
Technically yes. Whether you should is between you and your family's sense of humor.