Wasted Seamen T Shirt

The Wasted Seamen T Shirt from Unethical Threads is exactly what it sounds like. Nautical theming, regrettable wordplay, and the kind of humor that tells people everything they need to know about you before you even open your mouth. If you know, you know.

Who actually wears this?

People who peaked in their sense of humor around age 14 and never looked back.

Honestly, the Wasted Seamen tee lands at beach weekends, boat days, bachelor parties, and anywhere else plausible deniability is a factor. It's the shirt you wear when you want to be funny without having to actually be funny.

• Heavyweight cotton that doesn't feel like a disposable napkin
• Unisex relaxed fit, sizes S through 4XL (yes, we thought of you too)
• Classic crew neck
• DTG (direct-to-garment) print, so the colors stay put through washes
• Pre-shrunk, because surprises are for birthdays, not laundry

Will this offend someone?

Absolutely. That's sort of the point.

The Wasted Seamen shirt sits in that sweet spot where people either love it or pretend they don't. If your family group chat would flag it, perfect. If your coworkers would do a double take, even better. Unethical Threads makes shirts for people who stopped worrying about that a long time ago.

Frequently Asked Questions

What sizes does the Wasted Seamen T Shirt come in?
It runs S through 4XL in a unisex relaxed fit. Check the size chart if you're between sizes.

Is the print going to crack or fade after washing?
No. It's a DTG (direct-to-garment) print, which means the ink is in the fabric, not sitting on top of it. Wash inside out on cold if you want to be extra careful.

Is this a good gift?
If the person you're buying for laughs at stuff they probably shouldn't, yes. It's a crowd favorite for birthdays, bachelor parties, and white elephant exchanges.

What material is it made of?
Heavyweight cotton. It has actual substance to it, not the thin see-through stuff you get from fast fashion brands.

Can I wear this to work?
That depends entirely on where you work and how much you value your employment.